Holding my breath
 

So, it is two days until the police will come to forcefully remove my brother and his wife from the trailer where they've been staying with no water, no electricity and not paying rent.

It's been a couple weeks since I kicked them out of my house and they went back there.

I want to hope that they've found somewhere else and have started moving. I don't really think so, though, since they haven't called me or my parents to ask for help moving. Maybe they got someone else to help but I think they've used all of their friends up, too. The last time my dad saw them, they still hadn't actually looked for anywhere.

So, I'm just kind of waiting for the fall out. My parents are split on whether to let them stay at their home. If they move into my parents' home, I don't know what I'll do, but I get kind of enraged thinking about it. They have point blank told me that there's a crystal meth dealer looking for them because they owe him hundreds. My parents don't deserve to be in that danger. But I've told my parents about that, so I guess that's all I can do.

I'm really expecting them to show back up here. I want to firmly proclaim that I would NEVER give in to that. But, it will be a lot harder than kicking them out was. When I kicked them out, I knew that although they didn't have a safe place to go with utilities, they could get away with sleeping in that trailer for a while. But there are a million reasons they shouldn't be here. Like that drug dealer looking for them. Or them coming in high on crystal meth. Or smoking marijuana right here in the living room. Or keeping me, hubby and puppies sick from stress. Or mistreating my puppies. Or bringing lots of extra animals in the environment.

But... that's my brother. And that seems to outweigh all of the sound logic in the world.

I dont have any advice for you WG but wanted to tell you I'm thinking of you in this difficult time. When this is all settled I want you to change your name to Strong Girl. WG may have let them stay and stress her out but Strong Girl isnt having any of it.

Your parents are their own people. You gave then all the info. If they choose to use it good for them. If not ........ Well you warned them

Now, therein lies the rub. As long as others do for them what they could and should do for themselves, they will not even try to make a better life.

They are not trying and yet everyone who loves them are worried and trying to figure out how to help.

I can't make anyone's choice for them, but maybe just letting this unfold on its own would be a good plan. They know where real help is, when they are ready. There are free recovery programs everywhere, the Salvation army has a good rehab and program and there are meetings every day in all areas of the country.

It is very hard to watch those we love self-destruct, I know how it hurt me to watch my son, but the thing is...if we get too close and stay there, we will be destroyed with them.

My prayers go out for your family.

Hugs