jamr

I'm writing here kind of a last resort. In October of 2012, my father passed away from pancreatic cancer. I moved out from Arizona to Indiana, where my parents lived, to help take care of my dad. I also promised him that after he passed away I would help take care of my mom. Ever since, my mom has been smoking weed and cigarettes. I have told her that she cannot afford it because she is on a fixed income, yet, she continues smoking. I have ran out of options. I have told her how much it is hurting me, and that I want her to stop, because I do not want her to end up like my dad did. Unfortunately, she has so many people around her that are enablers. Her best friend, who lives nextdoor to us, is the person who she gets her weed from. Her youngest son, who is my brother, also smokes weed, so he does not have any problem with her smoking either. I know I promised my dad I would help take care of her, but I'm not sure I can stand around and watch her ruin her life. I'm 27 years old, and sacrificed a lot to move to Indiana to help my family out, and I feel like I'm kind of getting the short end of the stick here. Any advice? Would it be wrong for me to move out and back to Arizona?

Dee74

Hi and welcome jamr - I moved your thread here.
I know you'll find a lot of support and experience in this forum

No, I don't think you'd be wrong. I think your father would want you to live your life and be happy.

Seems like your mother's made her own choice - you need to make yours now I think.
D

Natsy

Your happiness is what your father wanted. Be happy and stay positive. Arizona is beautiful and warm. The sunshine cures many ailments.

BeavsDad

Setting a boundary of "I refuse to help adults that refuse to help themselves" might help clear things up.
It's helped me alot, especially with family.