Lily1918

online it said it would be Al anon, but when I got there it was an open meeting and they begged me to stay. The reading was on relationships, and I was the only codie there, and the rest were all alcoholics. I listened as every single one of them shared about thier loved ones, and how many times they were the ones who had to go "no contact" or even divorce thier wives because they wouldn't let them own thier recovery and tried to fix them still. not one of them used the term dependency, and by the time it was my turn to share I was in tears. ".... and Im a codependent." you could have heard a pin drop. I shared my struggle with being a codie, and how I struggle with the denial of grandma, and had to almost cut her out for similar effects to my sanity. I was in tears to see these alcoholics in recovery share how they lost thier loved ones to codependency even though they were sober, and it filled me with SO MUCH FEAR. I need to do this. I am powerless to it. Only god can fix me. I am a HUGE part of the problem and here I am crying because its true!!!!!! I will lose everything if I don't fix myself. Im grateful I went to the "wrong" meeting today.... god is good.