Why No contact is so important!
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 275
Why No contact is so important!
Oh, family, did I learn another painful lesson. I have had no contact with soon to be ex-husband and it felt good. I pray, I learn to let go, I filed for divorce, it's over, go on. He did not want to sign my divorce waiver and that is fine, I will just go a longer road that is going to take about 8 months. So he reaches out to me from someone else's FB account, begging to just talk for one second because he is ready to send me the waiver documents for divorce, and no hard feelings, and he understands he is a total piece of chit, we done, he will always love me, papers ready, need to talk. NO CONTACT!!!!!
I thought, ok, well, how will it hurt if I talk to him for 5 minutes about divorce proceedings. Oh, boy. 2 minutes later he was sending pictures of "broken" finger that he had to have surgery on, but there is no doctor at the time, and the rehab where he was at basically said there is an issue with insurance and they don't want to be responsible for his finger, and they FORCED morphine on him in the hospital and he FIERCELY fought it, but was finally forced to take it (you know finger is a serious business). They also gave him narcos, which he threw away and basically he is supposed to fly out to a sober living in Cali (rehab in Nevada) and now he is in the middle of the street with no food or water, because the flight is in a week, and he will live on the street until his mama will send him bus ticket to cali and yes, divorce papers are coming. OMG!!!!!!!!!!
next 4 minutes i felt guilt and western unioned him $40 for food, then his mama called and said she western unioned him $300 :
Then I got it, OMG, you stupid stupid girl, will you EVER EVER LEARN??????
His therapist called mama - there was no broken finger, there was no morphine, he has been using heroin in rehab and brought it to people and was kicked out. He was also busted with some girl on the grass doing whatever. NASTY!!!!
For second day now, my serenity is gone, I feel crazy, I haven't fed the dogs, I haven't cooked, I drink wine like a fish, I chain smoke and I am so angry. Only after 1 conversation. THEY ARE TOXIC, TOXIC TOXIC TOXIC, like heroin toxic.
I don't care if he calls from a hospice because his d*ck is falling and he can't breathe and he needs to talk to me one more time. NO MORE CONTACT, or I will end up in some rehab myself.
I thought, ok, well, how will it hurt if I talk to him for 5 minutes about divorce proceedings. Oh, boy. 2 minutes later he was sending pictures of "broken" finger that he had to have surgery on, but there is no doctor at the time, and the rehab where he was at basically said there is an issue with insurance and they don't want to be responsible for his finger, and they FORCED morphine on him in the hospital and he FIERCELY fought it, but was finally forced to take it (you know finger is a serious business). They also gave him narcos, which he threw away and basically he is supposed to fly out to a sober living in Cali (rehab in Nevada) and now he is in the middle of the street with no food or water, because the flight is in a week, and he will live on the street until his mama will send him bus ticket to cali and yes, divorce papers are coming. OMG!!!!!!!!!!
next 4 minutes i felt guilt and western unioned him $40 for food, then his mama called and said she western unioned him $300 :
Then I got it, OMG, you stupid stupid girl, will you EVER EVER LEARN??????His therapist called mama - there was no broken finger, there was no morphine, he has been using heroin in rehab and brought it to people and was kicked out. He was also busted with some girl on the grass doing whatever. NASTY!!!!
For second day now, my serenity is gone, I feel crazy, I haven't fed the dogs, I haven't cooked, I drink wine like a fish, I chain smoke and I am so angry. Only after 1 conversation. THEY ARE TOXIC, TOXIC TOXIC TOXIC, like heroin toxic.
I don't care if he calls from a hospice because his d*ck is falling and he can't breathe and he needs to talk to me one more time. NO MORE CONTACT, or I will end up in some rehab myself.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
His therapist called mama - there was no broken finger, there was no morphine, he has been using heroin in rehab and brought it to people and was kicked out. He was also busted with some girl on the grass doing whatever. NASTY!!!!
For second day now, my serenity is gone, I feel crazy, I haven't fed the dogs, I haven't cooked, I drink wine like a fish, I chain smoke and I am so angry. Only after 1 conversation. THEY ARE TOXIC, TOXIC TOXIC TOXIC, like heroin toxic.
For second day now, my serenity is gone, I feel crazy, I haven't fed the dogs, I haven't cooked, I drink wine like a fish, I chain smoke and I am so angry. Only after 1 conversation. THEY ARE TOXIC, TOXIC TOXIC TOXIC, like heroin toxic.
If it's any consolation, I was a slow learner too and it took me about a gazillion trillion "this time is different's" before I "got it" and let go.
Get your divorce, embrace new beginnings and let the past fade behind you as you ride out of Dodge into a beautiful sunset.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
put down the wine. that's the road HE travels.
sorry this happened.....here's a good rule of thumb....when someone calls with a "problem" but the STORY starts to sound more like a Quentin Tarantino film, you know you're being snowed. and if they are reaching out to you on someone else's FB, they obviously have somewhere to go.
so lesson learned. feed your dogs, feed yourself, take a shower and wash it all down the drain. and be glad you only got snookered for $40.
sorry this happened.....here's a good rule of thumb....when someone calls with a "problem" but the STORY starts to sound more like a Quentin Tarantino film, you know you're being snowed. and if they are reaching out to you on someone else's FB, they obviously have somewhere to go.
so lesson learned. feed your dogs, feed yourself, take a shower and wash it all down the drain. and be glad you only got snookered for $40.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 275
Thank you, everyone. I have prayed a lot and after having a glass of wine at 11 am this morning, I stopped. I took a breath and asked God to please take this away from me. I went to sleep, woke up before kids came from school, walked the dogs, cooked dinner, cleaned a bit, answered all my work emails and slowly have this little piece of serenity back. It is so fragile, I am not tough, this is really not a game. Co-dependency is also a disease, at least for me. I have to hold on to this no contact thing for dear life. Thank you so much everyone, for kind words and thoughts and prayers through these 3 years 
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 1,792
Originally Posted by glitterdeva 
Thank you, everyone. I have prayed a lot and after having a glass of wine at 11 am this morning, I stopped. I took a breath and asked God to please take this away from me. I went to sleep, woke up before kids came from school, walked the dogs, cooked dinner, cleaned a bit, answered all my work emails and slowly have this little piece of serenity back. It is so fragile, I am not tough, this is really not a game. Co-dependency is also a disease, at least for me. I have to hold on to this no contact thing for dear life. Thank you so much everyone, for kind words and thoughts and prayers through these 3 years
FORGIVE him, and move on. You have small children and animals to look after.
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