Son Relapsed
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by crazybabie 
lol LMN. Vale has great hugs but that condo does sound good 
Lie
Cheat
Steal (specifically tires)
Damsels in distress always a tug on the Ole heart strings
anything else you can add??
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
You two can't even agree on WHERE!
I say VA beach,you say Myrtle......I say SF,
you say San Diego!
'Kinda like the addict.Gets a fellow to show up with Benjamins
and asks if he could bring smaller denominations next time.ONLY
an addict can receive FREE MONEY,delivered to a time/place of
their choosing----then complain about the FORM said currency
takes!!!!!!
I say VA beach,you say Myrtle......I say SF,
you say San Diego!
'Kinda like the addict.Gets a fellow to show up with Benjamins
and asks if he could bring smaller denominations next time.ONLY
an addict can receive FREE MONEY,delivered to a time/place of
their choosing----then complain about the FORM said currency
takes!!!!!!
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by Vale
....so Lincolns,Jacksons,Grants, and whoever the hell graces the
front of a $10 bill...
..........is ok?
front of a $10 bill...
..........is ok?
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
I must admit, I am confused...so what's new? Nothing, I spend 1/2 my life in the state of confusion!
You are ok with your husband smoking pot, although, he too was/is addicted to pills, yet
you are upset about your son, as you feel pot is a gateway drug for him, which may lead him back to pills. This is very confusing to me, sounds like a double standard and sends a mixed message to your children, it's ok for pop to smoke pot, which appears to lead him to pill addiction, but not acceptable for your child? Not that I find any mind altering substance ok...Honestly, I struggle with this one.
Since no one else is confused, it must be me!
In any case, it is what it is. I hope that everything works out ok and that you find some peace in your world, a vacation sounds like a real good idea!
Take care, Dolly
You are ok with your husband smoking pot, although, he too was/is addicted to pills, yet
you are upset about your son, as you feel pot is a gateway drug for him, which may lead him back to pills. This is very confusing to me, sounds like a double standard and sends a mixed message to your children, it's ok for pop to smoke pot, which appears to lead him to pill addiction, but not acceptable for your child? Not that I find any mind altering substance ok...Honestly, I struggle with this one.
Since no one else is confused, it must be me!
In any case, it is what it is. I hope that everything works out ok and that you find some peace in your world, a vacation sounds like a real good idea!
Take care, Dolly
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,741
Let me try and clarify some of this if I can Dolly, I am confused about where I stand if hubby was to start smoking pot again I never saw pot as a gateway drug I have just started to accept that it is. Why did I never see it that way? Well my father, my mother , my cousin, myself, (off and on age 15-18) and my husband all have smoked pot and that was all I am not saying it was OK for us to do it was "normal" in my world.
Everything bad was normal, mom getting beat almost daily normal, me being called mom by siblings normal..... it took my best friend many years to get me to understand much of what I felt was "normal" wasn't.
My son does not know I am or that I have ever been confused about pot I have always taught my kids NO substance are good. I will admit however that I stayed with my husband through the pot days and that may have very well sent my son some mixed signals that at the time I was not aware of. When we know better we do better. So, as far as I know at this time I don't see how I am sending my son any mixed messages?
My husband as far as I know is substance free I think when my son relapsed I panicked because I want my husband to stay clean although I don't think he will I do believe he will go back to pot.
What will I do if he does? I don't know I don't have to decide today but yes I am thinking and praying about that.
I don't mean to write a book here but I may as well lay out how I feel while I am writing.
I always thought my oldest son was the first addict because he was doing any and everything he could get his hands on he was stealing from us left and right, breaking in other peoples houses, he was taking candles and making fake crack and selling it things with him were bad.
I now see that I had in my mind a stereotype of what I thought an addict was and I also see I was wrong.
My parents were the first addicts I knew they drank often but no one ever used the words alcoholics in my world I was sheltered and never hear that word until I was in my mid 20's. I wanna clarify it was my step-dad that beat my mom not my dad they divorced when I was 7.
I never saw my husband as an addict until 3 years ago again I was wrong. When I joined here in 2007 it was because of my oldest son oh how I wish I had stayed here and kept working the program then but I didn't and I can't change that.
The reason my middle son and pot touch me like they do is obviously the overdose.
Somehow it feels different with my son than my husband? I don't know why that is something else I need to figure out.
I am far from being where I would like to be but I have made a lot of progress in my recovery Thanks, Dolly you have given me a lot to think about.
Everything bad was normal, mom getting beat almost daily normal, me being called mom by siblings normal..... it took my best friend many years to get me to understand much of what I felt was "normal" wasn't.
My son does not know I am or that I have ever been confused about pot I have always taught my kids NO substance are good. I will admit however that I stayed with my husband through the pot days and that may have very well sent my son some mixed signals that at the time I was not aware of. When we know better we do better. So, as far as I know at this time I don't see how I am sending my son any mixed messages?
My husband as far as I know is substance free I think when my son relapsed I panicked because I want my husband to stay clean although I don't think he will I do believe he will go back to pot.
What will I do if he does? I don't know I don't have to decide today but yes I am thinking and praying about that.
I don't mean to write a book here but I may as well lay out how I feel while I am writing.
I always thought my oldest son was the first addict because he was doing any and everything he could get his hands on he was stealing from us left and right, breaking in other peoples houses, he was taking candles and making fake crack and selling it things with him were bad.
I now see that I had in my mind a stereotype of what I thought an addict was and I also see I was wrong.
My parents were the first addicts I knew they drank often but no one ever used the words alcoholics in my world I was sheltered and never hear that word until I was in my mid 20's. I wanna clarify it was my step-dad that beat my mom not my dad they divorced when I was 7.
I never saw my husband as an addict until 3 years ago again I was wrong. When I joined here in 2007 it was because of my oldest son oh how I wish I had stayed here and kept working the program then but I didn't and I can't change that.
The reason my middle son and pot touch me like they do is obviously the overdose.
Somehow it feels different with my son than my husband? I don't know why that is something else I need to figure out.
I am far from being where I would like to be but I have made a lot of progress in my recovery Thanks, Dolly you have given me a lot to think about.
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Crazybaby, I never thought too negative about pot smoking for adults either. In fact, I would have rather someone smoke a little pot then drink. I really don't like being around drinkers. I know many successful people whose lives appear in tact that smoke pot. I still choose not to judge them however I know I don't want to be around any of it, anytime now. All that has changed for me!
I can even remember thinking pot smoking for most kids was almost a right of passage or typical teenage behavior. Not that I approved of it, I just didn't think it was huge deal at one time. I smoked pot and drank as a teenager, most if not all of my friends did too. Then one day, I just didn't like it anymore and stopped. I was lucky, some were not!
I can even remember thinking pot smoking for most kids was almost a right of passage or typical teenage behavior. Not that I approved of it, I just didn't think it was huge deal at one time. I smoked pot and drank as a teenager, most if not all of my friends did too. Then one day, I just didn't like it anymore and stopped. I was lucky, some were not!
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
Ok, thank you for the clarification. I do have some childhood friends that have never really progressed beyond pot, although, their life has been nothing but turmoil and setbacks. Their accomplishments in life have been minimal and their mental and physical health has suffered dearly, they are 65 going on 80. For others it did turn out to be a gateway drug, and their life ended up a complete mess, many are dead, then we have those that fooled with it for awhile and let it go. Lol, it is amazing what you can find out at HS/College reunions!
Me, never had any interest in either drugs or alcohol, I was raised in an abusive alcoholic home, wanted a different lifestyle, problem is I married 2 alcoholics (both died of cancer) and briefly hooked up with a real winner, drug addicted alcoholic, biggest mistake of my life! My 87 yo mother is still tossing them down, 66+ years of drinking daily, she loves those water glasses of manhattans.
You have made great progress, I am sure that you will figure it all out, no doubt about it, we are
a product of our childhoods!
Me, never had any interest in either drugs or alcohol, I was raised in an abusive alcoholic home, wanted a different lifestyle, problem is I married 2 alcoholics (both died of cancer) and briefly hooked up with a real winner, drug addicted alcoholic, biggest mistake of my life! My 87 yo mother is still tossing them down, 66+ years of drinking daily, she loves those water glasses of manhattans.
You have made great progress, I am sure that you will figure it all out, no doubt about it, we are
a product of our childhoods!
Getting there!!
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by dollydo
a vacation sounds like a real good idea!
P.S. We know better to jump the fence so I think we will just ring the front door bell instead. You wont be hard to find with a pink hummer in the driveway and we will have on our pink codie BTDT T-shirts on - so keep an eye out for us.
lol
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
Sorry, all my guests must be able to jump my fence, it is just one of my rules!
My door bell doesn't work, I disconnected it when exabf lived with me, he would come home in the middle of the night and start ringing the d@mn thing (I wouldn't let him in), one night I got the ladder out of the garage and pulled the wires out...I fixed him...right...since then, everyone has to bang on the door to get my attention...might be time for me to buy a new one, it's only
been 4 years,why rush...right?
Between the pink hummer and the manatee mailbox you can't miss my house, people actually stop and talk to Manny, he is now wearing shades and a black hat, he believes that he is one of the "Blues Brothers"! His favorite dance is the "Chicken Dance", Jake and Elrod can't keep up with him, he can really shake a tail feather!
You guys are welcome, anytime...it will be a real experience...one that you will never forget!
My door bell doesn't work, I disconnected it when exabf lived with me, he would come home in the middle of the night and start ringing the d@mn thing (I wouldn't let him in), one night I got the ladder out of the garage and pulled the wires out...I fixed him...right...since then, everyone has to bang on the door to get my attention...might be time for me to buy a new one, it's only
been 4 years,why rush...right?
Between the pink hummer and the manatee mailbox you can't miss my house, people actually stop and talk to Manny, he is now wearing shades and a black hat, he believes that he is one of the "Blues Brothers"! His favorite dance is the "Chicken Dance", Jake and Elrod can't keep up with him, he can really shake a tail feather!
You guys are welcome, anytime...it will be a real experience...one that you will never forget!
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