someoneswife

I've struggled everyday since my husband came home from rehab almost two weeks ago. He had a small slip and isn't going to as many meetings as the rehab recommended. The thing is, it's not about him. He's acted pretty normal since he's been home but I'm acting all crazy. Searching, accusing and smelling clothes and breath for beer. I've reached out to my sponsor almost everyday and she's been awesome. I've been reading my al anon books like a fiend. Even doing all these things I've still felt like I was teetering at the edge of a cliff. I'm not acting half as bad as I would have before alanon and I'm recognizing my thoughts and stopping lots of them before I act on them. Things just weren't fitting for some reason. This morning I has my usual Saturday morning al anon meeting. I heard so much there from so many people that touched me. That I could relate too. I heard so much that touched my soul. Sure the reading helps and coming to this site does too but being in the rooms of alanon is magical. Three people came up to me after and said that I was doing really well. Do you know how wonderful it feels that others see a change in you when you can't see it yourself? I got and gave hugs this morning. Hugs from people I know and hugs from people I don't. Even if I don't know them, on some base level we are bonded. Bonded by this desire to get better, by the hurt we've been through and by the empathy and compassion we share. I need that face to face time. I always leave feeling lighter. Feeling a little more sane. So even when I'm feeling my craziest, weak and alone people there understand. They don't judge me at where I am on my path. So for today I'm grateful and feeling blessed that I have such a huge amazing support system!

AnvilheadII

good for you! there truly is a benefit to being smack in the middle of the Atmosphere of Recovery by others who know exactly what you are going thru! best wishes as you continue your journey!

Ann

Meetings were my salvation. There is something about "the rooms" that just fills me with peace.

I'm glad you are feeling it too.

Hugs

pravchaw

I don't attend al anon but I try to attend a family group meeting run by the director of our local detox centre. There is comfort in knowing you are not alone. People don't realize it but a family member may actually be more sick than the addict. This sickness then rubs off on the addict and reinforces his addiction. When the family member starts to recover in many cases good things happen to the addict too.