Husband 14 days clean of meth

Old 03-15-2017, 01:37 AM
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Husband 14 days clean of meth

Well, my husband has made it 14 days clean of meth after I told him he had to leave our apartment if he used again since his using was really beginning to impair me. It's amazing how in just 14 days I feel so much better since the chaos has been gone. Part of me is worried that he is motivated to stay clean because we have a 14 day vacation coming up that he is really excited about, and that he may just use again when we come back because he won't be as happy with a vacation to look forward to. By the time we get back from our vacation, he will have 1.5 months clean from meth if he stays clean. Does anyone know who has experience with meth if this will give him a good start to possibly not wanting to use when we get back?
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Old 03-15-2017, 06:04 AM
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I am so happy for you and for him that he has made this effort and I pray he can stay on the good path.

Meth takes a long time to heal from and rid from the system, many rehabs recommend long term programs for meth addicts because it takes longer for the brain to stabilize than with many other drugs.

That said, the success of any addict to become clean and stay clean is often directly related to their willingness to do what needs to be done to get there. Some can just stop and never use again, I pray your husband is one of those lucky (and hardworking) people.

Enjoy your vacation, enjoy each day and I hope you will both have happier and healthier days ahead.

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Old 03-15-2017, 07:43 AM
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In my experienced and that of many others, an addict cannot get clean and remain that way just to keep a roof over their head or to go on a vacation.

Trust your gut on this one!

What kind of a program is he working to help him stay clean?
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Old 03-15-2017, 12:17 PM
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Meth is a tough nut to crack, so to speak. It's highly important that he is highly motivated to get clean and stay clean and continue to do so....I don't know what kind of program he has going. Don't mean to sound skeptical, but a lot of folks can get clean for a short time period; it's staying clean that's hard. Beware of the post vacation "let downs" that we all get; it might be a huge trigger for him.
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Old 03-15-2017, 03:12 PM
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This is clichéd, but this is one of those situations where you hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Pay attention to your gut, and don't be surprised if things go awry.

Keep us posted.
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Old 03-15-2017, 07:37 PM
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Hi Freedom, my qualifier was a meth user. He went all the way to shooting up. Miraculously he got clean and as far as I know has stayed so. It did take a 3 year stint in jail though. I left long before that.

Hope for the best and be sure you have a good solid plan if this hope is not fulfilled.
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Old 03-19-2017, 01:57 AM
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Husband is still clean from meth but his drinking has escalated like before. I think he thought I would overlook the drinking since he knew I hated the meth but now I have informed him the excessive drinking is a deal breaker as well. I told him if the 4 beers in the fridge each night is not enough since he would also bring home beer or drink before coming home, then this is also a life I don't want to be a part of like the meth. I admit the alcohol is the lesser of the two evils since the half life of the hell is shorter, but it still is a deal breaker. Thank goodness I never bought a house with my husband and we only have a lease together in an apartment. My parents have also let me know that I am welcome at their home at any time which is 10 minutes away.
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Old 03-19-2017, 05:30 AM
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You are wise to spot the danger of drinking too. A drug is a drug and alcohol is a drug, drinking is not the solution to drug addiction just as smoking pot is not the solution to alcohol addiction...most recovering addicts and alcoholics have tried and failed at the drug replacement plan.

You are keeping it simple, you set your boundaries out and made them clear, and you are prepared to take action if the boundaries are not respected.

Whatever you choose won't be easy, but I can't imagine a life more hellish than living with addiction. I did it myself for too many years with my son and those were by far the worst years of my life.

Whatever you choose, we are walking with you.

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Old 03-19-2017, 06:35 AM
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Sorry to hear that. I used to play the lesser of two evils game too. I think most addicts have attempted and failed miserably with it. It was not until I realized it wasn't the substance that was the problem. The substance was my attempted solution to the problem. I wasn't comfortable in my own skin and was using the substance to escape so until I learned how to live life sober it was just a series of failures.

Today there is no lesser of two evils. Every single substance that I use to escape goes in the same bucket. There is no hierarchy of substances. I can't say to myself it is only alcohol or only pot or at least it is only powder cocaine and not crack or it is just codeine and not heroin.

It took me a long time to come to that realization unfortunately. Stand firm on your boundaries.
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Old 03-19-2017, 03:55 PM
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i agree.....while it seems AT THIS MOMENT, that things are not as bad, the alcohol is feeding the beast. he's already increasing his consumption, cuz the beast is hungry and it won't be long before he's back to his original love, his original DOC.

i am glad you see it as a dealbreaker.

and i am so sorry. i'm sure you saw just a glimmer of hope. of maybe.
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Old 03-23-2017, 02:06 AM
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Husband is still clean from meth at 22 days. He has also promised to work on cutting down his drinking by not bringing beer home or drinking before coming home (will only drink what's in fridge). I am just happy that it looks like our 2 week cruise on April 1st will happen, crossing fingers. 22 days ago it was uncertain. Once the cruise is over, there will be more time flexibility if he was to hit bottom and suddenly need help even though he refuses any help at the time. He is also looking to get a work promotion, so that may now motivate him to stay clean when we get back from vacation. In the meantime, I am just trying to remember to take care of myself by exercising, working on my own alcohol recovery of close to 5 months, my career, puppy and extended family.
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Old 03-27-2017, 01:51 PM
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That's great that he's made that far. Trust me each day without meth is a battle. The battles get easier but they are still there. I made it a little less than your husband before i relapsed, but that only lasted a short time, back on track now.
What is the hardest part, for me, is the depression. And that little demon hiding out in my brain whispers..all I need to do is call up any number of people and I could be spun within 30 minutes and then everything would be ok....until it's not again 😭
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Old 04-02-2017, 12:04 PM
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Bad news. So we boarded our cruise today but last night my husband was back and forth from our hotel room and He did meth after having 30 days clean. I immediately knew, and he did it again today from that same guy. I am so disappointed. I guess this shows me that he was just staying clean to go on the cruise. I am not going to confront him about it because I don't want to ruin my 14 day vacation. I just hope that he did not sneak any on the cruise, and I hope he does not crash hard and become mean. What a bummer!
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Old 04-02-2017, 12:11 PM
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you HAD to see that coming, right???
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Old 04-02-2017, 12:17 PM
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I really thought he would want to stay clean for many reasons. I didn't think he would want to possibly sabotage his marriage. If one has the ability to say no for a vacation, why not continue to say no.
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Old 04-02-2017, 12:40 PM
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freedom, he already sabotaged his marriage. he just saw a shiny trinket ahead.....a VACATION!!! so he behaved as long as was necessary. now he STILL gets the prize. and you are stuck with him, however this plays out for the next 14 days.
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Old 04-02-2017, 01:01 PM
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How had he already sabotaged his marriage? If he stayed clean all would have been forgiven?

He has still talked about our future together? And so he thinks I don't know and there is a future.
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Old 04-02-2017, 01:45 PM
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How had he already sabotaged his marriage?

when he started doing METH! and all that went with it. that is no small thing.

perhaps you were willing to overlook and forgive too much? as it was you were focused on the upcoming vacation....as was he. he held it all at bay JUST long enough til you got to the point of no return. he wasn't concerned about the state of the future of his marriage....only the upcoming TREAT. and now, once again. all bets are off.

he doesn't SEE things as you do.
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Old 04-02-2017, 02:11 PM
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I have to admit I'm confused by this whole line of thinking.

You were hoping that he would hold off on the meth for a cruise.

He already had you. He took meth.

Aren't you more important than a cruise?
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Old 04-02-2017, 02:26 PM
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I'm not sure where you are cruising but please please make sure he does not carry drugs...on the ship AND in port. He could end up in prison in a country of bad prisons.

He has put himself and you in a very dangerous position...your marriage falling apart may be the least of your problems.

Please listen to those who are trying to help you. This is so much more than a vacation gone wrong.
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