again2016

My son relapsed again no contact for few days and then girlfriend lied said he lost his phone.....found out inpatient again on black out time...........................why and how long I am going on year three of up and down and my heart hurts............thankful he reached out again...want to see him and feel the need to hug him but keeping my distance to keep me alive at this time I hate opiates and the easy access everywhere just needed to post

Nata1980

Relapses suck. Take care of yourself. It will get better!

again2016

Thanks ...it does suck....

needingabreak

Again I am so sorry you are having to deal with this again. I know the heartache that comes with it but the good news is he is getting help.
Allowing him the time and distance to work on this yourself is very wise.
I pray your son finds the help and strength to finally win his battle with this ugly disease. Hugs.

Ilovemysonjj

Dear Again, I think we are on the right path. If we remove our "help" as part of the equation, our guys realize they must check themselves. That means they know sobriety is the ONLY way they will make it and they are fighting their disease with everything they have. I feel that JJ and your son too must feel shame at relapsing, but I am accepting that this disease is never going to go away. its just a matter of how much he loses each time before he decides to stop. At some point, I believe that my son will figure this out BEFORE he picks it back up (lying to himself that he can handle it).

allthatsgood

Again- Ilovemysonjj is spot on with her assessment. I can say the same about my son. Hang in there.

again2016

Your so right...there so young and being humble isn't in the makeup . my son called today ashamed beggin me to come see him cause he needs a hug. I know that I cant pick him up and make it go away even though I always want to.. I told him you know the program and steps dive back in ..................your worth it always Hugs to you darling, I always feel like were going thru this together....

again2016

Thank you all so much... having two at same time sometimes is more than I can handle...but I am thankful for my program and this site. always learning how to give to God ...that's a hard one for me but I need it

again2016

Got a call today from son with a counselor, crying ashamed, frustrated, apologizing ............................I am at a loss sometimes for words, he needs me for love and support and understanding. I get it that is my job. I love him and want to support him always. Back to the tools you know and have learned , so glad you stopped yourself and found help again. I love him so much but then he asks for money for smokes again and money for halfway house I they accept him back. It is endless and the pot of gold is dry .... so dry. I don't know what to do now.,

Ann

Doing nothing is an action, maybe just sit this one out and let him find his way.

You have been supportive and loving, he knows that, the rest is up to him, yes?

I know your pain an am sending you hugs.

again2016

Thanks Ann....I appreciate it and I think I need to

Ilovemysonjj

Again, is your son on probation? If so, he should qualify for inpatient and not have any out of pocket costs. This is a tough decision. I am also at this point, do I support short term housing or no? I am waiting for the recommendation from the detox director on the best place JJ can get in and then we will see what the next steps are. I pray that this time he really got it.

again2016

He is on probation but in another state, that hasn't caught up to him and I have stayed out of that part cause it eats away at me. By support do you mean money? this time around I am not helping with that part cause I cant I have nothing left to offer the debt is so huge and now having a second one in first time around im doing my best to give him the same opportunities I pray as well for your son and my two....they have learned the tools and hopefully each time get a lttle closer to longer sobriety...............hugs to you

again2016

Well got a bill in the mail from an ambulance company for my son, Didn't understand what it meant cause he didn't tell me that there was an ambulance involved in his last relapse, my heart, my son... finally go thru to center he is in and was allowed to speak to him Too ashamed to tell me that he amost OD or as he said just got bad stuff this one time, only to wake up in a hospital bed scared to death, his words. I hate this disease, I could have lost him ....I didn't I know I have to look at the best side, I didn't loose him, he sounds more scared then ever this time and absolutely humble first I ever really heard that emotion in his voice. I know from coming here this has happened to many , many times but it is my first experience and it is debilitating to say the least. Is this it? The bottom? Is there really a rock bottom? Every time I think one of mine have hit it there is a new event. Please know I am so thankful God was on his side this time, I am very thankful but so scared at the mere thought of how quickly life can be taken away from us, Does he know how amazing he is? How this world would miss his amazing laugher and smile, and love of life?? Why , I just want to know why sometimes the big "why" with no answer cause it just is what it is............needed to share thanks

Ilovemysonjj

Hugs to you my dear. I received a hospital bill during the time JJ was "out there" back a few years ago. He had been stabbed in the hand! It was terrifying to say the least.
Praying that your son is realizing how precious life is.

again2016

Thanks so much ! I don't know what I would do without SR I pray for all the struggling addicts

Ann

I'm keeping you and your sons in my prayers, Again. I really hate what addiction does to those we love so much.

Hugs from one mama's heart to another's.

again2016

so now my boyfriend of 1 year wants out Too stressful to deal anymore with me and my situation with my two addicts . wow never asked for anything ...really barely talk about them cause they are safe and where they should be working there program. no and then I might have needed an extra hug or something but really work thru here and my naranon meeting Cowardly thing to do maybe helped me to dodge a bigger bullet. Feeling sad but know that my drive to support my kids will be first and I have finally not allowed it to be the only thing I do or talk about but I guess not enough Just had to vent

Refiner

I'm guessing the ambulance bill was the last straw bc you'll probably pay it. Why are you receiving it? Your son is an adult. I'm guessing your boyfriend sees you getting sucked dry by your son and figures the pressure will be on him any time to start bailing the son out since you have nothing left. Don't blame him, really.

FeelingGreat

Hi again, I don't see why you have to pay for the ambulance. You weren't involved at all. Send it back to them and let them try to get it from your son.