What does the addict think and feel?

Old 11-13-2014, 11:07 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 21
What does the addict think and feel?

Ive been wandering how an addict thinks not just about being uncaring, but oon an everyday basis. Are the Happy people when they have their drugs? Are they missrable all the time? Or only unhappy when they cant get their drugs? Do they ever think about the people they have hurt or only think about them doing them wrong? Im very interested in what goes through their minds
Lovehurtswaddic is offline  
Old 11-13-2014, 11:32 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
Chino's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
I think the answers to your questions depend on the person, the circumstances, the drug of choice, and what stage the addict is at with their addiction. For instance, the biological mechanisms of addiction will not be the same between a meth addict and opiate addict. It isn't the same between someone who abuses a substance and someone who is dependent, either.

What do you think and feel about being the loved one of an addict?
Chino is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 06:03 AM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: WI
Posts: 240
I've been wondering myself. My AH is now missing. I'm ball of anxiety worrying about his health and for my kids and I worried maybe we are in some type of danger in his current state of mind. I can't know though ever what's really in his head and unless he's ever clean again, I doubt he could tell me since it appears an addict can't have a logical or rational thought. I think I just partially or fully answered our question. The only goal for them is to get their fix. That's it. Doesn't matter who it hurts or what the consequences, they must get it. So I can't imagine they are happy even once they do get what they are craving. They hurt everyone they love and give up everything they once had for one goal only of staying in the addiction cycle. I know my husband is miserable and I believe now that I have some hindsight, he is more than aware of his anger, that he's really sick, that he's an addict, that he suffers from deep shame. He's financially ruined us, been verbally abusive, has disappointed us and abandoned us. And there's not a damn thing I can do about it. But I know he's not happy with himself or what he's doing. He just can't stop it. I'm going to lose my husband to this. I'm divorcing him but I really believe now that he's missing and he's out there somewhere with an untreated heart condition, I'm really just preparing for when I get the news, that it's soon a matter of time that he will die. I think he knows that too. It doesn't matter to him though. He's lost everything now so to him, his misery will be over just that much sooner if he continues on this path.
waitingforhope is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 08:23 AM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 21
Im talking about opiate addict I am doing OK untill he shows up to get more of his stuff. ugh then it starts all over again as the doubts and wanting to contact him, but I havent. My mind is much clearer then it would be if I didnt have this group to read about the real realty of the situation.
In my head Sometimes I still see the fairytale that he is out there having a great time with someone else and being free and happy now that he has no responsibilities and left me with the mess of all the bills being behind. He raised my son for 3 yrs and hasnt even asked about him. That little boy loved him always so happy to see him. Its very confusing at some points. I sometimes wander if he feels like I do and misses everything, but he has already said he wants to come home and I dinnt want him too and I now dont talk to him. My Kids tell me they cant stand him and I can do 10 times better than him, that he had me blinded, that he is a lowlife and will never change. They kinda did an intervention on me about him. lol It worked If they would not have kept coming to me with all of this. I can tell you I wouldnt even be on here I would have just took him back like I always do.
Lovehurtswaddic is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 09:22 AM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Member
 
Chino's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
hiccup lol
Chino is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 09:25 AM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Chino's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: In a good place
Posts: 4,482
Lovehurts, opiate addicts are generally not as extremely psychotic as meth addicts, but that's not saying much. When someone is completely dependent + grossly abusing their drug of choice, we end up seeing primal behavior. They won't allow anything to come between them but that doesn't necessarily mean they don't feel.

But, if they were an ass before addiction, they become an ass x100.
Chino is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 09:27 AM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: WI
Posts: 240
Your stronger than you think. And our kids sure are smart aren't they? Even in my determination to not fall into the pattern of an enabler again, it's like my own addiction that I have to take control of. We have to choose to do that or not to. We aren't just grieving over an addiction but the loss of a part of our lives that we had bigger hopes and dreams for. I know what I'm going through is totally normal. Thank God for the patience of the people on here because they are hearing the same crap over and over from me, Lol. But in the end, I know whatever happens to my husband, I have a responsibility now to my kids and myself first to be emotionally healthy. It doesn't matter what he does, only he can own what he does the same as me. So I'm going to go out there and take care of my crap, do my own homework so I can be well. Use every resource I can and if I take a step back, brush myself off and keep right on trucking. You can do it. We'll do it together ok?
waitingforhope is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 10:49 AM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 21
Wouldnt it be great if we could just be outside looking in and see them how everyone else sees them? Your head gets so messed up when your with an addict that you cant see them for what they really are and how horrible the things are that they do to you
And oh yes he is a major ass. Mean and hateful his family thinks he does no wrong and hes not using again. lol They will soon see because now that he doesnt have us to take his crap out on he will have to have a new target
Lovehurtswaddic is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 11:21 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: WI
Posts: 240
Exactly!
waitingforhope is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 11:36 AM
  # 10 (permalink)  
●▬๑۩۩๑▬●
 
cynical one's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,405
How An Addict Feels
cynical one is offline  
Old 11-14-2014, 10:48 PM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Member
 
allforcnm's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1,927
I usually suggest people spend some time reading on the substance abuse forum... what I usually see is people struggling in various ways to abstain from substances, or figure out how they can life life without a crutch.. many talk about concerns for their families, their children, or careers, how disappointed they are in themselves...

We have been doing a book review, and part of it is examining the effects of drug abuse.. and while different substances have different impact.. drugs in general affect the dopamine in the brain.. the happy feelings we have.. or the inability to feel happy.. drugs affect the prefrontal cortex where we assess risks and weigh consequences.. and the limbic system is also affected... where we are left feeling there is a sense of urgency and panic, etc.... all of these physical symptoms come into play at different times and affect how a person thinks and feels..
allforcnm is offline  
Old 11-15-2014, 05:26 AM
  # 12 (permalink)  
Member
 
ladyscribbler's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
Originally Posted by Lovehurtswaddic View Post
Wouldnt it be great if we could just be outside looking in and see them how everyone else sees them? Your head gets so messed up when your with an addict that you cant see them for what they really are and how horrible the things are that they do to you
And oh yes he is a major ass. Mean and hateful his family thinks he does no wrong and hes not using again. lol They will soon see because now that he doesnt have us to take his crap out on he will have to have a new target
Once I put some time and distance between myself and the relationship, working a recovery of my own, which includes Alanon, individual therapy and not dating, I started being able to see what other people saw, because I was no longer blinded by the fog (fear, obligation, guilt) of my emotions, confusing love with need or fear of being alone.
His family had to learn a painful lesson after I left as well. They couldn't just take my word for it, they had to experience it for themselves. It's part of the process.
ladyscribbler is offline  
Old 11-15-2014, 05:57 AM
  # 13 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: WI
Posts: 240
That spoke volumes to me Lady. Especially about the AH's family.
waitingforhope is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:39 AM.