Update on me, Mr. ke, and son in recovery
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Update on me, Mr. ke, and son in recovery
Son is still sober. Working hard....long days. He works for someone in NA with many, many years of recovery and rides with him to work each day (mini meeting!). He's saving for a car. He's paying his fines. He can get his drivers license back now but rides the bus home from work until he saves up some funds for a vehicle. Going to meetings. Hanging out with sober friends. He's a pleasure to be around these days. Never thought I would experience that.
We've sold our house. That came as a bit of a surprise as we didn't really think it would sell quickly. Now I'm in the process of selling almost everything we've got so that we can move into an apartment (oh man....I haven't lived in an apartment for 28 years!). Putting 75 percent of our belongings in a garage sale so getting ready for that next weekend. And moving on August 9th. Our business is VERY busy. Life is very busy.
We are preparing for a simpler life.....totally debt free......possessions carved down to what we "need". The process is scary and liberating all at the same time. Our home, although not large, is very time consuming......large manicured property (1.3 acres) that we take care of ourselves.....so this move will free up lots of time and reduce our living expenses by about 60%.
It's difficult in some ways to let go of so much of our lives voluntarily.....but in some ways possessions and real estate hold us down. We are looking forward to being able to travel a little more (not a whole lot more because of the business but we have a great General Manager who oversees things while we are gone). And the time that was spent caring for the yard.....and the money that was spent on a mortgage and house upkeep....will now be spent differently.
Life is in transition for my dear husband, Mr. ke, and I.....as well as for our son.
Life is an adventure. Sometimes a scary one......but this is an adventure that Mr. ke and I are creating together.
And to think........what would my life have been like if I'd stayed with my addicted exhusband 30 years ago........?
gentle hugs
ke
We've sold our house. That came as a bit of a surprise as we didn't really think it would sell quickly. Now I'm in the process of selling almost everything we've got so that we can move into an apartment (oh man....I haven't lived in an apartment for 28 years!). Putting 75 percent of our belongings in a garage sale so getting ready for that next weekend. And moving on August 9th. Our business is VERY busy. Life is very busy.
We are preparing for a simpler life.....totally debt free......possessions carved down to what we "need". The process is scary and liberating all at the same time. Our home, although not large, is very time consuming......large manicured property (1.3 acres) that we take care of ourselves.....so this move will free up lots of time and reduce our living expenses by about 60%.
It's difficult in some ways to let go of so much of our lives voluntarily.....but in some ways possessions and real estate hold us down. We are looking forward to being able to travel a little more (not a whole lot more because of the business but we have a great General Manager who oversees things while we are gone). And the time that was spent caring for the yard.....and the money that was spent on a mortgage and house upkeep....will now be spent differently.
Life is in transition for my dear husband, Mr. ke, and I.....as well as for our son.
Life is an adventure. Sometimes a scary one......but this is an adventure that Mr. ke and I are creating together.
And to think........what would my life have been like if I'd stayed with my addicted exhusband 30 years ago........?
gentle hugs
ke
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
Posts: 1,991
Yay KE!!!
It sounds to me like a perfect plan. I often think of the choices down the road, including downsizing to a simpler home.
I am so happy your son is doing well. It gives all of us moms a little hope that better times can be ahead.
It sounds to me like a perfect plan. I often think of the choices down the road, including downsizing to a simpler home.
I am so happy your son is doing well. It gives all of us moms a little hope that better times can be ahead.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Eastern Time Zone
Posts: 1,011
God is good! If you had stayed in your old situation, yes, you would be a zombie by now.... certainly not enjoying travel with a nice man !
thanks for the update on your son - I will continue to pray for all involved.
Sojourner
thanks for the update on your son - I will continue to pray for all involved.
Sojourner
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Colorado
Posts: 577
Kindeyes, such great news about your son. It warms my heart to hear of his path...as well as his focus on improving himself. Really, really good news.
Wow...you are busy! Lots of changes coming your way! Exciting ones though! My husband and I are looking forward to downsizing someday soon. I'm tried of cleaning 4 bathrooms for the two of us! New chapter in your book...which could quite possibly be the most exciting one!!
Thanks for the update...many of us really need the good news we hear here. I am hopeful.
Wow...you are busy! Lots of changes coming your way! Exciting ones though! My husband and I are looking forward to downsizing someday soon. I'm tried of cleaning 4 bathrooms for the two of us! New chapter in your book...which could quite possibly be the most exciting one!!
Thanks for the update...many of us really need the good news we hear here. I am hopeful.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Thank you for all of your kind words. I spent today getting stuff ready for our moving sale. It all went ok until I got into the front bedroom closet. That is where all of my grandson's toys are......were.......it was very sad to put price tags on all of those things. What price can I put on the memories of my grandson.........
But I got through it (with some help and a shoulder to cry on.....my dear mother was there to help me). All in all, as I sort through what I am keeping and what is being sold or given to the Salvation Army.......an entire lifetime of "things"......I realize how very lucky I am in the big scheme of things.
Most of all.....I do have my dear husband.....whom I never would have met if I didn't have the courage to change my situation many years ago. For all of the women (and men) who are wondering if there is life after being married to an addict.....yes....there is and it can be a good life.
gentle hugs
ke
But I got through it (with some help and a shoulder to cry on.....my dear mother was there to help me). All in all, as I sort through what I am keeping and what is being sold or given to the Salvation Army.......an entire lifetime of "things"......I realize how very lucky I am in the big scheme of things.
Most of all.....I do have my dear husband.....whom I never would have met if I didn't have the courage to change my situation many years ago. For all of the women (and men) who are wondering if there is life after being married to an addict.....yes....there is and it can be a good life.
gentle hugs
ke
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 628
Dear Kindeyes, Thank you for this pleasant update and thank you very much for spreading your messages of hope, compassion and wisdom on this board. Its been a great help to newcomers like me. Many it come back to you a hundred fold.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
(((Kindeyes)))
A happy post. Very happy to hear how well your son is doing. And how exciting for you and your hubby, making big life changes.
I am glad your sweet mama was there to help you through the tough stuff... we never know what good things await, after the heartache, you know? I believe your grandson will be in your life...you and your loved ones are always in my prayers.
Thank you,for the encouragement and hope you give to others, as you share.
Great big happy hug coming your way,
chicory
A happy post. Very happy to hear how well your son is doing. And how exciting for you and your hubby, making big life changes.
I am glad your sweet mama was there to help you through the tough stuff... we never know what good things await, after the heartache, you know? I believe your grandson will be in your life...you and your loved ones are always in my prayers.
Thank you,for the encouragement and hope you give to others, as you share.
Great big happy hug coming your way,
chicory
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,384
Wonderful news on your son!
I think you will feel much lighter after getting rid of all that stuff and moving!! I have done that same thing before. It gave me a fresh chance to change my life and do new things. We sold many things, and also donated a ton.
Are you getting professional help with the move? That can be a huge help. Moving is exhausting. Label your boxes really well with the name of the room where they go and what is in the boxes. Also, have an "open first" box.
Good luck and enjoy the new life!
I think you will feel much lighter after getting rid of all that stuff and moving!! I have done that same thing before. It gave me a fresh chance to change my life and do new things. We sold many things, and also donated a ton.
Are you getting professional help with the move? That can be a huge help. Moving is exhausting. Label your boxes really well with the name of the room where they go and what is in the boxes. Also, have an "open first" box.
Good luck and enjoy the new life!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 923
Wonderful,Kindeyes.
My hubby and I are in the process of the same thing...although we have staged it and done it in incremental steps. I feel so much lighter...and am now searching for an apartment for the two of us.
God Bless...
My hubby and I are in the process of the same thing...although we have staged it and done it in incremental steps. I feel so much lighter...and am now searching for an apartment for the two of us.
God Bless...
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I love what you are doing and so tickled that your son is doing well.
Mr. Ann and I downsized and simplified 5 years ago, it was hard getting rid of so much "stuff" but I kept what was important, passed on most of the family albums and heirloom furniture and a 12 place setting of limoge dishes from the 1920's that had belonged to my grandmother...my two nieces took 6 place settings each. Even after we moved, I had a lot of thinning out to do but it feels so good to live unimcumbered by "stuff" and debt free.
Life IS an adventure and we enjoy it most when we have freedom to do what we want to do.
Hope you and Mr. KE have some wonderful adventures ahead.
Hugs
Mr. Ann and I downsized and simplified 5 years ago, it was hard getting rid of so much "stuff" but I kept what was important, passed on most of the family albums and heirloom furniture and a 12 place setting of limoge dishes from the 1920's that had belonged to my grandmother...my two nieces took 6 place settings each. Even after we moved, I had a lot of thinning out to do but it feels so good to live unimcumbered by "stuff" and debt free.
Life IS an adventure and we enjoy it most when we have freedom to do what we want to do.
Hope you and Mr. KE have some wonderful adventures ahead.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 134
Kindeyes, thanks for the wonderful update! It is good to hear that your son is working hard in his recovery and that you and your hubby will be having more time to enjoy life. I've not been posting much but check in from time to time ... I'm always blessed by your posts . Rejoicing with you today 
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