MamaCas

My daughter's fiance is in active addiction to opiates. He denies all use and his parents are very much enabling him (rent, food, clothing, insurance, etc). However, the signs are very evident and he's not hiding his use as well as he thinks he is.

Currently, my daughter is trying to detach from him but they have a 10-week old baby. Any advice on how to detach but still let him see his son? Should she let him see his son? We're not trying to use the baby as any sort of "tool" in this process...just trying to do the right thing.

Ann

It is very dangerous to put a baby in the same place as an active addict. Drugs can be found and ingested, exposure to addictive behaviour can have serious impact, and anyone active in addiction of any kind cannot be relied upon to be responsible for the care or supervision of a child.

Your daughter should get legal advice and have something drawn up that would put conditions on any visitation with the child...such as supervised visits only and if there is any sign that the other parent is not clean and sober, the visit shall be cancelled or terminated immediately.

Your daughter is capable of making her own choices, good or bad, but the child needs a voice, someone to protect them from the evils addiction can bring to the family and the home.

My son is an addict and I know the sadness, but always and always, children first.

Hugs

MamaCas

Thank you, Ann. I agree. My eyes have been opened to a whole new, very sad, world.