overit263

So it always seems to take me a week to process things. XAH sent an email asking if we could ever have a conversation face to face. I slept on it, sent a reply a day or two later saying how that would only benefit him etc. etc. so no way will that happen. This weekend I got angry. Angry that he said and did horrible things with no apology, but asked if we could ever have a face to face conversation. I know that he is a coward by nature, and I know this feeling will pass. Of course he said he was sending a check etc. etc. since he stuck me high and dry with loans etc. and of course no check has shown up, and I wasn't counting on it, but all the quacking is really annoying. Just don't send an email at all. Seriously. I cannot wait for this divorce to go through. I cannot wait for no contact. The holidays and living far away from any family and friends is not helping either, I'm working anyway to make sure I have enough cash for my bills etc. anyway. Next year this time will be better I'm sure, but if it isn't, I'm splurging on a trip to Italy for myself. Thanks for letting me vent!

Ann

Maybe try finding a live meeting in your area. It will boost your support and connect you with a whole group of friends who understand what you are going through.

It may be the best Christmas present you give yourself.

Hugs

overit263

Thanks Ann, no meetings anywhere near me at all. Just have to power through the feelings and get to the other side. It's a little better tonight. I'm not so angry today, but with Christmas in a few days it made me upset.

needingabreak

((((overit)))) Christmas can be a really tough time of year for so many reasons. I hope you can move past these feelings and soon move onto indifferent! It is a much better feeling. I have found myself to be in such an angry ugly mood of late. The only thing that seems to help is my faith and going to church. I hope you too can find something to pull you up and bring you peace.

overit263

I'm already feeling good again thankfully! I started jogging last night and need to keep up with that, it gets the anger out and tires my dog out. Came home today to leaving my puppy crated for the first time since it was a half day at work (he usually gets to stay in doggy day care while I'm at the office) - and he destroyed it which thankfully made me laugh instead of crying...he was still in it, but he was trying to get out of the bottom of it apparently. Such is life. I'm just happy to have some days off at this point. Thank you for the responses! I'm sure I will have some dips coming, but hopefully they will last shorter and shorter.