Renee46

Can't understand why every time he gets deeper in his addiction, he coldly turns his back on our family, leaving me with all the bills. & Why does he replace me so quickly for a female that is on meth?(the last female,a few yrs ago was on crack).. I've taken care of him,loved him...so,why does it seem im the only one hurting, while he's moved on? Im so confused. 😭😭

Maudcat

Hi, Renee46. Welcome. I am very sorry for your pain and hurt. Your SO is doing what addicts do. Unfortunately, you and your family are collateral damage. This forum has a lot of wisdom that I hope can help. Have you read the "stickies" at the top of the main menu? Lots and lots of good info about dependencies and their effects on families. I also recommend Al-Anon meetings. Good luck.

AnvilheadII

he has a long history of showing you who he really is......incarcerated for 17 years, returning to addiction time and time again, taking up with other female drug addicts. you have tried to maintain a "normal" life but he doesn't FIT that model.....

Refiner

You're trying to make sense of addiction and you just can't. Over time the brain rewires itself and he's been at it a looooong time. The ONLY way "out" is a complete rewiring again in the brain and that takes someone who really REALLY wants it as a life or death decision for themselves and is a LIFE LONG process that gets no "days off". I hope you can finally enter a healing stage in your life and move on because you do deserve better than him.

Lovemyson101

In the end, I don't know if there is a why. We all want a reason but from everything I've readand heard, there just isn't one.
There's just us and the way we deal with the situation.