6,8,10 times
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: VA
Posts: 10
Originally Posted by Softball27 
I have struggled for years now, having an addicted daughter...when I think she is doing better and things are finally looking up, down she goes again, she is 25 years old now and this has been a battle for her for about seven years. She has been in rehab once and outpatient therapy once but she always decides she has had enough and will be fine on her own. Can I make her go to therapy again? Should I make her go to therapy? Do I tell her that I don't want to see her or hear from her again until she is clean? Do I just love her and look past the addiction while hoping and praying that someday she will overcome her addiction? I honestly don't know what to do anymore. And to top it off I have a 19 year old son who is struggling with addiction too. So what is the best thing to do????? Tell them I don't want to see them or talk to them until they are clean or just keep loving them and try to be a positive influence in their painful world? Please tell me how best to deal with this.....
Please just continue to love your children. I know how you are feeling, i just found out about my son's addiction. He kept it from me for many years. He is in denial and refuses treatment. I am afraid to call the police to have involuntary committed. I plan to show him that I love him and will be there to see him through this terrible disease.
I may be naive or in denial, since this is new for me. But for now that is all I know to do.
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,691
English Garden,
This is the most powerful post I have ever read on SR ....and I first came here in 2005. I have been AWOL from this sight for a good while now and just stopped by tonight and saw this.
I took a sabbatical because I didn't have the courage to post what EG so eloquently wrote. I hated watching so many with stars in their eyes enter down a path that most commonly ends in terrible destruction.
For awhile there I had a success story....the 20 year crack cocaine addict that got sober. All it took was the love of a good woman. Ha! Yes...he was sober for a total of 6 years but living with him during that time nearly destroyed me...emotionally and physically. I feel that I narrowly escaped the experience with my life. I am grateful that I finally left him. And it has taken a good 3 years to finally reach a place of even basic stability. I thank God every day for that blessing.
My ex went back out after we split up. But...thanks to SR and my recovery program I definitely know that I didn't cause it nor could I have controlled it. His relapse started years before he picked back up. I am convinced that the addict in him was hell bent on destroying me and our relationship just so that he could use again. I so wish that I had been able to recognize what was bound to happen. He was a whole lot sicker than I am smart though.....and I so wanted to believe that we could be different. Talk about delusion and denial.
I wish that I had read that post when I first came here. Maybe it would have made a difference. I really needed to have heard that. I know that people don't like to be told the hard truth a lot of times - me included. My co-dependency all but killed me.
Thank you for reminding me of how important it is to remain in my emotional sobriety.
This is the most powerful post I have ever read on SR ....and I first came here in 2005. I have been AWOL from this sight for a good while now and just stopped by tonight and saw this.
I took a sabbatical because I didn't have the courage to post what EG so eloquently wrote. I hated watching so many with stars in their eyes enter down a path that most commonly ends in terrible destruction.
For awhile there I had a success story....the 20 year crack cocaine addict that got sober. All it took was the love of a good woman. Ha! Yes...he was sober for a total of 6 years but living with him during that time nearly destroyed me...emotionally and physically. I feel that I narrowly escaped the experience with my life. I am grateful that I finally left him. And it has taken a good 3 years to finally reach a place of even basic stability. I thank God every day for that blessing.
My ex went back out after we split up. But...thanks to SR and my recovery program I definitely know that I didn't cause it nor could I have controlled it. His relapse started years before he picked back up. I am convinced that the addict in him was hell bent on destroying me and our relationship just so that he could use again. I so wish that I had been able to recognize what was bound to happen. He was a whole lot sicker than I am smart though.....and I so wanted to believe that we could be different. Talk about delusion and denial.
I wish that I had read that post when I first came here. Maybe it would have made a difference. I really needed to have heard that. I know that people don't like to be told the hard truth a lot of times - me included. My co-dependency all but killed me.
Thank you for reminding me of how important it is to remain in my emotional sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 9
"Addiction is a snake that wraps itself into the interior organs and into the deepest recesses of the brain and of the soul of the addict ... "back away" ... "you need to wake up to the danger you're in."
Right. Absolutely right.
Thank you for saying it and sharing this book with us.
Right. Absolutely right.
Thank you for saying it and sharing this book with us.
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