Latest update about my daughter
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Rochester NY
Posts: 15
I also agree you should get her things out of there. She sounds like my daughter as well. I think the day that my daughter calls and asks me how I am doing, or how MY job is, or how do YOU feel mom is the day that we can establish contact again. While they keep concentrating on their needs, their wants, and their feelings, it is a sure sign that they are not changing.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: East Coast of Florida
Posts: 61
Well, the push is on. It's now Tuesday evening and she called me at work this afternoon to tell me she was having a crisis and doesn't know what to do. She gets out on Friday, and thought she'd been accepted at a halfway house, but was informed today that her insurance will not pay for it so now she doesn't know what to do. She said in a quavering voice when I told her that I didn't know what I could do, since she's an adult and her father is the subscriber on the insurance, and the rehab will not discuss her issues with me, "I guess I'll just end up back in jail".
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,429
Hi Newimage;
You have to do what is best for you here.
She is not the boss of you or your home.
Think it out. You let her back in because you feel sorry for her.
What will happen next?
She has to learn to accept responsibility for herself to have any chance
of a future, drug-free life. Don't keep enabling the drug use.
If you could have fixed it with love and support, it would be fixed by now.
Now love and support yourself, hard as it is.
Peace to you in a very difficult time.
You have to do what is best for you here.
She is not the boss of you or your home.
Think it out. You let her back in because you feel sorry for her.
What will happen next?
She has to learn to accept responsibility for herself to have any chance
of a future, drug-free life. Don't keep enabling the drug use.
If you could have fixed it with love and support, it would be fixed by now.
Now love and support yourself, hard as it is.
Peace to you in a very difficult time.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 11,429
I think taking her items out of the house and putting them in storage if needed is a much better option than letting her in the door.
I agree with tightening security like changing locks etc. if needed.
Don't fall for the "I need a shower" "I need to go inside to pack" and so on--didn't she do something like that earlier? I can't recall exactly.
I agree the rehab is a good resource for her--in fact, you may want to call them directly and make it very clear that she will not be welcome in your home nor will
you be making any arrangements for her.
How is your other daughter doing through all this, by the way?
I recall she really was against her sister's return the first time.
I agree with tightening security like changing locks etc. if needed.
Don't fall for the "I need a shower" "I need to go inside to pack" and so on--didn't she do something like that earlier? I can't recall exactly.
I agree the rehab is a good resource for her--in fact, you may want to call them directly and make it very clear that she will not be welcome in your home nor will
you be making any arrangements for her.
How is your other daughter doing through all this, by the way?
I recall she really was against her sister's return the first time.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
