SorroW22

After crying and pleading for God to guide me, open my eyes last nite- today I confronted my husband ......... started smoking weed again 3 weeks ago. I am in shock and disbelief and hurt so deep on the inside....

PhoenixJ

I empathise. Addiction is very destructive. I can only ask - have you got support for you? Counselling, family support group? You need to look after yourself and stay healthy and safe. Addictive people cannot rely on others- and others cannot assume responsibility for them.
My empathy, prayers and support for you. My prayers for your partner.

Sodevastated

I am so so sorry for you. I know how it feels. My AH relapsed and died and the truth was revealed after he passed away. Please take care of yourself. I have no advice, just want to send you my prayers and empathy.

Bst5881

I am so sorry. I believe my husband has also relapsed but he will not admit it. I think he's moved on to new drugs. It's all very devastating.

AdelineRose

All we can control is ourselves. I know this hurts, and it isn't fair, but all you can do is take care of yourself. Just like he decides to continue to use, you have the right to say enough is enough and set some boundaries for yourself. Do you have a support system of family and close friends that you can reach out to and get the support and honest opinions of the situation? Our loved ones can really help us open our eyes to the situations and provide the advice and help.

You are stronger than you think, and please remember that you are not obligated or forced to stay in a situation that is not healthy and not what you want for your life.

hope778

SorroW22 - I am so sorry. I understand the devastation this brings. No matter how far we've come in our own recovery relapse can make us fall to our knees. It can feel like we're back at ground zero. But really, I am sure you've made progress internally and personally that not even a relapse can take away from you. Be strong and firm. Decide what you are ok with, and what you are not ok with. Everything you've learned thus far still stands. You are worthy of peace and love.

SorroW22

His main drug that put him in rehab was met him last year. But he also smoked weed and he used peels. After confronting him he said he had only been smoking weed for three weeks. I asked him if he remembered me telling him that it was over if he did it again and he said yes but he was too stressed out and he slipped. Ironically before he admitted I had called his counselor to tell him I was worried that he was going to relapse three days before. This turned into him now having to take a drug test while on probation at the counselors request. For the last two days all he has told me is this was all my fault if I had not called his counselor he would not have to be in this situation. That this was just a little weed no big deal. He demanded that I take a drug test also. I have nothing to prove or hide. But I am going today to take one and keep it with me in case he tries to persuade people to think that I am using. He told me I should have never butted it into his recovery that I have ruined it all. I can't even imagine how he thinks this is my fault because he keeps demanding it is not his fault that he did nothing wrong. After two days of this then I get a text out of the blue today asking me if I thought we still had a chance should we work it out ......... both my family and his family are 100% behind me

hopeful4

I prayed and prayed to God for years to show me, guide me what to do. It took a long time to realize he was showing me every day, I was just not looking for his answer, I wanted my answer.

You did not cause it, you cannot control it, you cannot cure it.

Hechosedrugs

I did the same! I got my biggest sign the day I agreed to cancel my divorce. I had a dream that we were standing in a courtroom and I was looking at my ex, saying, "I can't believe you did this to me again."

I was so angry. Why would God give me this sign I'd been praying so hard for AFTER I'd already told my lawyer and my ex that I would cancel? Now it was too late! Only it wasn't really. I just wanted to believe it was. If I had listened to that sign and not cancelled my restraining order things would probably be much different today.

zoso77

Sometimes we're given opportunities under bad circumstances to reassess what's important to us and what we need to be healthy and sane. Perhaps this is one for you?

Step back, breathe, and think: given what you know to be true about him and what you know about yourself, what is best for you?

Keep us posted.