needingabreak

Well, we got a call from my son tonight. He was very upset and could barely talk. Seems he unknowingly helped his drug dealer move some bikes (he supposedly works on bikes) that were stolen (unbeknownst to my son) and the police showed up to bring my son to the police station and question him. My son told them everything and even drove (separately which is weird) to the place he had brought the bikes to. The police were following him in a unmarked car. The police said as long as their stories jive he wont be charged. My son says how does he know the drug dealer wont blame him and lie. The drug dealer saw him drive by and messaged him asking why he drove by but did not stop. My son said because the police were there. MY son is fearful the guy will know he told the police what happened and told the drug dealer he was going back to rehab. On top of this, as we knew, he had slipped up and done more drugs. We told him we will speak to him when we get home but wanted see how he was doing as far as the drugs. He said he isn't doing them now and has an appointment with his therapist tomorrow. I asked him when it was going to end and when he was going to start making better choices. He said "right now." He knows this is a bad road to go down. I am glad he is scared. I hope he is scared out of his mind. We are praying this has scared him enough to want to stop but who knows. I told my husband we cannot help him anymore. This kid is slowly killing us. I am determined to still live my life. I don't know what else to do. At the same time, between my son and my parents, I want to run away. He is almost 30. When does this **** end???? I hate addiction. I hate it with a passion and I hate the drug dealers even more.

Leana

As a parent of a 23 year old addict (sober 61 days), I completely understand.

pravchaw

Maybe some good will come out of it. My son was arrested 3 years ago dealing in marijuana with 4 other kids in our car. He was 18 and I did not have clue he was addicted. He blamed the pot on another kid. I spent a lot of money and time getting the charges dropped. Now I Wish I had not done that, and let him suffer the consequences.

Txhelp

Jail has been a strong deterent for both of my kids (young adults).

I gave them one free get-out-of-jail card. Then, I told them there would be no more. They have been arrested since and were not bailed out. Now...its the last place that they want to go.

Like Pravchaw I regret not letting them stay in the first time! I have learned letting them feel the pain...all of it... is the best way to motivate change.

needingabreak

Pravchaw, we already spent money on his rehab. We both agree if something happens he can get a public defender. We are DONE. MY son said he saw the fliers a couple days ago about the bikes and felt sick to his stomach but was too scared to say anything. The man who works on these bikes does it for a hobby and was devastated. I even commented how awful and low it was on his Facebook! I am sick to my stomach over it. I asked my son when is he going to realize these people care NOTHING about you! He says he never should have left California but I told him this stuff happens everywhere and drugs are everywhere. He needs to learn to say NO and get stronger. Right now he needs to do whatever it takes to stay off the drugs. He knows he screwed up. Hopefully in the end he will not be in trouble but I am glad he is scared. Thanks for the support! I dread going home. He is 30 going on 16.

lizwig

I could have written your post. I'm so sorry. Before I shut my son's phone off I would get these (not exact) types of anxiety provoking calls all the flipping time! It was always someone else's fault, never his, he was just being nice....wrong place wrong time....So glad those emotional bombs no longer land in the middle of my days. I hope this has scared your son. It should!! Can you imagine? At some point we have to lay down our end of the rope. We can always pick it back up if we see them really working at climbing out of the hole. Remind them they are loved but recognize they have to want change for it to happen. Sending you strength....