This has got to end..

Old 06-21-2014, 05:08 PM
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Angry This has got to end..

So It has been awhile since I've been here. Thought things were going So-So. Well it all hit the fan today and I told my AH to pack his things and get out.. I found out on his google play account (I warned him before that if he spent another cent he was out) that since late march he has spent over $3,000.00 on FAKE poker. FAKE POKER. Mind you his DOC is Oxy/ Heroin. So... of couse he has been using also. Now in two days he has spent over $500.00 out of our account on FAKE POKER!!! Can I emphasize FAKE enough??! On the phone.. really??? SO STUPID> Meanwhile, I then talk to his father and find out more crap.. cash from work that he did not contribute to the family.. so of course it is GONZO. there is another 1500.00 this week. He is like a sliced ventricle...just bleeding cash everywhere. Then he tries to turn this around on me.. no not the drugs.. but "Try to explain to the kids why you threw me out for a phone app" REALLY?! Is that what it is about? NOt the MASSIVE amount of our money your blowing up your nose and on useless FAKE POKER> this is totally insane. Then he guilts me and tries to act like I'm greedy or something. I'm sorry but for how much he makes OUR HOUSE should BE FINNISHED or at least have some work done... We need a lot of things done. Our kids are 4 and 6.. I'm sure that could be used better!!@!
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Old 06-21-2014, 05:26 PM
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So sorry you're dealing with this. I highly suggest you open a bank account in your name only (preferably at a different bank) and move most of the money from your joint account into your personal account. All it would take would be one ATM transaction or one visit to the bank for him to wipe out your joint account.
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Old 06-21-2014, 07:46 PM
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Ann
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I agree, salvage whatever you can and set it out of his reach and take your name off anything that could bring you bad credit.

He is out of control, in denial and he has left you in a very bad position, financially and emotionally.

Can his dad talk to him about getting help, since he's not listening to you?

Is there a Gambler's Anonymous near you? It has helped many who are gambling away their homes and their families.

I am so sorry you are going through this and hope you can keep yourself from sinking with him.

Hugs
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Old 06-21-2014, 08:02 PM
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Wow, I am so sorry. This would make me furious too.

Dont let him blame you for one minute. He needs some help, big time. Protecting your money is paramount as Suki said.

I can feel your anger and frustration. do you have a meeting you attend? maybe some face to face.
Bless your heart. I hope things get better for you, no matter what you decide. Take care of you, and the babies.
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Old 06-21-2014, 08:22 PM
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Wow--you wrote a post about his poker issue in 2006!

Please protect yourself and your financial situation.
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Old 06-22-2014, 05:47 AM
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Nothing to add, really. You made the right call booting his arse to the curb.

Hold firm on your boundaries, and by firm I mean FIRM.
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Old 06-22-2014, 10:10 AM
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"I told my AH to pack his things and get out.. I found out on his google play account (I warned him before that if he spent another cent he was out)"

It sounds like you have followed through on your consequence. I have been very guilty of throwing away my "emotional sobriety" over the actions of someone else. When I look at my part in it I usually realize that I knew exactly who/what I was dealing with but just wanted it to be different. I would set boundaries and then get SO upset/incensed when a behavior occurred. I FINALLY realized that I could save myself a whole lot of upset if I only ahered to my boundaries and the consequences I put into place.

How come people do what they do? Because they have issues. And when you are dealing with an addict - insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
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Old 06-22-2014, 10:27 AM
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Cant really add to what everyone else has said but wanted you to know how sorry I am for what you have to deal with and agree 100% get the cash out ASAP and put into a safe account with your name only and take his name off any credit cards with your name as well...............or call and get rid of them if you have to!
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