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-   -   How do I start following a 12 step program? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/290232-how-do-i-start-following-12-step-program.html)

Aydan 04-06-2013 12:57 AM

How do I start following a 12 step program?
 
I would love to start the process of Nar-anon or Al-Anon 12 step program but I have no clue where to start because I am new at this. How do I start the program if I cannot attend face-to-face meetings and there is so much literature at the website I don't know what I need to start the program. Is there anyone that can give me some guidance please?

Lily1918 04-06-2013 01:07 AM

Hello again! :) I started off with the book " codependent no more " by melodie beatie. Imo It is a great read for family members. The "stickies" at the top of this forum are an excelent place to start also. Eventually I went ahead and read "the big book" from AA chapters entitled: to the wives ( the concepts can be applied to siblings and other family members too)and the family afterwards.

Im sorry for the reasons that brought you here, did you say your loved one is in treatment? That's good. One day at a time.
Keep posting k?
Lily

Ann 04-06-2013 04:51 AM

Melody Beattie also wrote Codependents Guide to the 12 Steps and that book has always helped me re-work my steps. My first time through was with my sponsor, and I highly recommend that, but for those who cannot get to meetings I think this would be very helpful.

This link is new to the sticky threads at the top of this forum. It used to be there and I could not find it this morning, so I am glad you asked because now it is up there again.

Good luck.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ependents.html

*edited to say, this link is new and final.

Kindeyes 04-06-2013 08:41 AM

Even though you cannot get to F2F meetings, you can buy a couple of great books on the steps. Here are my suggestions for working the steps without going to F2F meetings:

1. Pick up Melody Beattie's "Codependents Guide to the 12 Steps".
2. Pick up "How Al-Anon Works" and/or "Paths to Recovery"
3. Develop relationships with people on line who have a good base of recovery.
4. Ask one of them to sponsor you. With telephone calls now often being free with cell phones, landlines, and Skype, this is now a viable possibility.
5. Stick with it, take it slow, don't rush the process. It took me 1-1/2 years to go through the steps the first time.

Those are my suggestions for anyone who wishes to go through the steps without attending meetings. I suppose with Skype..it might even be possible to have an online 12 step group study (hmmmmm......interesting thought).

Good luck. It's a lot of hard work but it's worth it.....and so are you.

gentle hugs
ke

Hanna 04-06-2013 09:41 AM

Hi Aydan,

I'm working through the twelve steps with a partner over email using the questions here.
Friends and Family Step Study - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

My partner found me here on SR and already has a great deal of experience so that is very helpful. We have some key things in common which is also really helpful.

Maybe you could do something similar.

Welcome to the Forum.

Peace,
Hanna

Carlotta 04-06-2013 10:09 AM

Welcome to the forum. You might want to check out that link. There are mailing lists and online chats Al-Anon Chat Meetings -- Online Al-Anon Family Groups Chat Meetings

Aydan 04-06-2013 11:31 PM

I think the chat link might be very useful. Thank you everyone for all the information.


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