An insane rant....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 157
An insane rant....
So I just want to make sure that there is no misunderstanding right off the bat. I love my kids. I wouldn't go back and not have them. They are the only reason I live at this point....
But.... I was divorced with 3 kids when I met him. We had 2 more kids. I agreed to have those last 2 because I "KNEW" he would take care of me and the kids. He begged me. I caved. We had a good life back then... And funny, He would have had 10 more if I let him...
Now look where I am.... I am raising these kids alone. My 7 yo is almost unbearable.... she whines constantly, hangs on me, cries ect.... I thought that I couldn't make it to her thanksgiving thing today and she threw a fit all morning.... I made it. But was late picking up my 16yo. I try to be patient. I know that she is in as much pain as me. But It is so hard....
Some days I feel like I can't take it. He is off running around doing dope and what ever he feels like. He is living in our camper. So he really has no bills. Sometimes I cry so hard I feel like my head is going to blow up....
This is not what I signed up for.....
I am alone.... I AM F'ING LONELY!!!! and doing EVERYTHING!!!! I don't know who will babysit tomorrow while I go to work.....
WHEN DO
I GET TO
BE
IRRESPONSIBLE???
But.... I was divorced with 3 kids when I met him. We had 2 more kids. I agreed to have those last 2 because I "KNEW" he would take care of me and the kids. He begged me. I caved. We had a good life back then... And funny, He would have had 10 more if I let him...
Now look where I am.... I am raising these kids alone. My 7 yo is almost unbearable.... she whines constantly, hangs on me, cries ect.... I thought that I couldn't make it to her thanksgiving thing today and she threw a fit all morning.... I made it. But was late picking up my 16yo. I try to be patient. I know that she is in as much pain as me. But It is so hard....
Some days I feel like I can't take it. He is off running around doing dope and what ever he feels like. He is living in our camper. So he really has no bills. Sometimes I cry so hard I feel like my head is going to blow up....
This is not what I signed up for.....
I am alone.... I AM F'ING LONELY!!!! and doing EVERYTHING!!!! I don't know who will babysit tomorrow while I go to work.....
WHEN DO
I GET TO
BE
IRRESPONSIBLE???
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: NE Wisconsin USA
Posts: 6,223
So sad...and sorry for you.
I don't know what to write.
I wish I could wave a wand.
I hope you are not alone with this. I haven't read any of your other posts.
It would be nice if you could get a church or family member to help.
I don't know what to write.
I wish I could wave a wand.
I hope you are not alone with this. I haven't read any of your other posts.
It would be nice if you could get a church or family member to help.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: East Coast
Posts: 427
Rant away! We all feel like that even if like me, there are no kids involved. We all wonder why that get to run away to be irresponsible and why we don't get a break...but that's because we are the responsible ones and we wouldn't ignore our obligations and responsibilities. Your kids will appreciate all you've done one day if they don't already. Stay strong, hang in there, it will seem less hard at some point.Be thankful your kids aren't around him at this point, who knows what kind of stuff they could have ended up seeing, hearing or being around. I'm sorry you're in this position, and I'm sure there will be others that respond that are in a similar situation.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 275
Omg, I am so sorry!!!! I don't know what to write either, expect of f-g vent all you want. I have 3 kids from a previous marriage and a heroin addicted husband. He gets to come home all doped up and I (feeling crazy inside and wanting to fall apart), get to put on a smile and make dinner for my kids. My AH gets to leave soon, as we are separating, after I have been supporting his a-s for 2 years in jail, I get to stay in my house that is falling apart, 3 months behind mortgage, bills not paid and he gets to go. You know what, its OK. He won't get to hear my girls cry or laugh (btw, I have a 9 year old who CONSTANTLY wines also, ALL THE TIME 
) and he won't see them grow up and be teenagers and then women and he will never see them get married and have kids on their own. God wouldn't give us what we cannot handle. I believe that. I mean, I am doing it now. Hugs and much love to you, stay strong.
) and he won't see them grow up and be teenagers and then women and he will never see them get married and have kids on their own. God wouldn't give us what we cannot handle. I believe that. I mean, I am doing it now. Hugs and much love to you, stay strong.
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