New or 0ld - Never forget and never be alone
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Exton pa
Posts: 153
New or 0ld - Never forget and never be alone
My story is a lot like all of yours. Children, spouse, relative, lover abusing drugs. My story is a lot like all of yours. Children, spouse, relative, lover abusing drugs.
When it is bad, turn to yourself and SR.
When it is lonely, turn to yourself and SR.
You are never alone - we live this together. We know, we feel, we hurt and we cry together. And on the good days when you feel it's been an easy day, you still come to SR because while you have no "new story" for the moment, you know someone does, and you want them to know, we are here, together, fighting for our rights to peace and happiness and health and we are never alone.
For those of you still hurting in addiction, God be with you and remember we are always here and to always reach out. You are never alone, your story is never stupid or appalling.
It is our story and our walk of life and we will do it together.
When it is bad, turn to yourself and SR.
When it is lonely, turn to yourself and SR.
You are never alone - we live this together. We know, we feel, we hurt and we cry together. And on the good days when you feel it's been an easy day, you still come to SR because while you have no "new story" for the moment, you know someone does, and you want them to know, we are here, together, fighting for our rights to peace and happiness and health and we are never alone.
For those of you still hurting in addiction, God be with you and remember we are always here and to always reach out. You are never alone, your story is never stupid or appalling.
It is our story and our walk of life and we will do it together.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
When I was going through my darkest days, my meetings and SR are what saved my sanity and my life.
Just knowing there were people who understood completely how awful it is to watch someone we love self-destruct, who didn't judge us or blame us but who know what it was like to BE us...was all I needed most of the time. To be heard and validated and led.
Thank you for posting this, Amy, it's a good reminder to old timers and newcomers alike that we walk together sharing our light until others can find their own.
Hugs
Just knowing there were people who understood completely how awful it is to watch someone we love self-destruct, who didn't judge us or blame us but who know what it was like to BE us...was all I needed most of the time. To be heard and validated and led.
Thank you for posting this, Amy, it's a good reminder to old timers and newcomers alike that we walk together sharing our light until others can find their own.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 923
Thank you Amy...it is so true...struggling today...a lot of awareness going on and posted more of my story in the alcoholics forum today and I am overwhelmed...but working my program and turning as much as I can over...and trying not to let the shame and guilt that silences me so many times win.
My meetings and SR and a couple of other things are the only things holding me together...my HP (God) is in control...and I am so very weak...and overwhelmed with feelings that are coming from many years past...and so confused and not knowing what to do...except clinging to looking for a job and asking God for help as I have no clue how I can even do that...but there is no choice.
My family is a mess...and there is so much denial and denial is so hard to deal with...I tend to be fairly honest but have been beaten down by two generations of family in denial...my therapist was good enough to tell me that being scapegoated doesn't always happen...but it does happen and it is often mom or the person perceived as the stronger parent...so wow...at least understanding that there is no 'happily ever after' in this for me...which is a step forward...
I am working to be honest with myself and to not sugarcoat...which meant calling ahead to a family wedding (brother) and listening to him when he told me that I would be perceived as the problem...because when 'mom and I are together' there is always tension. I was very sad for about 3 days last week but realize it was a step forward...I have been so obsessive/compulsive about family support for the past 25 years that it is time for me to let God and let God and not still believe (as I have deep beliefs about) that as the oldest child...it is up to me to be there for my siblings...and for 13 years...they have not been there for me...my children's addictions have been too much for them...but also a good reason to scapegoat and direct things away from two high functioning alcoholic parents.
I am realizing that the reason God has me in recovery is because I need it to live. However, it is now obvious through 3 generations (was always a good observer but didn't realize what was underlying behaviors) and now manifesting in all my adult children...and it is painful to be honest...but it is what it is.
I am glad I can come here and be as honest as I can bring myself to be...because where else?
Thank you to this community. Working my program.
My meetings and SR and a couple of other things are the only things holding me together...my HP (God) is in control...and I am so very weak...and overwhelmed with feelings that are coming from many years past...and so confused and not knowing what to do...except clinging to looking for a job and asking God for help as I have no clue how I can even do that...but there is no choice.
My family is a mess...and there is so much denial and denial is so hard to deal with...I tend to be fairly honest but have been beaten down by two generations of family in denial...my therapist was good enough to tell me that being scapegoated doesn't always happen...but it does happen and it is often mom or the person perceived as the stronger parent...so wow...at least understanding that there is no 'happily ever after' in this for me...which is a step forward...
I am working to be honest with myself and to not sugarcoat...which meant calling ahead to a family wedding (brother) and listening to him when he told me that I would be perceived as the problem...because when 'mom and I are together' there is always tension. I was very sad for about 3 days last week but realize it was a step forward...I have been so obsessive/compulsive about family support for the past 25 years that it is time for me to let God and let God and not still believe (as I have deep beliefs about) that as the oldest child...it is up to me to be there for my siblings...and for 13 years...they have not been there for me...my children's addictions have been too much for them...but also a good reason to scapegoat and direct things away from two high functioning alcoholic parents.
I am realizing that the reason God has me in recovery is because I need it to live. However, it is now obvious through 3 generations (was always a good observer but didn't realize what was underlying behaviors) and now manifesting in all my adult children...and it is painful to be honest...but it is what it is.
I am glad I can come here and be as honest as I can bring myself to be...because where else?
Thank you to this community. Working my program.
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