countrylove

Long story short I met my BF in rehab about a year ago. We quickly began a relationship upon leaving and continued to work on our recovery together. I discovered that he had smoked pot a few times (his DOC being alcohol), after a death in his family. I was told he had stopped and didn't think anything else of it. Fast forward a couple months and he had some pot and a pipe. We had both stopped doing ANYTHING recovery related and I began smoking with him. I ended up getting pregnant and stopped smoking and knew he continued. I confronted him and told him that it bothered me since we were bringing a child into relationship and I didn't want the baby exposed to that. He said he would quit and I was hesitant to believe him. I knew he was still smoking by his actions and I found some paraphernalia. I once again confronted him and told him its me and baby or the pot. He apologized to me after getting mad and said he would quit once again.

Fast forward a few months later and now baby is here and 2 months old. I knew he had some paraphernalia hidden and didn't say anything to him about it as I knew where it was and knew it was not in use. I noticed yesterday that it was suddenly missing after previously finding bottles of eye drops in his truck. I confronted him once again and asked if he resumed smoking and he replied no. Upon further questioning he admitted that he had smoked recently with some friends and also drank a glass of champagne. I was furious with him and told him this is his LAST chance and if it happens again IM LEAVING with our baby. He became all defensive saying he should never have told me and that he wasn't lying to me and that he wouldn't tell me next time.

Advice Please???

Ann

I'm sorry this is happening Countrylove, but glad you found us and are reaching out for support.

Sadly, he doesn't seem ready to stop and his words mean nothing when his actions belie his promises. His excuse about not lying is not taking responsibility for his actions, he's just sorry he got caught.

You need to decide how you want to live and how you want to raise your child. Living with an active addict makes home life miserable and it would be even worse if you lost your own sobriety in the process.

You have a baby now and you have to be her voice, she cannot defend herself or choose a safe environment, but you can do that for her.

Take a read around and make yourself comfortable. You are among friends here who understand.

Hugs