Sister of an addict/recovering addict
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 168
Sister of an addict/recovering addict
Hey y'all!
I'm wondering if there are any other recovering addicts on here that are affected by another addict.
I'll have 90 days clean on September 22nd (also my 26th birthday!), and my younger sister is still in active addiction. She uses my DOC's (hydro's, oxy's) but she's also dabbled in Meth as I've found out recently. The hardest part about all of this is the fact that she has a young child, whose father is currently in jail for theft (the genius was caught on camera). I'm currently, along with my parents, taking steps to ensure that the child is taken care of (custody).
She's given us the same old merry-go-round story for the past couple months - how she needs to get clean because her life is such a mess. I've tried talking to her about how I feel, but then she goes on a sob story, so I've stopped that - I just give her tough love if I need to talk to her. Actions speak louder than words, and I can honestly say I don't think she's ready to get clean yet and be a productive parent. I hope she proves me wrong, I really do.. but I was at that stage where I wasn't ready to fully get clean yet, either. I recognize the signs. At this point we barely talk, because either she's with her new "boyfriend", she's bitchy, or she's just not at home.
Right now, I attend 2 face2face Narcotics Anonymous meetings a week (I chair Friday meetings), I attend as many online meetings as I can (usually 4-5 a week, sometimes every day), I have a sponsor, I'm working the steps (on Step 2), and I see an addictions counselor once a month. I also try to keep in contact with other recovering addicts as much as I can, and read our Basic Text in my free time. I wish I could get her to work recovery like I do, but I can't. Not saying I'm perfect, but if she would put meetings first like she puts her friends first, it would help a lot.
Anybody else in a similar situation? I'll admit, when I realized how bad it was getting there were a few days where I wanted to drink/smoke a joint, but I white-knuckled it and made it through. This is going to sound preachy, but I'm very grateful for my fellowship (NA).
I'm wondering if there are any other recovering addicts on here that are affected by another addict.
I'll have 90 days clean on September 22nd (also my 26th birthday!), and my younger sister is still in active addiction. She uses my DOC's (hydro's, oxy's) but she's also dabbled in Meth as I've found out recently. The hardest part about all of this is the fact that she has a young child, whose father is currently in jail for theft (the genius was caught on camera). I'm currently, along with my parents, taking steps to ensure that the child is taken care of (custody).
She's given us the same old merry-go-round story for the past couple months - how she needs to get clean because her life is such a mess. I've tried talking to her about how I feel, but then she goes on a sob story, so I've stopped that - I just give her tough love if I need to talk to her. Actions speak louder than words, and I can honestly say I don't think she's ready to get clean yet and be a productive parent. I hope she proves me wrong, I really do.. but I was at that stage where I wasn't ready to fully get clean yet, either. I recognize the signs. At this point we barely talk, because either she's with her new "boyfriend", she's bitchy, or she's just not at home.
Right now, I attend 2 face2face Narcotics Anonymous meetings a week (I chair Friday meetings), I attend as many online meetings as I can (usually 4-5 a week, sometimes every day), I have a sponsor, I'm working the steps (on Step 2), and I see an addictions counselor once a month. I also try to keep in contact with other recovering addicts as much as I can, and read our Basic Text in my free time. I wish I could get her to work recovery like I do, but I can't. Not saying I'm perfect, but if she would put meetings first like she puts her friends first, it would help a lot.
Anybody else in a similar situation? I'll admit, when I realized how bad it was getting there were a few days where I wanted to drink/smoke a joint, but I white-knuckled it and made it through. This is going to sound preachy, but I'm very grateful for my fellowship (NA).
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
We have many "double winners" here, those who are in recovery for substance and also for codependency and I'm sure they will be along to share how it was and is for them.
Congratulations on your sobriety and for reaching out on this side too.
Take a good read around and you will see that you are not alone here.
Hugs
Congratulations on your sobriety and for reaching out on this side too.
Take a good read around and you will see that you are not alone here.
Hugs
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
An early Happy Birthday to you. 26? You're just a kid...
While I'm not what Ann calls a "double winner", I would still caution you when it comes to dealing with your sister. I'm thankful that you're doing well, and I would like to see you to continue to do well. That may mean, unfortunately, being some distance between you and your sister. Your health comes first, so don't think twice about giving yourself permission to think of your continued recovery first.
Best of luck to you, and God speed.
While I'm not what Ann calls a "double winner", I would still caution you when it comes to dealing with your sister. I'm thankful that you're doing well, and I would like to see you to continue to do well. That may mean, unfortunately, being some distance between you and your sister. Your health comes first, so don't think twice about giving yourself permission to think of your continued recovery first.
Best of luck to you, and God speed.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Ft. Wayne, IN
Posts: 1
I am here because of my sister as well. She has been battling drugs and alcohol for over 35 years. She had been doing so well and I don't know what happened but she has relapsed and my family is the state of Flux now. My other siblings and I are trying to keep it from my mother but I am not too sure how long we can do that. Sigh....at my wits end now. I believe I am going to start going to some local meetings for families if they have them.
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