My wife addicted to meth

Old 09-14-2016, 01:41 AM
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My wife addicted to meth

My spouse of 7 years and married 2 months yes I said 2 months picked up and left 2 weeks after saying I do. I had speculation and I asked her the day after we got married and the day after she took of for the weekend but was denied to over and over again. I knew she did a line the night of our reception I could tell I went to bed alone on our wedding night while she stayed up all night with her meth addict friend. I asked her about it the next day she denied it of course, I wanted to believe her so bad, that I just left it go, knowing she was already a recover cocaine addict for 7 years got clean when she started seeing me knowing that wasn't my cup of tea. Well the whole week on vacation with our son she was very distant and sick and not interested in doing much with us as a family. I finally called her out on talking to her boss thinking that could of been the issue being her boss got me fired on June 14th for being I told my wife she was being a lil to friendly sending rainbow heart emojis and full body shots complaining about her weight and over 150 texts a day. When she told her boss I didn't like it I was terminated and the during my sons birthday party she tried to convince my wife I was toxic and Loni felt like she owed me her life for saving hers and making her into a better person cause Loni stated no she is far from toxic she saved me she made my life better you don't know who I was...well with the distance and all I didn't know what to think at the time all I knew is I was hurting we got in a huge fight the day before we came home and the day we came home she left for 3 days on a binge our son was taking by ambulance to hospital and she didn't even come to the hospital told me she was in no shape to be there. I was crushed she came home Sunday on methed up I asked her if she thinks she needs to get some help she replied get me a drug test I didn't do anything! I said ur actions speak louder than that! Well again another 9 days of pure hell... Everytime I talked to her it was I was attacking her. I caught her sneaking to meet up with her boss in a remote area to me but if I would of drove that way it was easily visible not like they were actually hiding to sneak off to do anything, when I confronted them she said I was crazy and to go home which I did no sense on arguing. At this point I was off the drug topic and onto the boss specially her having the boss bring her back to our house and my wife loading all of her **** into her car and leaving. We didn't speak for 3 days and when we finally did she came home for the weekend, gave me my rings back and wanted to work on us. Than the boss started harassing me asking me if I wanted pictures and such of them *******?... Being really nasty... So Loni and I disconnected again and stopped talking and I was to blame and I started reconnecting with friends and hanging out, I was degraded humilated, she hated me I was this I was that I was everything under the son. But she didn't have no food gas smokes so I took her food her boss was there a fight broke out... Cops came, she told everyone I attacked her which was bs! She attacked her niece when I seperated them she attacked me. So finally I called her bestfriend and told her if she didn't tell me what's really going on being Loni never let anyone touch her family let alone her or the boss get up in her face let alone I was the one to protect her, there was going to consequences. She openly admitted drug use said it wasn't going on now as far as she knew. Well Loni and I go every week not talking 3-4 days than she wants to work on us and one time it was 9 days and she showed up wanting to know what's going on between us. She don't ask abt her son and if she does it's rare this past week she admitted to drug use and said she hasn't done it in awhile which was bs cause she came around Tuesday-Friday once Friday evening came I was no good, hanging with new ppl. She had me so convinced she wanted this to work told her family, wanted to work on coming home, wanted to start counseling, stayed those days with me messaged me all day long intimate 2 out of 3 nights she was here but she was still on it, it don't take 2 hours to please her and it did both nights she was very fustrated annoyed. But started the whole thing I would never specially with everything going on between us by Thursday night she was coming down and was agitated kept apologizing that she was annoyed easily slept a gd 5-6 hours and than Friday her new friends messaged a lesbian married couple who is into meth and swingin to go 2 hours away to clubs and I was history didn't hear from her for almost 24 hrs till I was annoyed enough to say something she replied back sorry I'm alive very hung over. I was at work and didn't reply and I was annoyed 7 years is a lot of time to invest into a relationship and to adopt a son and buy house get married and everything else and drugs and friends are more important?? Abt 10:30 she said I'm glad you get mad but don't respond back.. I said I was sorry and at work and glad she was okay. And I'm sorry ur mad. It's always me!! Never her... So another 48 hrs not talking to me. Again I told her off and she replies back I'm not on drugs got my own place and this is why we can't be together your mouth. Hello ur on drugs? I know u r!!! When does someone admit it and get help I don't want to lose my family but that's what it's coming down to...meanwhile she hasn't helped me once since leaving she is now living with her dealer/nephew so it's not getting any better
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Old 09-14-2016, 04:57 AM
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Hello Burned,

welcome to SR. I'm sorry that you truly feel burned by your wife. I'm sorry I could not quite make out the timeline of your stream of consciousness events above. But I'm sure in your head it's a muddle and you are confused and upset. I often write here on SR and feel better just to write things down and get it sorted out a bit in the process.

Peace,
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Old 09-14-2016, 02:57 PM
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Ann
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I'm sorry too Burned, I know this must hurt and frustrate you.

Maybe take good care of yourself and your child, and step back from all this for a while. Sadly, we cannot compete with addiction and it just gets worse over time.

Good luck.
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Old 09-14-2016, 04:40 PM
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Burned...

Welcome to the Board. I am really, really sorry for what has brought you here, but I'm thankful you took that important step to post.

What you describe in your post is a taste of what your life will be like living with someone in active addiction. So now is a time to stop, take a breath, and then take stock of your situation. Coming here is a good first step. Read as many posts as you can stomach. Absorb it. Look for common threads and how that member proceeded. And then, based on what you understand, make the best decision you can...not based on what you hope, or the fact you love your AW, but on what's best for you and your child.

And that's not an easy thing to do, man. In fact, it can be hard as hell. But the key to getting through this in one piece is to listen to your gut and believe what your eyes are telling you. There's no room for denial. There's no room for false hope. Sometimes we're faced with decisions we don't want to make, but have to.

When you get enough posts under your belt, shoot me a PM and we'll talk.

In the meantime, Welcome to the Board.
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Old 09-14-2016, 05:15 PM
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an annulment sounds like a good idea........
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Old 09-14-2016, 05:25 PM
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Welcome to the board. I have been with my AH for just under 9 years. I wish I could say that in that time he has recovered or even been in recovery but I really cant. He has had small stints of sober time, but very little true recovery. Life with an addict is a constant state of turmoil, followed by hope, followed by let downs, followed by make-ups. And then it starts all over again.

I am sorry for what has brought you here but glad you are talking. Hopefully now is a good time for you to see the stories of others in similar situations and decide what you will tolerate. A boundary is hard to stick to, but you have to keep some sanity or else you will get sucked into the downward spiral.

I hope that you find some peace, and keep posting it really helps.
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