Ugh.......mad at myself
The addict I cared about knew she had my best wishes to the end.
I am not ashamed of that......nor will I ever be.
I did stop supporting the addiction----and I told her why. I told her
that addiction had taken her home, her husband, her family, and in
the end (in all likelihood)...her life....but that it would not take my
respect for the core person that she was-----and God willing..
..would be again someday.
Someday never came. But then again----the devil only went home
with 99%. The devil wanted every last person she knew to hate, loathe, and
disrespect her.
He failed.
I am happy to say that evil did NOT triumph. Nothing makes one's
day like spitting in the eye of the devil.
No Mom worthy of the title will EVER give up on her child. They will
pray every day....to whatever God they choose----that their child
will find their way home to life. That's not 'codependency'---
that's LIFE.
I am not ashamed of that......nor will I ever be.
I did stop supporting the addiction----and I told her why. I told her
that addiction had taken her home, her husband, her family, and in
the end (in all likelihood)...her life....but that it would not take my
respect for the core person that she was-----and God willing..
..would be again someday.
Someday never came. But then again----the devil only went home
with 99%. The devil wanted every last person she knew to hate, loathe, and
disrespect her.
He failed.
I am happy to say that evil did NOT triumph. Nothing makes one's
day like spitting in the eye of the devil.
No Mom worthy of the title will EVER give up on her child. They will
pray every day....to whatever God they choose----that their child
will find their way home to life. That's not 'codependency'---
that's LIFE.
I was reading something this week end, a dad was talking to his daughter, similar situation. He said it is ok to show them that you care and support them and that they know you are there (within your boundaries), just don't tell them what to do, because they only see the "control" not the caring.
You did what any loving parent does, the heart want what the heart wants. (that is probably a quote from somewhere, dunno). Give yourself the same mercy that you have given to me in the short time here.
Thank you for sharing, I thought with your caring so highly developed that you might be close to walking on water. It helps to know that even with your wisdom, the story continues as for us all.
You did what any loving parent does, the heart want what the heart wants. (that is probably a quote from somewhere, dunno). Give yourself the same mercy that you have given to me in the short time here.
Thank you for sharing, I thought with your caring so highly developed that you might be close to walking on water. It helps to know that even with your wisdom, the story continues as for us all.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Colorado
Posts: 577
Yes, thank you Vale. There are days I feel like I spend the entire day praying, handing my son over, knowing God has a plan. It's trying to maintain hope and faith that I struggle with...So I start all over again. Wrapping my son in a blanket of love and light...asking God to guide him, asking for the right people to appear in his life at the right time, rinse and repeat...over and over. I hope someday I will simply trust, without questioning anything. Baby stepping....
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)