Amysad

I feel like I am starting to breathe again- haven't spoken with my AD since Monday but I realize that her life is up to her- rehabs six times, rapid detox 1x but still no changes for her. BUT - I AM changing..... I embarrassing that I need to take care of me and that the greatest help I can provide is to let her know I love her but that this is her choice not mine. Whether she changes or not remains to be seen but I am forever changed and will not waiver and allow the manipulation back into my life. I almost allowed her addiction choice to kill me too and that has changed- thanks SR......it's not easy but it's getting easier every day

chicory

Amy, I am glad you are feeling better.
seems that sometimes, doing the right things does make us feel less anxiety. usually it seems opposite, to me.

I hope she comes to her senses and finds recovery.. i am glad you are finding yours now.

Ann

I am glad you were able to save yourself, Amy, I too almost died trying to save my son.

The thing is, they are not ours to save or fix, that has to come from them. Even giving our own lives will not save theirs. So we choose life, and healthier choices and a better path....and maybe one day they will see our light and realize that their own light can guide them to a better life.

Keeping your daughter in my prayers.

Hugs

Amysad

I wish I had learned this so much earlier - so much of the last ten years has been spent by me crying, bring scared, worried, carrying my phone around like a crazy person. The stress and the overall aging I did to myself is just inexcusable and the wasted money only kept her in using mode. Someone asked me if I miss her and I told them I feel now that clarity has sunk in that I haven't known her or really have even seen her for years. I feel now like I lost her 10 years ago and the person in her place is someone else - someone I never knew, never gave birth to, never loved and never loved us.

GardenMama

Oh boy, have I been there, and I have no illusions I may be there again someday. I am glad you are seeing things in a new light--it is a powerful thing. Please don't dwell on the past ten years if it makes you sad and frustrated. You are where you are right now, and that is in a place of healing yourself. Try to just be in that place now. I have a lot of resentments & regret during the past 7 years with my AD to pull up at any time, but it just makes me feel so down when I do. Try to be present, hard as it is. I will keep you and your AD in my prayers for whatever is best for you all. Take care.

Ilovemysonjj

Dear Amy, we parents (Moms for sure!) carry the burden so much longer and deeper! It is a relief to go on with our lives even if our children are choosing to remain active in their addiction. Sending you virtual hugs and support.
Hugs!
TT