Wife of recovering heroin addict.
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: In the Middle
Posts: 632
Thank you for posting that. My initial reaction when I learned of my daughter's addiction was compassion. All I wanted to do was help her heal and recover. Unfortunately, I focused so intently on helping her that I made her the center of my universe. Then I developed that horrible contemptuous attitude described in the article when she didn't do what I wanted and wasn't grateful.
Eventually I learned everything I could about the disease. I learned to stop trying to control her, and just be there ready to assist and support when she was ready. I learned to stop blaming her when she took advantage of me, and learned to protect myself and my belongings. I learned she was simply doing what addicts do and her behavior was all out of my control. I was left to simply love her, and sometimes from afar.
Eventually I learned everything I could about the disease. I learned to stop trying to control her, and just be there ready to assist and support when she was ready. I learned to stop blaming her when she took advantage of me, and learned to protect myself and my belongings. I learned she was simply doing what addicts do and her behavior was all out of my control. I was left to simply love her, and sometimes from afar.
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 635
This article just made me realize how ironic it is that I decided to give up my dream of becoming a registered dietitian right around the same time I stopped trying to fix my husband's addiction. People are going to eat what they want to eat, regardless of whether or not it's killing them, and addicts are going to keep using, no matter whose lives they destroy in the process. People with food addictions will choose a pill to alleviate symptoms associated with a deficient diet over eating more fruits and vegetables. Addicts will choose suboxone or methadone over truly being clean. And both will suffer side effects from taking medication rather than making radical life changes.
I realize that this is not the takeaway intended, but it's mine, nonetheless. I don't want a thing to do with telling people how to live their lives anymore.
I realize that this is not the takeaway intended, but it's mine, nonetheless. I don't want a thing to do with telling people how to live their lives anymore.
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