cmhcali

I took a personal health day today. Thank god I have good work attendance and plenty of time to take off. He is going to detox thursday night and asked me if I could hold his bank card when he gets out and give him an allowance. I know there is part of me that would love to do that.

I love how he understands everything when he is high and my heart is breaking. I want to believe he will get better. I am going to a friends at 5 and then hope to hit either an al-anon or nar-anon meeting. I know I need to go there and get strength from members that have recovered. All I can say is I am so angry. I knew the risk getting involved with an addict and that is my part and I have to own that. I know the risk if I choose to go back to the addict. I have a choice I just wish it was easier. I am taking a nap at our house today as he is at work and it is so nice being in my bed. I hate staying with friends. I am grateful they took me in though.

mstrust

"All I can say is I am so angry. I knew the risk getting involved with an addict and that is my part and I have to own that. I know the risk if I choose to go back to the addict. I have a choice I just wish it was easier."

amen. i am feeling the very same way today. angry...angry with myself for continuing to put myself through this. mine says he has been accepted into a rehab somewhere far away. i hope he was and i hope he goes. i'm going to use the time and distance to my best advantage.

zoso77

So, have you considered why this may not be a good idea for you?

sallyjoseph

Whatever you do you know whether it is good or bad.