Anger towards God, again.

Old 02-03-2013, 09:44 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by dasiydoc View Post
My boyfriend was doing a lot of research on treatments for addiction. And I started reading a lot too. There is a lot of research out there, and I saw this tv show once also where they say people in treatment or in early recovery benefit from taking on the responsibility of a pet. Animals offer unconditional love, and they reduce stress, anxiety. And they say that many people get help with overcoming emotional damage done while they were using. They learn to take care of someone else, have someone else responsible for them, put the animals needs above their own at times. It makes them have more self esteem when they care for the animal and then see it return affection. I think getting the dogs was a good idea. It wasnt his fault the dog was sick when he got it. But from what your saying, the dog (what he needs to do for the dog) is working in all those areas in his life where he needs it. It sounds like he is doing all the right things for the dog, but I can understand how it is hard on him emotionally. I think Gods little fingers were involved with that dog, but maybe he has good intentions. Well he is God, he is supposed to have good intentions for our ultimate good.
When my husband was in rehab they had animal therapy for the patients. Also, there was a man there that brought his dog with him. Some people have pets and are so attached they have a problem leaving them to enter treatment. When you think about it, it makes sense because rehab is often for 3 months. that is a long time to have to leave your pet, board your pet, or expect family or friends to care for a pet, and sometimes people have burned so many bridges, they no longer have anyone that will help them.
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Old 02-03-2013, 10:20 PM
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I'm a cat person. I love all animals but cats are my favorite!

I have 4, or had should say, the oldest was 14. The youngest, a beautiful, loving, smart male tabby who was 10. He had an enlarged heart, diagnosed as a kitten but was super healthy otherwise for the whole 10 years.

The oldest cat "changed",i guess you could say.....she started attacking my husband and basically turned vicious.

We made the decision to have her put to sleep.

2 weeks later,i lost my male tabby to a bi lateral deep vein thrombosis....the night before thanksgiving.......

I don't have kids. These cats are my kids. I mean 2 in 2 weeks??

Sometimes i really question god.....i mean i really question the whole concept.

The last year if my life has been reason to question things.
I think it's really normal to be angry with god sometimes.
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Old 02-06-2013, 06:07 AM
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Originally Posted by zoso77 View Post
When I was 10, my father died of a heart attack in the middle of the night at age 53.

Within a 12 month period, I put my mother into a nursing home, saw my mentor self destruct due to alcohol, and lost the love of my life -- not my AXGF, BTW.

And there were times I was wondering where the hell was God.

The answer I've came up with is pretty simple.

Life can be brutally unfair and hard. The only guarantee we have in life is that it will end. From beginning to end is one, long stochastic process with highs, low and everything in between. And it is what it is.

These days when I pray, I thank God for what I do have: brains, musical ability, the people in my life. And when I pray for something, it's usually the strength, the clarity, and the focus I will need to get through these next three months. I also pray for those I truly love, including those I have lost...to death, or otherwise.

Believe it or, I think it's healthy to be angry with God. When someone very close to me was dying of cancer this past fall, I was livid because he didn't take her sooner rather than later. I would literally say out loud, what the hell are you waiting for?

I got His answer when I went to her wake and spoke with her children. They described the last three months with their mother as a gift, with a lot of giving and sharing. And at the end, she went easy. So here I was praying for her to go quick, because I didn't want her to suffer...when in fact her children got a very precious three months with their mom.

Funny how God works, huh? And after she was gone, when I prayed, I said, OK, I get it now.

I guess what I'm saying in a very roundabout, sloppy way is God's got His own ideas for us. And instead of focusing on what we may not have, give thanks to Him for what we do have.

Best,
ZoSo
Thanks for your post Zoso. It was beautifully written and a prime example of how we as individuals cannot begin to understand the scope and magnitude of all tha God does. The reasons are revealed to us in pieces, or in portion if we are lucky, but sometimes never at all.

I think it is ok to be angry at God, and to express your feelings. That is the way he made me at least, so if he doesn’t like it then he can tone that attribute down in future generations. My son on the other hand, he is angry at God and seems to hold it in more, and cant find a way to make peace. I hope it will happen in time, and maybe now that he is back in counseling.
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Old 02-06-2013, 06:13 AM
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Wanted to again thank everyone for their comments. Especially those of you who shared how much your pets meant to you when you were in early recovery and dealing with all the emotions.

When I wrote in my first post about how myself, and his girlfriend supported the idea of him getting a pet dog; I think we were both on the same page thinking that it would be good for him to bring that type of unconditional love into his life, and have something outside of work to be responsible for, and yes bring some life into his house because with a pet in the house things change, and a different energy is brought in, and in my way of thinking house becomes more of a home.

My sons has a lovely house, but it has a rather cold feeling even though he has all the fixings.. furniture, artwork, etc. I think it is in part because he keeps everythiing in its place, and it looks untouched. (dogs fix that !). He has a lady that cleans his house; she even brought in flowering plants & waters them herself to give it a more happy vibe !

I did tell my husband about the comment his girlfriend made about her thinking he was using again. Like I said, the thought wasn’t shocking to him either because we had discussed it due to the dog situation. We are going to pray he works on his emotions, and his using in counseling, and we will just try to watch his behavior closely. I don’t think there is anything else we can do. (however if you have suggestions... Im up for them)

Today he takes his dog in for the first chemotherapy appointment. I am praying that the dog does not get sick from it. When he came home after surgery, it was very hard to see him because he was on pain meds, and was maybe traumatized from the experience, tried to wander around the house that was new to him, in sort of distress, and would finally lay down and be shaking, wouldn’t eat good for days, had the shaved spot and incision, and had to wear that collar. It was hard to see an animal in that condition.
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