Watching my son dying
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Coconut Creek, Florida
Posts: 4
Watching my son dying
I look in his eyes..and they are no longer there. I am so helpless in this battle to save my son. He is now 35 and has a battle with different addictions for almost half his life. From pot to cocaine to opiates, not to mention addicted to power, success and money. I am watching his children, his dreams and his will to live go down the tubes. I am always waiting for the call that he has passed. His addiction has affected all that love him. I am on disability due to depression. I am trying this forum to reach out. I am so isolated as I cannot go to anyone about this problem. I have shunned all friends and family members do not know. I feel like a failure as I do not know what else to do..
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 220
I'm so sorry for what has brought you here.
One of the loved ones that caused me to seek help here is in prison for a long time now, and the other is dying. It is heartbreaking.
There is help for you here. I am ok now. Please stay, and read the stickies at the top of the forum.
Take good care of yourself.
Hugs to you.
One of the loved ones that caused me to seek help here is in prison for a long time now, and the other is dying. It is heartbreaking.
There is help for you here. I am ok now. Please stay, and read the stickies at the top of the forum.
Take good care of yourself.
Hugs to you.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: WA
Posts: 124
It's the hardest thing...having to sit back and watch our adult children slowly take their own lives. And there really is nothing we can do, other than be there when they decide to get help...and THAT is totally up to them and only them.
As far as how to help yourself - the worst thing I did was to keep my daughter's secret. We never felt ashamed as her parents. Or worried about what the world thought of US. What we DID feel was the urge to keep her safe from herself - meaning, if her family and friends knew, it would be that much harder for her to drag herself back from the abyss, because she would now have the shame to deal with.
WRONG.
It only served to alienate us from those who cared about and loved us. We felt isolated, terribly cut-off, absolutely alone. We had no where to turn for OUR support because no one knew our situation. It was depressing and completely hopeless.
When we finally blurted out the horrendous heartache we were in the midst of, our friends and family were SHOCKED. They had no idea our girl was in such a bad way. (She started her addiction at 25.) But we felt the heavy burden lifting, and sensed the prayers of those who loved us, and realized that we were doing exactly what we wanted HER to do: asking for help.
The best way to start to heal your heart is to let go of the shame and the thought that keeping his secret is your duty. It will, literally, start to kill you. Reach out to a trusted friend, Pastor or family member. Don't worry about the "backlash", if there is any. That's THEIR problem. Just the act of letting it go, speaking the truth, will relieve some of the stress from your heart. It's not your secret to carry, and getting on with your own healing has the potential to help your son in ways you may not even be aware of.
As far as how to help yourself - the worst thing I did was to keep my daughter's secret. We never felt ashamed as her parents. Or worried about what the world thought of US. What we DID feel was the urge to keep her safe from herself - meaning, if her family and friends knew, it would be that much harder for her to drag herself back from the abyss, because she would now have the shame to deal with.
WRONG.
It only served to alienate us from those who cared about and loved us. We felt isolated, terribly cut-off, absolutely alone. We had no where to turn for OUR support because no one knew our situation. It was depressing and completely hopeless.
When we finally blurted out the horrendous heartache we were in the midst of, our friends and family were SHOCKED. They had no idea our girl was in such a bad way. (She started her addiction at 25.) But we felt the heavy burden lifting, and sensed the prayers of those who loved us, and realized that we were doing exactly what we wanted HER to do: asking for help.
The best way to start to heal your heart is to let go of the shame and the thought that keeping his secret is your duty. It will, literally, start to kill you. Reach out to a trusted friend, Pastor or family member. Don't worry about the "backlash", if there is any. That's THEIR problem. Just the act of letting it go, speaking the truth, will relieve some of the stress from your heart. It's not your secret to carry, and getting on with your own healing has the potential to help your son in ways you may not even be aware of.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Welcome to SR....although I'm so sorry for what brings you here.
My son is an addict....struggling.....wants to be sober but doesn't want to give it up.....all at the same time. It is hard.
You've come to a good place. A place where everyone understands what you are going through. You are not alone.
I first came to SR at my own bottom. I had reached such a low point myself.....his addiction wasn't only killing him.....it was killing me too. I was in mourning.....mourning someone who was still alive. A lot of things have happened in the past several years. My son has had periods of sobriety.....times that I cherish. But most importantly I have found acceptance and compassion and joy. Some might call it finding peace in the midst of chaos.
I hope you stick around. There are many here who can share their experience, strength and hope with you. The isolation, shame, guilt, and fear can be overcome.
gentle hugs
ke
My son is an addict....struggling.....wants to be sober but doesn't want to give it up.....all at the same time. It is hard.
You've come to a good place. A place where everyone understands what you are going through. You are not alone.
I first came to SR at my own bottom. I had reached such a low point myself.....his addiction wasn't only killing him.....it was killing me too. I was in mourning.....mourning someone who was still alive. A lot of things have happened in the past several years. My son has had periods of sobriety.....times that I cherish. But most importantly I have found acceptance and compassion and joy. Some might call it finding peace in the midst of chaos.
I hope you stick around. There are many here who can share their experience, strength and hope with you. The isolation, shame, guilt, and fear can be overcome.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 198
I know that feeling. So sorry for what you are going through. You are not a failure. Stick around. There are so many people here who understand. This is a wonderful site. Also, if there are no Nar-anon meetings in your area, there is a Nar-Anon forum with online meetings. Take care.
happy, joyous an free!
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: northeast
Posts: 693
So very sorry for your pain. Please stick around SR, it is an amazing place of healing and hope. I'm new to the site yet in a fairly short time so much of my own pain has been lifted and I am not so alone.
You are not a failure. As a parent with an addicted son I too know how hard it is to separate my pain from his, my struggles from his, my helping from his addiction/recovery. This site has helped me begin to separate from all of that which belongs to him and find healing and relief for all that is mine.
His addiction is his, my son's. Yes it has made me sick in the process in so many ways, but SR and al anon and working on my pain and sharing my struggles with others is beginning to let light back into my life.
You really have come to a good place. The stickies and many of the forums are incredible reading for the soul. You are not alone anymore. Welcome and congrats for reaching out.
You are not a failure. As a parent with an addicted son I too know how hard it is to separate my pain from his, my struggles from his, my helping from his addiction/recovery. This site has helped me begin to separate from all of that which belongs to him and find healing and relief for all that is mine.
His addiction is his, my son's. Yes it has made me sick in the process in so many ways, but SR and al anon and working on my pain and sharing my struggles with others is beginning to let light back into my life.
You really have come to a good place. The stickies and many of the forums are incredible reading for the soul. You are not alone anymore. Welcome and congrats for reaching out.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: TX
Posts: 731
I think as parents of addict children we have all felt guilty at one point.
You aren't a failure and as adults they are making their own decisions.
I don't shout to the world that my kids have had issues. To those close to me...they know and care about me. I don't keep my kids secrets. I can't as it has made me sick to do so.
I am glad that you are here....
You aren't a failure and as adults they are making their own decisions.
I don't shout to the world that my kids have had issues. To those close to me...they know and care about me. I don't keep my kids secrets. I can't as it has made me sick to do so.
I am glad that you are here....
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Originally Posted by YouWillBe 
It's the hardest thing...having to sit back and watch our adult children slowly take their own lives. And there really is nothing we can do, other than be there when they decide to get help...and THAT is totally up to them and only them.
As far as how to help yourself - the worst thing I did was to keep my daughter's secret. We never felt ashamed as her parents. Or worried about what the world thought of US. What we DID feel was the urge to keep her safe from herself - meaning, if her family and friends knew, it would be that much harder for her to drag herself back from the abyss, because she would now have the shame to deal with.
WRONG.
It only served to alienate us from those who cared about and loved us. We felt isolated, terribly cut-off, absolutely alone. We had no where to turn for OUR support because no one knew our situation. It was depressing and completely hopeless.
When we finally blurted out the horrendous heartache we were in the midst of, our friends and family were SHOCKED. They had no idea our girl was in such a bad way. (She started her addiction at 25.) But we felt the heavy burden lifting, and sensed the prayers of those who loved us, and realized that we were doing exactly what we wanted HER to do: asking for help.
The best way to start to heal your heart is to let go of the shame and the thought that keeping his secret is your duty. It will, literally, start to kill you. Reach out to a trusted friend, Pastor or family member. Don't worry about the "backlash", if there is any. That's THEIR problem. Just the act of letting it go, speaking the truth, will relieve some of the stress from your heart. It's not your secret to carry, and getting on with your own healing has the potential to help your son in ways you may not even be aware of.
As far as how to help yourself - the worst thing I did was to keep my daughter's secret. We never felt ashamed as her parents. Or worried about what the world thought of US. What we DID feel was the urge to keep her safe from herself - meaning, if her family and friends knew, it would be that much harder for her to drag herself back from the abyss, because she would now have the shame to deal with.
WRONG.
It only served to alienate us from those who cared about and loved us. We felt isolated, terribly cut-off, absolutely alone. We had no where to turn for OUR support because no one knew our situation. It was depressing and completely hopeless.
When we finally blurted out the horrendous heartache we were in the midst of, our friends and family were SHOCKED. They had no idea our girl was in such a bad way. (She started her addiction at 25.) But we felt the heavy burden lifting, and sensed the prayers of those who loved us, and realized that we were doing exactly what we wanted HER to do: asking for help.
The best way to start to heal your heart is to let go of the shame and the thought that keeping his secret is your duty. It will, literally, start to kill you. Reach out to a trusted friend, Pastor or family member. Don't worry about the "backlash", if there is any. That's THEIR problem. Just the act of letting it go, speaking the truth, will relieve some of the stress from your heart. It's not your secret to carry, and getting on with your own healing has the potential to help your son in ways you may not even be aware of.
Shaynaschilc, I hope you stick around. there is much wisdom and compassion here, and that is priceless and can help you.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
You are not responsible for your son. He has to want recovery for himself and until he does there is nothing any single person can do to help him, including you.
All of this covering up and isolating yourself is making it so much worse for you. The day I admitted my husband was an addict, it freed me in so many ways. You deserve a support system. You deserve the love of your family and frinds. The thing that surprised me is that most of them knew anyways.
Addiction can be a long and lonley road. Alot of times it is more lonley for the family than for the addict themselves. Please please go to support meetings, get thyself to therapy and stop hiding his problems in the closet. You cannot control his actions, but you can control your own reaction.
Remember the 3 C's:
You did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it.
God Bless.
All of this covering up and isolating yourself is making it so much worse for you. The day I admitted my husband was an addict, it freed me in so many ways. You deserve a support system. You deserve the love of your family and frinds. The thing that surprised me is that most of them knew anyways.
Addiction can be a long and lonley road. Alot of times it is more lonley for the family than for the addict themselves. Please please go to support meetings, get thyself to therapy and stop hiding his problems in the closet. You cannot control his actions, but you can control your own reaction.
Remember the 3 C's:
You did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it.
God Bless.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Coconut Creek, Florida
Posts: 4
Thank you for your comments. I wanted to let you know that I do not withhold my son's condition from family because of shame. I recognize addiction as an illness. My father was addicted to gambling, my brother addicted to food, I was addicted to love and my son is very addicted to everything. He is addicted to success, money, and now pills. I don't share this information because my son is so messed up in his head that he cannot admit he is addicted. He still lies that he even is taking pills. It has been well over 5 years now. His son is a heart transplant recipient . He got his heart when he was 6 weeks old. He is now 14 and his kidneys are shot. We are praying for him to get on the transplant list again. I believe my son hides his emotions by using pain killers. Yes, I am angry because I know he is only concerned for himself and his feelings, but I am so mad that he is not there for his son and family. He believes being a provider is doing his job but he is on overload with the pills he will lose it all.
Our family members, other than his brother and father, do not know. My son thinks he has everyone fooled but a few family members have told me he has called and sounds like he is all over the place. I think they dismiss it as stress. My son has to run 3 businesses because of his excesses..all of them. He currently has a staph infection that is all over his face and back. His latest break out he told me he looked on the internet and he has rheumatic fever. He is sure of it, but of course will not seek medical treatment. His wife is planning to kick him out (which should had been done years ago). I am sick with grief but have not called or contacted him. I will wait in hopes he will reach out for help before he dies or loses everything. He has always been a control freak but finally found something he cannot control.
As a mother it is devastating to watch this talented, intelligent and so blessed man throw his life away. I know he does not want to be this person he sees in the mirror but has no idea how to stop.
His Father does not talk to him and now his brother just left the state because he can no longer watch what he is doing to himself. With his wife leaving him there is only me and he has decided not to talk to me either. Just said he his really depressed.
I am in Florida and was a part of a group of Mothers that rallied to make changes and close some of the Pain Clinics in South Florida. We pressured our governor to make the changes. A lot has been done yet somehow these people still manager to get their hands on opiates any way they can. My son does se a doctor who prescribed siboxen (sp) and sleeping pills..and who knows what else..but I have witnessed very bazaar and scarey behavior that I do not believe are the results from these meds.
I do seek counseling but I guess I want to hear a success story somewhere to feel some hope. Thanks again to everyone's input.
Our family members, other than his brother and father, do not know. My son thinks he has everyone fooled but a few family members have told me he has called and sounds like he is all over the place. I think they dismiss it as stress. My son has to run 3 businesses because of his excesses..all of them. He currently has a staph infection that is all over his face and back. His latest break out he told me he looked on the internet and he has rheumatic fever. He is sure of it, but of course will not seek medical treatment. His wife is planning to kick him out (which should had been done years ago). I am sick with grief but have not called or contacted him. I will wait in hopes he will reach out for help before he dies or loses everything. He has always been a control freak but finally found something he cannot control.
As a mother it is devastating to watch this talented, intelligent and so blessed man throw his life away. I know he does not want to be this person he sees in the mirror but has no idea how to stop.
His Father does not talk to him and now his brother just left the state because he can no longer watch what he is doing to himself. With his wife leaving him there is only me and he has decided not to talk to me either. Just said he his really depressed.
I am in Florida and was a part of a group of Mothers that rallied to make changes and close some of the Pain Clinics in South Florida. We pressured our governor to make the changes. A lot has been done yet somehow these people still manager to get their hands on opiates any way they can. My son does se a doctor who prescribed siboxen (sp) and sleeping pills..and who knows what else..but I have witnessed very bazaar and scarey behavior that I do not believe are the results from these meds.
I do seek counseling but I guess I want to hear a success story somewhere to feel some hope. Thanks again to everyone's input.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Arizona
Posts: 64
You'll have to cut off all support and contact until he enters treatment. Call a meeting with the people who are closest to him and have any influence in his life, and ask them to do the same. That is standard option to deal with this situation. You can either support (enable) him until he dies, or try to force him into treatment. Create as many consequences to using drugs as you possibly can.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Coconut Creek, Florida
Posts: 4
Originally Posted by hopeful4
You are not responsible for your son. He has to want recovery for himself and until he does there is nothing any single person can do to help him, including you.
All of this covering up and isolating yourself is making it so much worse for you. The day I admitted my husband was an addict, it freed me in so many ways. You deserve a support system. You deserve the love of your family and frinds. The thing that surprised me is that most of them knew anyways.
Addiction can be a long and lonley road. Alot of times it is more lonley for the family than for the addict themselves. Please please go to support meetings, get thyself to therapy and stop hiding his problems in the closet. You cannot control his actions, but you can control your own reaction.
Remember the 3 C's:
You did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it.
God Bless.
All of this covering up and isolating yourself is making it so much worse for you. The day I admitted my husband was an addict, it freed me in so many ways. You deserve a support system. You deserve the love of your family and frinds. The thing that surprised me is that most of them knew anyways.
Addiction can be a long and lonley road. Alot of times it is more lonley for the family than for the addict themselves. Please please go to support meetings, get thyself to therapy and stop hiding his problems in the closet. You cannot control his actions, but you can control your own reaction.
Remember the 3 C's:
You did not cause it, you cannot control it, and you cannot cure it.
God Bless.
I do not know what will wake him up. I know he wants to stop..I know it is beyond his control and he needs rehab and extensive therapy.
He is having all kinds of medical problems now..skin (staph) infection for months. Lives on anti biotics, Sleeplessness and then stays in bed an entire weekend to sleep. This weird body movement thing he does like body spasims.
I am not ignorant to drugs. Growing up in 60's and 70's I have seen it all. I had good friends die from herion and other drug related incidents. I was no angel. I did my experimentation too..My worse time was with Cocaine but recognized it would kill me and just stopped. I only was a social drinker and never liked anything that made me groggy. So I guess I was lucky to not be one of the ones that couldn't stop.
I am not ashamed of my son..I am sad for him. I know it will take him to lose everything and everyone before he either dies or admits to wanting help to change. I am just sad as his mother feeling so helpless and more sad for his 3 kids and wife.
I am trying to find a group to go to. I have done this before when he was a mess with cocaine. He was 19 then..you would think he would learn or know he is just one of those that cannot use anything.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
I am so sorry for your pain, and his. I can't imagine watching this all happen for so long. I am sure there are success stories out there, so hang in there, perhaps consequences will bring him to his senses.
Have you talked to him about your concerns and observations? about his son, and about his perhaps going to rehab ?
Have you talked to him about your concerns and observations? about his son, and about his perhaps going to rehab ?
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
You are right, it does truly suck. Don't be sorry, it is not your actions! I don't know where you are in Florida, but I attend Celebrate Recovery here. It is for anyone who has a hurt, habit, or hangup they want to get help with. So...I don't know anyone who does not have one of those. I go because my husband is an addict and I need support. They have helped me see outside of addiction and what I can do for myself.
Having a grandchild who is affected is horrible. However, you have to face that it may never change. I am so sorry to say that to you, I know it is not what you want to hear. A person can beat a H addiction, but they have to want it...for themselves. You cannot will them to want it. Even when he wants to stop his body is screaming for the drug. H addiction takes long term inpatient treatment. Alot of people try for 30 days and the success rate is very low. However, it is all about the mindset. Until his mindset changes that he needs recovery for his own self...he won't recover.
You deserve support. I know you said you are not hiding it, but why have you not told the truth to those in your family that think it is just stress? I promise you when you open up YOU will feel better because your support system will get wider. You need to be able to talk about this face to face with people who care about you. That is also why you should find meetings, they will provide you with unconditional support from others who are in the same type of situation and can understand.
I commend you for your efforts in Florida. From what I hear Florida is the hotspot of those clinics and it is just awful. Those people should rot for what they are doing.
We are here with you. Please please don't isolate yourself from your family and friends. You need a wide support system that is there for you.
God Bless!
Having a grandchild who is affected is horrible. However, you have to face that it may never change. I am so sorry to say that to you, I know it is not what you want to hear. A person can beat a H addiction, but they have to want it...for themselves. You cannot will them to want it. Even when he wants to stop his body is screaming for the drug. H addiction takes long term inpatient treatment. Alot of people try for 30 days and the success rate is very low. However, it is all about the mindset. Until his mindset changes that he needs recovery for his own self...he won't recover.
You deserve support. I know you said you are not hiding it, but why have you not told the truth to those in your family that think it is just stress? I promise you when you open up YOU will feel better because your support system will get wider. You need to be able to talk about this face to face with people who care about you. That is also why you should find meetings, they will provide you with unconditional support from others who are in the same type of situation and can understand.
I commend you for your efforts in Florida. From what I hear Florida is the hotspot of those clinics and it is just awful. Those people should rot for what they are doing.
We are here with you. Please please don't isolate yourself from your family and friends. You need a wide support system that is there for you.
God Bless!
Originally Posted by shaynaschild
I so loved your comments. I guess if he was not subjecting my grandchildren to his behavior I would find it easier to allow him to take his time. With my grandson waiting for a kidney..I am afraid his time with his Dad may never come. I know I can't change it..but it really, truly sucks!!! (sorry).
I do not know what will wake him up. I know he wants to stop..I know it is beyond his control and he needs rehab and extensive therapy.
He is having all kinds of medical problems now..skin (staph) infection for months. Lives on anti biotics, Sleeplessness and then stays in bed an entire weekend to sleep. This weird body movement thing he does like body spasims.
I am not ignorant to drugs. Growing up in 60's and 70's I have seen it all. I had good friends die from herion and other drug related incidents. I was no angel. I did my experimentation too..My worse time was with Cocaine but recognized it would kill me and just stopped. I only was a social drinker and never liked anything that made me groggy. So I guess I was lucky to not be one of the ones that couldn't stop.
I am not ashamed of my son..I am sad for him. I know it will take him to lose everything and everyone before he either dies or admits to wanting help to change. I am just sad as his mother feeling so helpless and more sad for his 3 kids and wife.
I am trying to find a group to go to. I have done this before when he was a mess with cocaine. He was 19 then..you would think he would learn or know he is just one of those that cannot use anything.
I do not know what will wake him up. I know he wants to stop..I know it is beyond his control and he needs rehab and extensive therapy.
He is having all kinds of medical problems now..skin (staph) infection for months. Lives on anti biotics, Sleeplessness and then stays in bed an entire weekend to sleep. This weird body movement thing he does like body spasims.
I am not ignorant to drugs. Growing up in 60's and 70's I have seen it all. I had good friends die from herion and other drug related incidents. I was no angel. I did my experimentation too..My worse time was with Cocaine but recognized it would kill me and just stopped. I only was a social drinker and never liked anything that made me groggy. So I guess I was lucky to not be one of the ones that couldn't stop.
I am not ashamed of my son..I am sad for him. I know it will take him to lose everything and everyone before he either dies or admits to wanting help to change. I am just sad as his mother feeling so helpless and more sad for his 3 kids and wife.
I am trying to find a group to go to. I have done this before when he was a mess with cocaine. He was 19 then..you would think he would learn or know he is just one of those that cannot use anything.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Coconut Creek, Florida
Posts: 4
Thanks for your comments. It does not good to speak to him about my concerns. He is in total denial! He explains his issues to being stressed. Also, he feels that pain killers are prescribed, so they are legal and nothing like illegal drugs. Problem is..he has no pain!
Recently his wife has wiped her hand of him. He caught her having phone conversations with an old flame and he is devastated again. I do not blame her but wish she would had handled it differently. She needs emotional support while waiting for a kidney for my grandson. She deals with everything with the kids and all my son does is supply the money so she can be available. But he is not emotionally there for her. I have mentioned a few things to him..but as long as he is in this condition he only has love for one thing and it is not his wife. There is a lot of history that goes with this that makes them both guilty of the failed marriage. My pain is for my 3 grandchildren.
By the way may I ask where in Ohio you are from. That is where my home was. I now reside in Florida.
He is not talking to me now because I know he is in so much pain and feels all alone. I told him I would not bother him but to call when he needs to talk. I am going to fly out and spend the weekend with them. Very concerned as to what the weekend holds.
Recently his wife has wiped her hand of him. He caught her having phone conversations with an old flame and he is devastated again. I do not blame her but wish she would had handled it differently. She needs emotional support while waiting for a kidney for my grandson. She deals with everything with the kids and all my son does is supply the money so she can be available. But he is not emotionally there for her. I have mentioned a few things to him..but as long as he is in this condition he only has love for one thing and it is not his wife. There is a lot of history that goes with this that makes them both guilty of the failed marriage. My pain is for my 3 grandchildren.
By the way may I ask where in Ohio you are from. That is where my home was. I now reside in Florida.
He is not talking to me now because I know he is in so much pain and feels all alone. I told him I would not bother him but to call when he needs to talk. I am going to fly out and spend the weekend with them. Very concerned as to what the weekend holds.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Yes, trying to rationalize with an addict is a complete waste of breath. While I don't agree about his wife speaking with an old flame, at least not in an inappropriate manner, I don't begrudge her for having a hard time. Dealing with an addict is as toxic to the spouse as it is the addict themselves.
I cannot imagine how hard it has to be for you to know your grandchild is so ill and your son in such a bad place. Truly, I encourage you to open up to family and friends and have a full support system for you. It is like the oxygen mask on the plane, you put it on yourself first to be able to help those around you.
I know how sad this is for you. I hope you have a nice visit with your grandchildren and do some things to enjoy your time there.
God Bless.
ps...when I said speak to your family and friends, I did not mean him. I mean telling those around you so you have support for you!
I cannot imagine how hard it has to be for you to know your grandchild is so ill and your son in such a bad place. Truly, I encourage you to open up to family and friends and have a full support system for you. It is like the oxygen mask on the plane, you put it on yourself first to be able to help those around you.
I know how sad this is for you. I hope you have a nice visit with your grandchildren and do some things to enjoy your time there.
God Bless.
ps...when I said speak to your family and friends, I did not mean him. I mean telling those around you so you have support for you!
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