overit263

Am I the only one that wants to tell my friends who are prone to nonsensical drama to just shut up? I feel like I just cut ties with my AH as soon as I found out he relapsed, and I really could care less about the stupid mistakes they are choosing to make-because they have options, they just want to choose the most harmful to themselves. One wants to cheat on her mentally ill husband that she won't enforce him getting help for, but won't leave either and almost got choked out by..the other wants to move back in with a cheater coke head boyfriend because "she just shouldn't be alone right now". I am just so annoyed and had to be annoying and vent. What I want to scream is "I'm divorcing a junkie that's making the whole process difficult, call me when you have a real problem that you don't want to make poor decision about, because I feel like we are having the same conversations constantly!!!"

Am I the only one with a short fuse when you are dealing with the stress of an addict? I'm exercising, eating right etc., but I don't need any drama added to my life!

MLJ88

Hi I totally get where you are coming from. I have a friend that calls me with every little thing that goes wrong in her life. She is a drama queen about petty stuff- especially with the men in her life. She's mad at her current bf for working too much bc she only gets to see him 3 days a week. I get very annoyed bc I think to myself "if she only lived one day in my shoes with my AH." she has no idea what I go through on a daily basis with him or what I have lived through in the last 8 years.

But I listen to her and offer advice. We have to remember that they have not walked in our shoes, it's not they're fault that we have dealt with serious issues. Those problems are real for them. They may be small to us but they are big to them.

Eve13

overit, I think we have to choose where we spend our energy. If your plate is full with your own situation, it's probably good to disengage with drama-folks, even if it's temporary. It's part of self care. Finding some positive energy folks that help lift you up instead of wearing you down.

overit263

I agree! I give an honest opinion, which I know comes across as harsh sometimes...but it just comes out of my mouth. If they keep going after that, I disengage for a while...which is probably why it wasn't as hard as I thought it was going to be disengaging from my AH. I started feeling like I'm still having the same conversation with these dramatic ladies, and they are being extremely codependent and it is really frustrating. I have a real problem with people being codependent with me too, I'm more of a loner, I enjoy my time alone, I go do things by myself, don't get me wrong, I hang out socially too, but I have no problem spending time with myself!

Anywho! Thanks for letting me vent!