Call Probation Officer On Addict?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Washington, NJ
Posts: 49
Call Probation Officer On Addict?
Does anyone have any experience with a probation officer and their addict?
My boyfriend, who is a former heroin addict, came out of rehab and is now drinking heavily and at least using coke and prescription pills and pot. I asked him to leave the house two weeks ago.
He denies he is using drugs (even though I have sources who have confirmed it), but says he's only drinking and that's OK to him.
Anyway -- I know he is a danger to himself and others, because he's also drinking and driving.
He is on probation for a previous possession of heroin charge until October 2014.
Is it wrong to call his probation officer and report that he moved and he now has a diff. phone number, etc.? Do I tell her he's possibly using drugs too?
Half of my friends tell me to do it because I could be saving his life, but others say to let him cause his own problems.
What does everyone think I should do?
My boyfriend, who is a former heroin addict, came out of rehab and is now drinking heavily and at least using coke and prescription pills and pot. I asked him to leave the house two weeks ago.
He denies he is using drugs (even though I have sources who have confirmed it), but says he's only drinking and that's OK to him.
Anyway -- I know he is a danger to himself and others, because he's also drinking and driving.
He is on probation for a previous possession of heroin charge until October 2014.
Is it wrong to call his probation officer and report that he moved and he now has a diff. phone number, etc.? Do I tell her he's possibly using drugs too?
Half of my friends tell me to do it because I could be saving his life, but others say to let him cause his own problems.
What does everyone think I should do?
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,618
yes. IMO. we call that being the Codie police. The probation officer will catch him. That much is certain. My AH was on probation, used, went to rehab on his own, used, got ordered to rehab, used, and now is in prison.
I am in recovery to and over the holidays I wa struggling trying to go cold turkey and he would call me on the phone every day saying "baby, you don't want to be here where I am. It's not if... it's when."
I would recommend you just have a conversation with yourself.
Are you ok with having an active addict in your life? Can you accept him the way he is? Do you want to sit back and wait and see what happens?
There are meetings for family members called Al anon and Nar anon that will help you not feel like you are the only one. The stickie at the top of this forum are a good place to start as well.
hugs. you are not alone.
I am in recovery to and over the holidays I wa struggling trying to go cold turkey and he would call me on the phone every day saying "baby, you don't want to be here where I am. It's not if... it's when."
I would recommend you just have a conversation with yourself.
Are you ok with having an active addict in your life? Can you accept him the way he is? Do you want to sit back and wait and see what happens?
There are meetings for family members called Al anon and Nar anon that will help you not feel like you are the only one. The stickie at the top of this forum are a good place to start as well.
hugs. you are not alone.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: AZ
Posts: 309
IMO, it feels like control if you contact his PO. I think they should experience their own demise on their own. We cannot or should not help them to thier rock bottom, otherwise they will not have the opportunity to learn. They will only have the opportunity to blame. I just have decided not to mess with my HP's plan. All in good time.
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
What does everyone think I should do?
Stay out of his way, and allow whatever is supposed to happen to him happen. That means not inserting yourself between him and his probation officer.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: East Coast of Florida
Posts: 61
You have received excellent advice. You don't need to do a thing.
Have just gone through this with my DA daughter. It took two months of being on community control/probation for her to end herself back in jail. One day her PO showed up unexpectedly and she accused me of calling. I told her I didn't, and didn't plan to, but not to call me when she got arrested and sent back to jail. And she hasn't.
Have just gone through this with my DA daughter. It took two months of being on community control/probation for her to end herself back in jail. One day her PO showed up unexpectedly and she accused me of calling. I told her I didn't, and didn't plan to, but not to call me when she got arrested and sent back to jail. And she hasn't.
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
Drinking and driving is everyone's business. I have often seen it recommended here to call the police about that.
I did phone my stepson's probation officer after long deliberations with his father.
I have never felt badly about it. He was out of control and we feel it probably saved his life.
And no, I never did take a front row seat to his drama. I don't think it was a codie decision at all. I would to it again.
I did phone my stepson's probation officer after long deliberations with his father.
I have never felt badly about it. He was out of control and we feel it probably saved his life.
And no, I never did take a front row seat to his drama. I don't think it was a codie decision at all. I would to it again.
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