Husband completed Week 1 of Outpatient

Old 10-05-2013, 10:04 AM
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Husband completed Week 1 of Outpatient

I had a very different Friday night than the ones that brought me to SR.

My husband completed his first week of the outpatient program on Thursday, and he enjoyed it. Chatted me up after both sessions. We celebrated Friday night together, his success of quitting so far, and his commitment to recovery.

Baby and I are happy for him, and hopeful for the future.
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Old 10-05-2013, 02:26 PM
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Great stuff!!! So glad to hear things are going well. Thumbs up to him for completing his first week. He seems positive and that's great!!!
You and your family are in my prayers.
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Old 10-06-2013, 03:42 AM
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I'm so happy for you! That's great news!
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Old 10-06-2013, 02:43 PM
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I started going to church on a regular basis again, and he joined me today. We both come from religious families, and grew up in church. Going back had nothing to do with his addiction, but I feel its time to put focus back on things that are at the center of family, and religion is part of that for me. I want to have a church family here where we live, since our own families are not close by. This knowing feeling has been at me for weeks now, I wish we lived closer to our families, but there is no way we can move right now. Its early for him doing this, anything could happen, right now is all we have to build on.
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Old 10-06-2013, 04:11 PM
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That's so nice onenight! I hope you find the church that you like and become very close to the other members. This will be good for you, your new baby and your husband. Did your husband enjoy the service? In my IOP my counselor stressed the importance of NA/AA or church (faith-based community) for our sobriety. She said that addicts who became a part of these types of communities had fewer relapses.

Excellent idea onenight!
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Old 10-06-2013, 04:27 PM
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My husband is in a faith based treatment program...he has been there for a week now. It is a 9-10 month program. I got a letter from him and he sounded positive. He said he knew he needed to be there and he knows that only God can help him. I can see him after 30 days and I pray he really does it this time. Is there any real success stories out there? I am tired of this rollercoaster ride...I really am...I do have faith that he can get overcome this if he puts the work in...am I being unreasonable?
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Old 10-06-2013, 04:59 PM
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Church was my place of peace when my world was falling apart. I lived in a big city then so could stop at any number of churches that were open and just sit quietly and pray. I began going on Sundays as well, and it helped me find my spiritual balance again.

We moved to a smaller place a few years back and although I don't have a regular church here, I find a special peace when I do take time to attend one.

I'm glad things are going better for you and your husband. Church is a good place to start.

Hugs
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Old 10-06-2013, 05:18 PM
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Originally Posted by OneNightAWeek View Post



Baby and I are happy for him, and hopeful for the future.
Here is from one who knows you not
that is one of the best things I have heard all daycare the
wishing for many continued blessings for your family
mb
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Old 10-06-2013, 05:21 PM
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When I first began my recovery, I had a lot of guilt. I did so many things during my active addiction phase that I felt guilty about. Especially, how much my behavior had hurt my family. I think being able to turn some of those things over to God and ask for his forgiveness helped me a lot. I believe I owe it to God to stay clean, because I believe He has forgiven me. My family says that they have forgiven me so I assume that if they can then of course God must have too. At least I hope so! When I get tempted to pickup again, I think of all the things God has given to me in my life that I am grateful for. At least I can be a good sober/clean Mom for my kids!

I think spirituality does play a big part in my recovery.
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Old 10-06-2013, 06:37 PM
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your thoughts shared - show a grateful soul

Originally Posted by cleaninLI View Post
When I first began my recovery, I had a lot of guilt. I did so many things during my active addiction phase that I felt guilty about. Especially, how much my behavior had hurt my family. I think being able to turn some of those things over to God and ask for his forgiveness helped me a lot. I believe I owe it to God to stay clean, because I believe He has forgiven me. My family says that they have forgiven me so I assume that if they can then of course God must have too. At least I hope so! When I get tempted to pickup again, I think of all the things God has given to me in my life that I am grateful for. At least I can be a good sober/clean Mom for my kids!

I think spirituality does play a big part in my recovery.

even though I don't believe in mind reading
wow -- it's almost as if you have read my mind

you remind me of me with your thoughts shared above

many blessings sent
from
Mountainman
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Old 10-06-2013, 07:37 PM
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There must be a link to my husbands mind going on here too, and I thank all of you for your comments and support.

When he was thinking about going with me, he said he felt like he didn't belong there right now because he wasn't a very good Christian. From the way he talks, he is just now beginning to feel intense guilt. This may sound cruel, but I let him do horrible things to me in the beginning, I'm glad he recognizes the pain he caused me, and what he let himself become. But then I also want him to forgive himself, like I've forgiven him, and from it become be a better man, and a better father.

I'm still working on forgiving myself and want to be a better woman, wife, mother.

I told him that our God is kind, compassionate, and forgiving. God welcomes us back to his house with open arms, without judgement, he doesn't ask why we have been gone so long, is only happy we are back. I told him when he was ready, he could settle things with God, he is waiting but there is no timetable.

One thing I discovered, churches like pregnant women. I'm barely showing, but they fuss over me, and so many people were thrilled for him to come, greeted him, one man asked if he liked football and said sometimes a group gets together to go to a game, or watch it on tv. The church doesn't believe in drinking, that's a plus.

After, we talked a lot about going to church when we were kids, and questioning what it meant for our parents to go. I think we are both realizing this addiction is the first time either of us have had to question who we are, what we believe in, what glue holds us together. It's a life lesson for me. It's a life and death lesson for him.
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Old 10-06-2013, 10:48 PM
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Great news OneNight.

My husband went to a rehab that was based on private therapy, not based on the 12 steps, but they still placed emphasis on a persons spiritual recovery. I think its important especially during recovery to help people deal with shame, guilt, forgiveness. We go to church with our son (almost 2) and it has become more important to us since we became parents. Im happy for both of you.


Originally Posted by Tinky View Post
My husband is in a faith based treatment program...he has been there for a week now. It is a 9-10 month program. I got a letter from him and he sounded positive. He said he knew he needed to be there and he knows that only God can help him. I can see him after 30 days and I pray he really does it this time. Is there any real success stories out there? I am tired of this rollercoaster ride...I really am...I do have faith that he can get overcome this if he puts the work in...am I being unreasonable?
My husband has been clean for somewhere near 18 months now. He went to a 3 month rehab, and then came home, still does routine therapy for support. He is doing really well. I think there are a lot of success stories. There is one forum on this site that is just for recovery stories, you might check some of those out. I don't think you are being unreasonable in having faith....
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