Water balloon
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Alaska
Posts: 223
Water balloon
So I'm at my X's sisters house--a joint birthday party for some nieces and a nephew. The kids are all playing with balloons and my X had a water balloon. I thought surely he won't get me, he's not talking to me. Nope. Wrong. He got me. And himself more. I heard people saying my name, and I was shaking my head, but he was behind me and I didn't think he would do it.
So his sisters standing by all said, "That's so f*****d up." He came up and grabbed my head and hair and I said, "ow, F***!" And walked off.
A few minutes later he came up and tried putting his arm around me and pulling me in for a hug and I pulled away. I said, "Do you want me to play back that message you left last time you talked I me?"
(For those of you who haven't been following he left a two minute voicemail that he's done with me, I'm nothing more than an X, he'll keep it civil around the family but stay away.)
He said, "well I'm trying to be nice here at the party, but if you want me to be a d*** I will be." I just said, "well I'm a little confused here. You're giving me mixed signals." A sister said "Don't start arguing here." And we each left it at that. I'm mostly sure she meant that for him, because I'm not an argued and don't like arguing in front of people anyways.
And then his, well almost his whole family, had all either said what a jerk or they're sorry or do I want a dry shirt to wear.
Anyways, I know this is a stupid reason to post but I'm so confused? This isn't being nice at the family function. I don't know what the heck.
I did overhear him earlier he can't wait to be off probation so he can smoke weed. (He loves weed. It calms him down. Really. He's never been able to smoke around me but the general consensus from the family is it really relaxes him. Yikes. Already wanting to get high.)
Gah. Just wanted to vent I guess. I'm still here. I'm going to go join the family now.
So his sisters standing by all said, "That's so f*****d up." He came up and grabbed my head and hair and I said, "ow, F***!" And walked off.
A few minutes later he came up and tried putting his arm around me and pulling me in for a hug and I pulled away. I said, "Do you want me to play back that message you left last time you talked I me?"
(For those of you who haven't been following he left a two minute voicemail that he's done with me, I'm nothing more than an X, he'll keep it civil around the family but stay away.)
He said, "well I'm trying to be nice here at the party, but if you want me to be a d*** I will be." I just said, "well I'm a little confused here. You're giving me mixed signals." A sister said "Don't start arguing here." And we each left it at that. I'm mostly sure she meant that for him, because I'm not an argued and don't like arguing in front of people anyways.
And then his, well almost his whole family, had all either said what a jerk or they're sorry or do I want a dry shirt to wear.
Anyways, I know this is a stupid reason to post but I'm so confused? This isn't being nice at the family function. I don't know what the heck.
I did overhear him earlier he can't wait to be off probation so he can smoke weed. (He loves weed. It calms him down. Really. He's never been able to smoke around me but the general consensus from the family is it really relaxes him. Yikes. Already wanting to get high.)
Gah. Just wanted to vent I guess. I'm still here. I'm going to go join the family now.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I think that was mean and humiliating and yes, he's a jerk and a half...and at a children's party no less.
Don't be confused, he's trying to manipulate you and control you and show his power over you...a jerk in the worst way.
Rise above this and put him on no contact, leaving verbally abusive messages and treating you like that is not what you need in your life and you don't have to put up with it, not for one moment longer. Just say bye bye.
Hugs
Don't be confused, he's trying to manipulate you and control you and show his power over you...a jerk in the worst way.
Rise above this and put him on no contact, leaving verbally abusive messages and treating you like that is not what you need in your life and you don't have to put up with it, not for one moment longer. Just say bye bye.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: My Happy Place
Posts: 700
I really do get you are close with his family, but in the future maybe limit the appearances if you know he is going to be present. Too much drama right now.
Send a card and wait until you both have had some space before any personal
one on ones, my opinion of course.
It is HIS family.
Send a card and wait until you both have had some space before any personal
one on ones, my opinion of course.
It is HIS family.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Alaska
Posts: 223
Thanks, all.
I think his action spoke for itself. He made himself look like the jerk.
Yes. It is very hard to pull away from his family, but I do appreciate how they are his family, just as Sungrl said. As it turns out, my family member who recently had a kidney transplant is still in early recovery, and I have to limit my exposure around children because I am in the same household. So I've got about a month to cool off with the family. I speak with his older sister on the phone, and text his younger sister often. So no need to crash his visits with them. Just like I said, very hard for me. I knew most of them before my X and got very close while he was incarcerated. Even took in some of the nieces and nephews for a few weeks during a family emergency. And as I've said, I work with his dad on weekends and he and I are very close friends. We know better than to talk too much about X. His dads been through the same thing in his own life. I can see the sadness in his eyes. And pity. For both of is. His son, who's going through this, and for me getting hurt. (He thinks I'm the best thing that's ever happened to his son, except for his child).
Well he didn't totally ruin my day. The kids had fun, and that's why we were there.
And I bought a brand spanking new shiny computer yesterday. So boo on him! Haha
Thanks again, all.
I think his action spoke for itself. He made himself look like the jerk.
Yes. It is very hard to pull away from his family, but I do appreciate how they are his family, just as Sungrl said. As it turns out, my family member who recently had a kidney transplant is still in early recovery, and I have to limit my exposure around children because I am in the same household. So I've got about a month to cool off with the family. I speak with his older sister on the phone, and text his younger sister often. So no need to crash his visits with them. Just like I said, very hard for me. I knew most of them before my X and got very close while he was incarcerated. Even took in some of the nieces and nephews for a few weeks during a family emergency. And as I've said, I work with his dad on weekends and he and I are very close friends. We know better than to talk too much about X. His dads been through the same thing in his own life. I can see the sadness in his eyes. And pity. For both of is. His son, who's going through this, and for me getting hurt. (He thinks I'm the best thing that's ever happened to his son, except for his child).
Well he didn't totally ruin my day. The kids had fun, and that's why we were there.
And I bought a brand spanking new shiny computer yesterday. So boo on him! Haha
Thanks again, all.
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