SteppingStone

My recovering AXBF is 7 months clean & sober but moved out 4 weeks ago saying it was for me as I deserve better than to have to deal with him for the rest of our lives & he also had to concentrate on his own recovery. I was very supportive and proud of his recovery and told him this regularly.

So my question is:

If they are advised not to make any major decisions in the first year, why did he walk out on our 5+ years relationship???

overit263

Probably because he needs to make his recovery all about him wanting it to be successful, it can't be about you or you deserving a clean partner etc. Hopefully that's the reason.

zoso77

I honestly don't know.

Yes, five years is a good chunk of time. I don't know your story, but how much of that time was he high? Because if he was high for most of that period, then you didn't have a relationship with the real him. You don't know who he really is. And frankly, he doesn't really know who he really is, either. As painful as this is, it's probably necessary for the both of you.

ZoSo

dizzle00

I am not you or him, obviously, and I've no doubt that you are in a lot of pain, but I think it's possible that he truly had your wellbeing in mind with this decision. Do you want to deal with this for the rest of your life? I am still struggling with this question myself. Sending love your way.

gothbarbie

mine did the same thing to me before going to rehab. 2 months ago. I have not heard anything from him since I'm staying no contact as well. I'm fighting Evert day not to take it personal. this sight has helped alot though. stay strong & silver! xoxo