It's been a while
 

I'm still trying to divorce the opiate addict that I was married to. We have lived very far apart for a year now, and everything has been made difficult as far as the divorce is concerned. I was told a ton of information yesterday and today about the past year of the addict. The addict of course denied and hid all of the truth, and today, I was blamed for the addict's drug use because I made his life so miserable. It brought the pain right back. All I could do was tell him that I tried my best, I loved him my best and that all I want is happiness for him. The awful things he said still cut to the core and I had a good cry, but that's all I'm going to allow. Hearing him sound like a lawyer arguing every detail, turning all the tables etc. was pretty painful. He wasn't ever lying because he never said he wasn't using etc. We all have that glimmer of hope that they will stay clean, and sometimes unfortunately that just isn't the case. Trying not to let it get the best of me, and trying not to stoop or play into all the mean things spewing from his brain. It has gotten easier to deal with, but you never get over the disappointment when they turn cruel.

>>>>but you never get over the disappointment when they turn cruel.<<<<

We're so sorry you have to go through this. Best wishes and warm hugs.

Thanks Vale. Think it just hit at a vulnerable time. Lost my job and making a new career for myself. Not like I didn't have enough doubts! I know better than to listen to the addict, detaching with love, told him I did the best I could do etc. and all I want is happiness for him. Going no contact again. Soberrecovery has been a massive help throughout all of this.