Finding it hard to surrender

Old 04-03-2015, 05:20 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 412
Blog Entries: 1
Finding it hard to surrender

I am posting here a lot, because it is about all I do at the moment - process the fact that my husband is an addict and now I have left.

It helps though, to post here.

What I have noticed today is I am finding it hard to fully surrender.

I don't like being defeated. Much less by something like alcohol or drugs!

I like to think of myself as a Go Getter, someone who can make extraordinary things happen in my life, so it doesn't sit well to be so powerless over this!

However, I know deep down, why would I be any different to the millions who have suffered because of addiction. Why would I be able to defeat the undefeatable? (unless of course the addict decided to defeat it).

I am no different.

And yet it's hard to let go. It's hard to stop trying and to say 'OK, I leave what happens in the hands of God'.

I still want to 'rescue' him, although I know I cannot.

I did do 2 things today, rightly or wrongly - I sent a message to his Stepdad, who is probably the most level headed in his family and who I got along with, and told him that he is still using.

I just want them to know.

If they don't believe me that is their business, but at least I have tried. I also sent an note to his Dr flagging up that I think he is using. I know they cannot talk to me because of patient confidentiality, however at least they can be aware.

Now, how to take care of me?
CarmenLove is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to CarmenLove For This Useful Post:
GardenMama (04-04-2015), hopeful4 (04-03-2015)
Old 04-03-2015, 07:27 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 19
I can understand what you mean, I have suffered the same debate over the past few years. Fortunately, I have been given some good advise regarding my wife from the people at SR. Recently, I looked at myself in the mirror and asked, "what else can I do?" and I have soon realized there is nothing. On numerous occasions I begged, pleaded, threatened, and cried for my wife to get help and talk to me.

As of now she has turned my step kids, friends, and her side of the family against me. I can only focus on my well being and the well being of the people who love me and I will love them back. Remember the C' did not cause, you can't control, and you can't cure. The hardest part about doing something about the addict is making the decision to do it. Best of luck to you.
Destroyed is offline  
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Destroyed For This Useful Post:
CarmenLove (04-03-2015), GardenMama (04-04-2015), hopeful4 (04-03-2015)
Old 04-03-2015, 07:38 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Mountainmanbob's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,207
I still battle with it everyday

EGO Ease God Out

Mountainmanbob is offline  
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Mountainmanbob For This Useful Post:
CarmenLove (04-03-2015), hopeful4 (04-03-2015)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:48 AM.