gabriel01

I'm so mad right! I'm going crazy! I can't believe I let this guy messed me up this bad. He just used me for the whole relationship. He used me, my time, my car, my love, cooked for him everyday, used me to make him feel something good in his life, used me for sex. I have better much better education than him, make much more than him, have better people around me. Every friends & my family told me we live in different world, how can I be so stupid to hang on in this relationship for so long after so many people told me he is not good for me. I even took all the ***** his brother said to me. Everything he told me just to manipulate me to make him feel good about himself. How could I be that blind?!? Why am I the one who suffer now while he might just properly drinking or getting high?!? I'm just so angry now. I want to slap him, yell at him, tell him what an ugly person he is.

suki44883

The best revenge, Gabriel, is a life well lived. Many of us have been fooled by addicts. I'm sorry you are dealing with that, but the truth is, it's not that unusual when dealing with an addict.

Use your anger to propel yourself forward. Move on from this chaotic relationship. Don't let him take up space rent-free in your head. He's not worth it.

Kindeyes

Anger is a great motivator.....just don't let it eat you up. Suki is right....the best revenge is moving on and finding someone who deserves all the love you have to offer.

gentle hugs
ke

zoso77

He's not the problem at this moment.

You are. And that's because contrary to what you think, allowing anger to do what it's doing to you is truly a choice. I'm not saying anger is a bad thing, or saying your anger isn't justified. What I am saying is you're not doing yourself any favors by fixating on what this guy did to you. He did it. It's over.

Accept what has happened, and then put one foot in front of the other so you can move on.

ZoSo

neferkamichael

Gabriel01, Merry Christmas, rootin for ya.

Johnston

^ tough message, but true IMO

HealingWillCome

You don't have to suffer. That's a personal choice.

Take your power back, Gabriel. He is completely out of your control, but you and your choices for healthy living are not.

Wishing you peace.

gabriel01

He texted me this morning to ask me to his grandma's Xmas dinner (after 5 days of no contact). I didn't reply him because all I want to tell him is what an awful person he is. He didn't know I know he lied to me and went to drinking after I celebrated his birthday with him. I have friends work at that place, they told me they saw him there last night. N of course he used drug after.

Ann

Zoso is right, what they do is wrong and mean but we do worse to ourselves sometimes by letting it eat us alive.

When they don't change, we have to or lose our very soul. We can choose to stay on the ride or choose to get off. Although it's hard, most times the pain of leaving is far less than the pain of staying.

Ignoring his invitation was a good start. You are worth so much better than any of this.

Think about what you want for your life...based on reality not on what you wish was different with him...and set your sails to follow your dream.

Hugs

Maui78

Holding on to anger and resentment is like being stung to death by one bee. It's only hurting you. I second what was said above. The best revenge is a life well lived. Anger eats you alive from the inside out. Sending you strength to let go.

Rndz7

[QUOTE=gabriel01;4366295]I'm so mad right! I'm going crazy! I can't believe I let this guy messed me up this bad. He just used me for the whole relationship. He used me, my time, my car, my love, cooked for him everyday, used me to make him feel something good in his life, used me for sex. I have better much better education than him, make much more than him, have better people around me. Every friends & my family told me we live in different world, how can I be so stupid to hang on in this relationship for so long after so many people told me he is not good for me. I even took all the ***** his brother said to me. Everything he told me just to manipulate me to make him feel good about himself. How could I be that blind?!? Why am I the one who suffer now while he might just properly drinking or getting high?!? I'm just so angry now. I want to slap him, yell at him, tell him what an ugly person he is.[/QUOT

The problem is we let it happen. So own it, learn from it, and move on.
Change. It's a part of Life.

Hawkeye13

Don't respond and move on.

Everybody here is correct. You will just prolong the torture and
there is no point in being "right" when he will keep doing things that
will hurt you because he is an addict, and that's what they do.

Don't answer his text except to block his number, don't justify anything to him, just don't interact anymore.
Plan the New Year by making your own path and plans.

You keep going back, you keep getting kicked.
You move on, and it is all behind you. Good luck!

martina12

Gabriel I could have written your post...I too feel incredible anger with my RXAH. He totally used me towards the end and I felt exhausted by him emotionally and physically. After months of no contact I was finally starting to gain my strength back. Then he got back in touch and wanted forgiveness...well I tried again but it didn't work and I got really badly hurt yet again. Addicts hurt unfortunately...

rose

Of course you are mad, angry and fuming, you have every right to be. Its part of what happens when we hit acceptance. Active addicts are very good manipulaters, how would one really know when you havent lived life with an addict.


Rose