loro

Hello!
I have finally reached my bottom with my significant other. He is an opiate addict. He went to rehab earlier this year and claims he's been sober, but he's showing a lot of signs... nodding, applying for loans behind my back (he doesn't work), lying about EVERYTHING, staying out late and not answering his phone.... you know the drill.
Anyway, regardless of whether he is actually on drugs, I am sick of the lying and I want to break away. I have threatened this in the past, which ended with him leaving and threatening suicide. Of course I end up chasing him down.
I am terrified to bring it up to him because I'm afraid he will actually do it. I've just been avoiding him for the past 2 days after uncovering a big lie, and we live together which isn't very easy.
I previously had a sponsor (I was having the same situation with another guy... yay) and she said that if he kills himself, it isn't my fault and I shouldn't worry about it so much. But it is just so difficult for me. He has had a lot of bad things happen to him lately- botched surgeries, totalled his car in an accident, lost his job earlier this year... always something. He seems like he's at the end of his rope and might actually do it. I have made up my mind and do not want to stay with him.

Help!

cynical one

IMO, suicide threats should ALWAYS be taken seriously by calling 911 each and every time. Most of us do not have the training to handle these situations, but First Responders and medical professionals do. If the threats are serious, he will get the help he needs. If the threats are manipulation, he will see that you are not going to play the game.

JOIE12

^^ yes to what cynical one wrote ^^

Ann

^^^^

Yes, call 911 every single time. If it's real, they need to take over. If it's manipulation, they will stop. Good luck.

FindingMe2

My ex was threatening suicide over and over so I called 911. He is still alive and hasn't threatened it again in over a year. I was told by my therapist to make the call and I am so glad I finally did!!

Anaya

Hello, loro

Add me to those who say to call 911.

I am sorry to hear of the situation, know this is harrowing and emotionally draining, and can be extremely difficult for all involved.

Are you willing to seek out another sponsor or other support? Take care.

loro

Thanks guys! Thankfully, suicide was not brought up this time. Now I just need to get him out of the house!

hopeful4

loro...I am glad to hear that. Be prepared that it may happen ( threats ) as you try to get him out. I second what Cynical said above. Taking those types of threats seriously and calling 911 does one of two things,

1. Shows him you are not messing around, or allowing yourself to be manipulated by that type of threat.

2. Gets him the help he needs if he is in that situation

So, what's your next step to freedom??

loro

I couldn't kick him out on the streets because he's on the lease and his dad paid our rental deposit, so there were a couple awkward days where we had to be "roommates".
But, today I was talking to my co-worker about the break up and she said he had "borrowed" money from her 2 weeks ago. She is the sweetest, most angelic person I know so when I found out, he knew I was mad enough to where had to go now. He moved in with his mom for now. She can have fun with that.
Unfortunately I dated a crack addict before this so I have been through this before... I have experience so I know it will be okay. It is a huge relief to not have to obsess about what he is doing anymore or what fiasco I have to deal with today.