Gerrysgirl

Today was a very rough day. I finally let the rest of my AS's family know that he has been using again for over a year. There was a lot of shock and disbelief, questions directed to me as to "how did I know" and was I sure. Then came the deluge of emails from my son. . . Very hard to read but I tried to remember the wise words I have read here . . .i found little comfort, as his words were so hurtful. The last email I got I didn't read, I didn't have the heart to. He has blamed all of us for his addiction and now it is my fault that everyone is angry with him. I just feel like crap. I have to distance myself but it's so hard when I worry about him all day long.

When does it get easier? How do you get to the point where the words don't cut you up? Will there come a time when I won't be obsessed about his life? I guess time is the remedy. . . But I wonder how much time he has?

Hekate

Hello Gerrysgirl...I am new here but just wanted to send warm hugs to you. I also have an addicted son, over 10 years now of serious IV opiate use. It can get better for you. I have had my own relapses right along with his, when I forgot to care for myself. I just did it again the past year or so...working my way back to me now. My son lived on the street and ate of out dumpsters for a year and so many other terrible things...and he was mean, nasty and not responsible for anything. I just tried to love him from a distance and was able to practice meditation and yoga to be able to be peaceful...and it helped so much. Although he is still struggling, he is better now, he is making progress on his journey and finally is taking some responsibility.
Hang in there! And, be good to you...

Raider

I'm very sorry.