a better day
 

So, today is a better day which is funny because it's dull and rainy outside. I have to work and i've been alone all day aside from the casual interaction between peers in two of my classes. I am surprisingly calm and collected today. Last night my recovering boyfriend hadn't talked to me all day which had eaten me up, but he finally did and he's was much more considerate. For once, without him actually being there to warm me up, i felt whole. As a complete person without a facade i had to impose upon others but a natural contentment for life which i hope to hold dear while in this process of being supportive to my boyfriend. I know, i know that it's not a lot. I'm not asking for a lot, i'm asking for baby steps towards a better life and one with him in it, and i'm glad i found something in the mess i mentally surrounded myself in yesterday. lets just hope it continues.

Hi amberrose, welcome. :ring

Thanks, I needed this reminder today. Sometimes I try to take huge footsteps. I hope your day continues to be happy and filled with contentment

lol no problem i'm glad it helped. Everyone here needs as much support as possible. As for me, i'm just glad i still have him, and he still makes me happy. I'm working on the rest.

I love this one too, feel the same about my husband. He is in rehab right now, miss him a lot but supposed to come home couple weeks.

yeah rehab sucks so much. it seems like it was ages ago and it's only been a month and a half.. i'm glad for you how long has he been gone? and what is his problem? well, let me just tell you, please be prepared to not expect much out of him right away. it's not fun, it's so rough.. but eventually each passing day will get better. i wish i could see the future for myself but i'm stuck where i am. I'm trying to focus on myself for a while (school, friends blah blah blah) i can't make my boyfriend my center anymore.. which sucks but i will learn to live with it. i have been having a good day thank god! i hope you will too.

He relapsed on IV cocaine and heroin, Valium. He has been in rehab almost 3 months now. I didnt know him when he used before, it had been years ago. Not sure what to expect when he comes home. A while ago the light seemed to return to his eyes, and he came back. Thanks for the warning, sounds like you are making your way through. Any regrets?