The Duckpond
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Originally Posted by cynical one 
And, it continues. Next thing we know "She who keeps the lock" will be putting some of that Knuck artic air on The Duckpond and freezing it over.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Sorry....KE gets all the blame here:
to whit: this thread was DEAD for 10 days......and had been properly
buried AND mourned.
KE doesn't let sleeping dogs lay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(which as a common saying somehow beat out Vale's grammatically superior
truism "Don't kick a sleeping skunk")
Back to your auto-corrected naughty words, SR scoundrels.
I'M GONNA TELL!!!!!!
(Vale runs off to tell moderators-----Cynical trips him, LMN & Ann "duck tape"
him to a lightpole.......arguing how long they can tape off his air supply before
permanent brain damage occurs. LMN prevails with 7 1/2 minutes. Vale lives
but at a cost of approximately 30 IQ points----not to mention excessive
drooling).
to whit: this thread was DEAD for 10 days......and had been properly
buried AND mourned.
KE doesn't let sleeping dogs lay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(which as a common saying somehow beat out Vale's grammatically superior
truism "Don't kick a sleeping skunk")
Back to your auto-corrected naughty words, SR scoundrels.
I'M GONNA TELL!!!!!!
(Vale runs off to tell moderators-----Cynical trips him, LMN & Ann "duck tape"
him to a lightpole.......arguing how long they can tape off his air supply before
permanent brain damage occurs. LMN prevails with 7 1/2 minutes. Vale lives
but at a cost of approximately 30 IQ points----not to mention excessive
drooling).
●▬๑۩۩๑▬●
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,405
Oh yeah, you've never contributed to any disruption around here <insert teenage girl eyeroll here>. At least I fully admit and take responsibility for my actions and pay the consequences. And, I don't try to manipulate the mods by pointing my finger at others and playing victim. They've been at this for a long time and I know they can see the BS thru all the reindeer games.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Terrified to their core, said scoundrels run for cover at the thunderous sound
of Vale's threats.Awakened from a sound sleep----moderators scold guilty
parties via private message......which I was able to intercept:
"Really? REALLY?! You KNOW how easy it is to set him off. As far as taping his
air supply off......I mean seriously......9 1/2 minutes and we wouldn't even be
HAVING this discussion! 9 1/2 minutes and that drooling idiot would not be able
to recognize a keyboard, let alone post!"
of Vale's threats.Awakened from a sound sleep----moderators scold guilty
parties via private message......which I was able to intercept:
"Really? REALLY?! You KNOW how easy it is to set him off. As far as taping his
air supply off......I mean seriously......9 1/2 minutes and we wouldn't even be
HAVING this discussion! 9 1/2 minutes and that drooling idiot would not be able
to recognize a keyboard, let alone post!"
●▬๑۩۩๑▬●
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,405
Now Vale, duct tape is the greatest invention in the world, it fixes everything that needs a good fixin'. However, I once had a very good friend that taught me everything I will ever need to seek revenge. You may have heard about her as she and her then husband John, made all the newspapers back in 1989. Her name was Lorena, and she popularized what is now known as the "Bobbit Procedure".
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
It's funny how the glint of light off a blade reshapes the mind of a duck.
When the moderators awoke to all the commotion all that was there to
be seen was a disheveled duck muttering......."it was nothing....back to
sleep.....nothing to see here!"
Feeling out maneuvered by Cynical (Again!!!)....Vale's first thoughts
of course centered on revenge.
But that soon passed....as Vale wished to remain 100% duck
( a reasonable fowl, don't you think?)
When the moderators awoke to all the commotion all that was there to
be seen was a disheveled duck muttering......."it was nothing....back to
sleep.....nothing to see here!"
Feeling out maneuvered by Cynical (Again!!!)....Vale's first thoughts
of course centered on revenge.
But that soon passed....as Vale wished to remain 100% duck
( a reasonable fowl, don't you think?)
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 1,405
That brings up a funny story. My BIL is an EMT. They were called out to a home where the wife found out her husband was cheating. She started fooling around with him and then superglued "it" to his leg while he was...excited. Then poured ice water on that area...shrinkage factor=ouch.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Quack! Quack!! Quack!!!
Vale executed a near vertical takeoff----then only thought possible in
theory, his terror galvanizing his sympathetic nervous system into an
explosion of feathers, adrenaline, and terror at the medievalism he was
confronted by-----and was never heard from again.
Rumors flew, but no confirmed sightings save that of an idiot savant
several counties over speaking of a duck quacking in circles about
things such as blades and superglue, compulsively covering his duck
parts with his wings.
Vale executed a near vertical takeoff----then only thought possible in
theory, his terror galvanizing his sympathetic nervous system into an
explosion of feathers, adrenaline, and terror at the medievalism he was
confronted by-----and was never heard from again.
Rumors flew, but no confirmed sightings save that of an idiot savant
several counties over speaking of a duck quacking in circles about
things such as blades and superglue, compulsively covering his duck
parts with his wings.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Originally Posted by cynical one
Vale, you're a drake. Now stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself in a very firm tone "I AM A DRAKE". Then go and tell your wife..."I AM A DRAKE"...she will understand...trust me.
I told her! Wow!!!!!!!
(Thanks, Cynical! What have I been wasting all my time on
dinner, movies, and chocolate for?!?!?!?!)
-A duck is a rather simple creature, really.....with a simple nervous system
easy to overload. Send it from terror to ecstasy in a short period and it
WILL need an extended reset!
(that's Vale saying 'goodnight')
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