It starts with YOU... finding peace
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Dublin
Posts: 15
It starts with YOU... finding peace
I apologize upfront if this post seems hard or graphic. I am writing cause I care and love ya’ll.
I have been reading all over this forum and there are definite themes as I look at what people write and do. Generally cycles get repeated, repeated and repeated. With our DA’s we take their crap, lies, manipulations and then say we will go no contact, work on ourselves, blah, blah. Be honest with yourself and ask how much mental space do you allocate to them, are you really no contact?? If you think of them you ARE contact, if you feel for them you ARE contact, if you just text them a teeny weeny little message you ARE contact, if you speak to mutual friends about them YOU ARE contact.
How much more must it take before you realise you are repeating, repeating, repeating? Must you have your innocent children infected and affected by all this so that they can repeat the cycle later in their lives, must innocent people die, must you get AIDS, syphilis or any other disease (cause trust me you are not the only one they are doing and getting their sexual kicks and fixes from), must your life be turned upside down, must your brain become obsessed 24/7. How much more destruction by your DA must you endure and how many more ruined lives, good relationships, innocent and healthy people must suffer (including you)?
Where is your self-respect? When you are with your DA do they promise the world, tell you they will be clean or are clean, create and promise you amazing things and the never follow through? When they have sex with you, how do they treat you? Do they insist on sexual positions that avoid eye contact or are actual degrading, do they treat you like the dog in doggy style? Do they really care or just getting their jollies off! Is any of the relationship real or has it been one big drug induced hallucination and you are just part of their special effects?
COME ON people get with YOUR programme and get YOU healthy. This life journey is tough enough and it starts with you! Let the addiction to your DA go and let them go. Get healthy and you will find peace.
Peace out ya’ll !
I have been reading all over this forum and there are definite themes as I look at what people write and do. Generally cycles get repeated, repeated and repeated. With our DA’s we take their crap, lies, manipulations and then say we will go no contact, work on ourselves, blah, blah. Be honest with yourself and ask how much mental space do you allocate to them, are you really no contact?? If you think of them you ARE contact, if you feel for them you ARE contact, if you just text them a teeny weeny little message you ARE contact, if you speak to mutual friends about them YOU ARE contact.
How much more must it take before you realise you are repeating, repeating, repeating? Must you have your innocent children infected and affected by all this so that they can repeat the cycle later in their lives, must innocent people die, must you get AIDS, syphilis or any other disease (cause trust me you are not the only one they are doing and getting their sexual kicks and fixes from), must your life be turned upside down, must your brain become obsessed 24/7. How much more destruction by your DA must you endure and how many more ruined lives, good relationships, innocent and healthy people must suffer (including you)?
Where is your self-respect? When you are with your DA do they promise the world, tell you they will be clean or are clean, create and promise you amazing things and the never follow through? When they have sex with you, how do they treat you? Do they insist on sexual positions that avoid eye contact or are actual degrading, do they treat you like the dog in doggy style? Do they really care or just getting their jollies off! Is any of the relationship real or has it been one big drug induced hallucination and you are just part of their special effects?
COME ON people get with YOUR programme and get YOU healthy. This life journey is tough enough and it starts with you! Let the addiction to your DA go and let them go. Get healthy and you will find peace.
Peace out ya’ll !
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 1,618
I think that if life is the school of hard knocks, then we only repeat the lesson until it is learned.
I think some people just don't want to get well.
I believe that many of us, myself included are willing to dance the dance.
I think Alfred was right when he told Bruce Wayne " some men [ or women ] just want to watch the world burn."
I think that peace comes when we do what our HP wants us to do.
I think some people just don't want to get well.
I believe that many of us, myself included are willing to dance the dance.
I think Alfred was right when he told Bruce Wayne " some men [ or women ] just want to watch the world burn."
I think that peace comes when we do what our HP wants us to do.
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Exitville
Posts: 214
i think it takes time.
it takes time to heal.
it takes time to process.
it takes time to turn it around to us.
it takes time to forgive and forget.
it takes time to learn to fight for us the way we have for others.
it takes time to let it go.
it takes time to get it right.
it takes as much time as it takes and as many questions as it takes and as many posts or stories or reflections or memories.
it takes time to learn.
it takes time to remember some are only starting from a place you were once were.
it takes time to heal.
it takes time to process.
it takes time to turn it around to us.
it takes time to forgive and forget.
it takes time to learn to fight for us the way we have for others.
it takes time to let it go.
it takes time to get it right.
it takes as much time as it takes and as many questions as it takes and as many posts or stories or reflections or memories.
it takes time to learn.
it takes time to remember some are only starting from a place you were once were.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 923
peacedove...thank you so much...i always doubt my process so much and wonder why it is so long...and what is wrong with me...in my low points and during hard times. then i look back and see that the process is taking it's course, but i am learning different things each time...and that i am slowly and slowly getting wiser and living better and more centered and peaceful and happy. and it is this that makes me thank the Lord for the journey...because otherwise, it would have been unendurable. the only success story is my own...i have failed in all other battles to change anyone else or to save them or to make them like me and approve of me...but slow by slow...getting to a point where i like me and approve of me.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
