.........and we have another
 

Relapse!!!!!!! Yep, there it is in black and white. I suspected, I said nothing!! I didn't react. I knew time would reveal more and I KNEW Thursday for sure. But as much as I have learned, I still cant help take this personally. I would be lying if I said otherwise.

Get this....it's not his fault, he broke him arm and had to have surgery and that caused it. uhmm OK, whatever. He will go on suboxone, if "I" want. Uhmmm, go on whatever you want. Will you please help me detox, please, please! Uhmm, not just no, but NO WAY IN HELL!!

He has tried it all, every manipulation trick in the book. Oh, the sad tears, we are married, I would never walk out on you, you are my whole life, poor guy....is just so sorry. OK, whatever. Yes, he is sorry alright.

He makes me sick, he makes my skin crawl. I don't want to be any where near him. I have looked all day for a place that will take my 2 dogs. I am done!! I want out!! I never want to hear the word addiction again in my personal life. I never ever want to see his face or his voice. His evil aura is enough to make me RUN!!

In many ways, I am glad. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later - better now then later. He is not the man for me. He is a lying, manipulative drug addict POS!! I feel nothing but utter disgust! Going no contact will be very easy now!

Oh and he wants me to split up the money! uhmmm, OK!! Be serious!! I am walking away from it all. He can keep everything. I don't want any reminders of the emotional abuse I have endured and allowed!! I just want my dogs.

Soon, I will be free!! Addiction-less! He hasn't reached his bottom but I have.

:tyou I feel better now, lol!!

P.S. Don't worry my codie friends, I am refusing to engage with him at all. ;)

Bless your heart. You are doing well in handing all of his crap and misery right back to him where it belongs.

Know that I am cheering for you! :)

Sending gentle hugs of support, dear! :hug: :hug: :hug:

I'm sorry,LMN.

LMN, I'm so sorry. It sounds like you've had a drama filled week filled with lies and manipulations. It really stinks to be there listening to all the crap coming out of the addict's mouth. It sounds like you managed to get some peace from him? Are you staying in separate places? My thoughts are with you. You have so many wonderful new tools and have come a long way since you joined SR. Take care.

Wishing for you a quiet place to live with your dogs and be restored to health.

Get some fresh air tomorrow, it will help. Do whatever will help you feel the presence of your Higher Power.

My exrabf (15 years clean in CA, from heroin and cocaine) changed so suddenly, after morphine for an accident. We abruptly (very painfully for me) parted and have not had contact in 2 years. Reading your story makes me wonder if he is using, too. But I stay NC. He is on my mind every day, but i stay NC. Your story helps me. We all know that an addict's recovery is about humility, honesty, and genuine daily accountability. Without that, life with an addict, even if he is clean, hurts too much. The addict MUST work a DAILY spiritual program, otherwise the ego is too much at risk of being taken over by the addiction. When the addict relapses, the self-centeredness and justification sets in. The relationship is done.

Fresh air tomorrow and some prayer. You are going to be all right. You have worked very hard in your recovery.

LMN, I am sorry it came to this. It is an awful feeling when one finally has to face reality. One word of advice: don't just discard your half of the money. I know it is tempting because all you want to do is get away. However, you deserve at least half (probably more). Get your share. You may be glad in the future that you did.

LMN , i'm so sorry.

YOu are in my thoughts, we are here!

:ghug3

I'm sorry too, LMN. No matter how strong our recovery, no matter how much we "know" relapses happen too often...it still feels like a kick in the gut when it happens.

Don't focus on your anger, and anger is very valid right now, but take time to think what you want from life and then follow that dream girl, because you deserve so much better than this.

See a lawyer before you give up everything. It may feel noble to just walk, but you have rights to family assets and the lawyer can tell you what they are.

Hugs because you probably need them right now. :hug:

And...LMN, it may not feel like it right now, but you WILL be okay and life WILL get better. I promise. :hug:

I too am sorry, yet, after following your story, not shocked. Talk to an attorney, no need to just walk away. Honestly, it makes the journey a little easier when there is a little cash in hand.

Know that we are here for you!

I'm so sorry to hear this LMN. You deserve the best that life has to offer. Please take care of you and know that we'll walk with you.

gentle gentle hugs
ke

LMN.. I am so sorry.
I pray a new place reveals itself too you soon

Carrie

The Belle Of The Ball

I'm so sorry. You are an incredibly strong woman and you will get through this. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

(((((LMN)))))

I am so sorry you have to go through this again, however, you are sounding
much stronger!!!!!

Yes, please do not be rash, check with some attorneys to see what your
options are, ie you stay in the house and he moves out again, etc Others
before me have said it, see an attorney. You should not have to be the
one to leave the home AT THIS TIME.

And, by going through legal channels, it will give you more time to find
a suitable stress free home for you and your fur kids.

Know we are walking with you in spirit.

Love and hugs,

(((LoveBear)))) I am sorry your once again going through this I had a feeling something was going on when you teased about someone keeping your pets to you I hope you change your mind and do talk with an attorney.

Sending prayers that God helps you find peace.

Edited: To add if you wanna talk you have my number.

I wish you Peace LMN

Thank you all for your replies.

I remember years ago there was a cocaine addiction commercial. (I cant find it on you tube though).

It went something like - the man snorts a few lines, then he snorts his boat, then his car, then his house. Moral of the story is drugs will make you lose everything.

Ironic, how I remember that commercial so well. Then I lived it.... without ever snorting anything. I watched in disbelief as things spiraled down quickly over the last couple of years. I knew things were bad, but I still believed he could fix it all. I was in denial, I made many excuses - bad economy, business deals went bad, I believed his lies, etc, etc. To this day, I still do not have all the facts, I had chose to not to ask, accept that he was lost in his addiction, forgive and attempt to rebuild.

*I* will rebuild my life. It wont be easy but I will survive. All the material things I had never brought me any happiness anyway. I would rather live in a shoe box then live with an addict.

P.S. I remember sending him an email saying in my attempts to "wake him" up!

"First will be the boat, then the car (just mine though, lol) then the house, then your family. What is it going to take?" Well, my worst nightmare came true. But in losing everything, I found ME again....and no amount of money could buy that. For that, I am very thankful and feel more blessed then I have in years.

I trust God has a plan for me and my life :)

You are truely blessed... as am i for knowing you.

You are an amazingly strong and loving woman.

I am heartbroken for you... but happy you have found YOU and are allowing her to live freely.

You are an inspiration.

Carrie

The Belle Of The Ball

:cries3: So difficult. Adding my prayers for you to have continued strength and being able to find serenity.

That's the spirit. We've all seen your strength shining through, over and over again.

you are in my thoughts, lmn... so sorry to read this news.