PineappleCity

I was wondering if there are others here who's addicted person had been in the military, and then after coming home began using drugs? My friend, I know some of his issues went back before this, but he was in the military for a few years and was overseas. He has shared some awful memories to all this. I know the experience and painful memories are not an excuse to use drugs, but I also know it can be damaging to a person, post traumatic stress. dont know how long that can continue?

Ann

There are many reasons why people begin using drugs and those who hang on to addiction long after the "fun" is gone are often those with deep rooted psychological pain. Experiences in the military could well be one kind of that pain.

I think for those who use to numb the pain are best served if they have good support such as meetings and psychological help as well. Rehabs often have resources of professionals who are good at working with addicts to identify and work through their pain.

Unless the addict is willing, it doesn't matter why they started or how it may end...they are stuck for the moment until the pain of using becomes greater than the fear of stopping.

I hope your friend reaches out for the help he needs. Veterans groups often are helpful at providing support groups and professional guidance.

Hugs

legna

I've waited a day after I saw this post to sleep on it and see if I really wanted to post a response. Turns out I did. I was court ordered to twelve step meetings in 1978. Seven years later I returned from the military completely broken. That began a seven year relapse. I do get the idea that an addict will use any excuse but this was not like that. I have since healed from the horrific PTSD that I returned with...actually I healed in what I call the grace period following putting drugs down for good twenty-one years ago.

For what it's worth, my wife did 24 years in prison for murder. For the curious, she was kidnapped, transported across state lines and sold into the sex trade. While it is unusual, the person who bought her tried to control her through drugs, introducing her to them while handcuffed and being shot up against her will until she was addicted. She saw an opportunity to escape and took it. She had to kill someone to do so though. It turned out that the person she killed was innocent. She was fifteen years old... explains why we got married while she was in prison - she was too young to get married legally when they sentenced her to life without the possibility of parole. We got that overturned in 1988 to life with the possibility of parole. My wife still suffers from PTSD. Here is a portion of a letter I wrote to the parole board after my wife's 2009 denial for parole. I'm adding a piece of it here just because it does talk about ptsd.

Members of the Parole Board:

I know that your interest doesn’t lie with me, but what I know will seem idle speculation without an explanation. The most lasting lesson I have taken away from my military service is that taking a life leaves an unbearable, tortuous and indelible mark upon the psyche. Society makes a distinction between murder on the battlefield and murder on its streets but it has been my observation that the effect on the person who actually takes the life is the same. I’m certain it makes no difference to the dead and, emotional pronouncements to the contrary, I don’t think it makes much difference to the loved ones of the fallen either; hero or victim, dead is gone forever.

In my search for healing I have spoken to hundreds of combat veterans, members of law enforcement and inmates. On any journey, we pass mile markers along the way; a journey of healing is no different. Passing through layers of remorse, self-loathing, coping mechanisms and denial, you learn the landscape. One thing that I’ve learned is that most people don’t take the whole journey; they don’t want to. They find a place that offers them a balance between the pain of the past and the fear of the future and they hide. Some hide behind patriotism or duty only to find that in the darkness of that hiding place one also finds alcoholism and nightmares. Some look for solace in blaming people, places and things, some refuse to look altogether.

Such paths of self-preservation become prisons. People become invested in whatever solution they have come to believe in and refuse to let go, even if letting go would lead them to true freedom. As I’ve talked with people over the years, I’ve listened to them describe old haunts of mine, patches of emotional quicksand and snake oil. I’ve watched as they sought relief in drugs, religion and zealotry of every flavor in an attempt to mask unbearable and undeniable pain. I’ve listened as they’ve explained and justified using the same words that I once did and knowing that their peace will not last, the nightmares will return; their battle is not yet won...

Anyway, there is a way out. While Ann gave good advice concerning veterans groups, not all of us could navigate the process. Anyway, I'm telling this part of my story here in case your friend...or a friend of anyone else here, wants to drop me a pm and talk to someone privately and anonymously.