khoye

I use the term recovering lightly. My ex boyfriend just celebrated three months sober last week. He has a sponsor, sober friends, has rebuilt family relationships and is living in a sober house. He's started hanging out with drug friends again. Not heroin addicts but kids that like ecstasy, nitrous, ketamine, and all that stuff.

He went to some party and lied to the house about it last weekend and has since been selling drugs again and being very involved with the lifestyle. We went to a concert with a ton of friends on Friday night and I walked into a hotel room he was in and found him all drugged up on ketamine. It obviously upset me to see after three months of him being sober and happy. At this point I've detached myself from him and don't really care to stick around and be collateral damage for what is to come. He and I have been talking and spending a little time together here and there. We started saying I love you again and possibly talking about getting back together and then his behavior changed.

I just want to know what to think about this behavior he is exerting. From being extremely happy about recovery, being super into the program and only hanging out with his sober friends, to the exact opposite. he hasnt even been attending meetings or anything recently. But he is on drug court so legally, he has to stay sober otherwise he will end up in prison. Not that he cares.

So what do you guys think? Is he doomed for a heroin relapse? What should I make of all of this

terryr97

IMO, it doesn't matter if he relapses back to heroin or not. He's relapsed. It doesn't matter what the substance is. My XABF says he only drinks every once in a while and thats it. First off, I know thats a lie and second, it doesn't matter because he's not sober from anything and he's not going to meetings or hanging around sober people. So, it doesn't matter if he's back on heroin or just drinking. Addicts are gonna do what they're gonna do and then they're usually gonna lie about it.

Ann

I agree, he IS in relapse and has just exchanged one drug for another.

He doesn't sound ready to do the hard work that goes with being completely clean and healthy.

The question you need to ask yourself is how much longer do you want to ride the roller coaster with him. It just goes round and round and up and down and never leads to anyplace good.

Sadly, we need to get off the ride and find out own balance to move ahead to healthier living.

I hope he can reach out to recovery again one day soon. I hope you don't waste your life waiting for this to happen.

Hugs

AnvilheadII

he IS in relapse.....not much to ponder there! he's violating the terms of drug court and will likely jeopardize his future. doesn't matter WHY one bit....is IS what it IS. he's your ex, probably good to stay that way and TREAT him as such....no hangin' out, no touchy feely, no i love you stuff.....great wads of distance are in order.

Ketamine
A surgical anaesthetic withdrawn from the market due to disorientation and violent behaviour that occurred when patients regained consciousness; on the club scene, ketamine is in liquid form or a white powder snorted or smoked with marijuana or tobacco products
Pharmacologic effects Dissociative anaesthesia, CNS stimulant, hallucinations, visual distortion, a loss of senses, sense of time, and identity for 30 minutes to 2 hours, delirium, amnesia, impaired motor function, hypertension, depression, recurrent flashbacks, potentially fatal respiratory problems
Segen's Medical Dictionary. © 2012 Farlex, Inc. All rights reserved.

amberrosejanusz

My boyfriend is a recovering heroin addict and he wont even have a glass of wine with me because of the fact that one drug will lead him to the next if he wants to be clean he can't touch anything!!!