New Years Eve Codie Party!!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 2,684
Originally Posted by Ann 
It is just as well that I didn't know the entire truth at that first meeting, I would have probably driven off the first bridge. As it turns out, all the pain and all the "lessons" have brought me to a place in my life more beautiful than where I would be if I had just been a "normie".
Your words remind me of my journey, relating to back when my son was a teen; I, too, probably would have taken a bridge had I truly realized the truth. At one point, standing in my dining room with a counselor (county crisis team intervention), he having spoken with my son, my husband and me, had summed up the situation, stating the "prognosis" for our son was not good (i.e., as related to substance abuse). So there I stood, stunned, yet silently denying his assertion, thinking that my son was special, unique, whatever word applies, and that he would not be one of those, who would continue the downward spiral.
This thread is great. Thanks to all for sharing!
I think the best I've heard yet at this forum is the story of dollydo and the bb gun.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,741
Originally Posted by dollydo
I've done so many things both codie and crazy. Somehow, I think it is all related.
It's a Friday (pay day), my exabf comes home from work. Proceeds to tell me that he will not be eating dinner as he is going to shower and then leave to help one of his coworkers paint his fathers garage....right, I believe him.
He goes into the shower, dinner is ready, nothing fancy sloppy joes. I proceed to gather up his shoes (all three pair of them)put two pair in the trunk of my car, the other pair were his work boots...I decided that they were hungry...I stuffed one sloppy joe in each toe of the boots and added a few chips as a side dish.
Out he comes, all dressed to paint, clean jeans, shirt, socks, hair combed, he can't find his "going out" tennies, but he didn't care, he was in a hurry to meet his "friend" down the street, so he attempts to put on his trusty work boots ....OMG they don't fit, his feet grew in the shower! Nah...it was me, I did it!
You should have seen his nice white socks, rather than the ever so popular gold toe variety...he had made a new fashion statement, the red toed designer sloppy joe sock!
Did that stop him...no...off he went in his designer socks, almost running down the street to meet his dealer...didn't see or hear from him for 3 days...he came back with furry slippers on, not sure if he stole them or what! Another fashion statement in the making!
To be continued....remember...I'm No Angel!
It's a Friday (pay day), my exabf comes home from work. Proceeds to tell me that he will not be eating dinner as he is going to shower and then leave to help one of his coworkers paint his fathers garage....right, I believe him.
He goes into the shower, dinner is ready, nothing fancy sloppy joes. I proceed to gather up his shoes (all three pair of them)put two pair in the trunk of my car, the other pair were his work boots...I decided that they were hungry...I stuffed one sloppy joe in each toe of the boots and added a few chips as a side dish.
Out he comes, all dressed to paint, clean jeans, shirt, socks, hair combed, he can't find his "going out" tennies, but he didn't care, he was in a hurry to meet his "friend" down the street, so he attempts to put on his trusty work boots ....OMG they don't fit, his feet grew in the shower! Nah...it was me, I did it!
You should have seen his nice white socks, rather than the ever so popular gold toe variety...he had made a new fashion statement, the red toed designer sloppy joe sock!
Did that stop him...no...off he went in his designer socks, almost running down the street to meet his dealer...didn't see or hear from him for 3 days...he came back with furry slippers on, not sure if he stole them or what! Another fashion statement in the making!
To be continued....remember...I'm No Angel!
I have read several post while sipping my non alcoholic drink over the past weeks and while a few some of which were LMNS, had me have to clean my laptop well after this one I will NEVER be eating or drinking when reading here lol
Disclaimer: I hope I am better at keeping my boundaries now or my poor computer is in trouble.
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by Anaya
I think the best I've heard yet at this forum is the story of dollydo and the bb gun.
I have "normie" neighbors (or so I think) and to be quit honest, they seem very boring after reading that. lol
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Dolly and the bb gun is a classic, just thinking about it makes me laugh.
The one time I visited my son in jail, I took Clorex wipes because a member here had suggested it. Sure enough, the partition was dirty so I wiped...the phone was dirty so I wiped...the chairs in the waiting room seemed a little dingy, so I wiped. I felt really bad because it embarrassed my son! Think about it, HE's in jail in an orange jumpsuit and embarrassed because I'm cleaning.
I learned that no matter what I did or didn't do...it didn't make any difference. But that didn't matter either because at least I felt like I was doing "something".
Now don't think I'm doing the clean up after the New Year Pary here...I left my Clorox Wipes at home.
The one time I visited my son in jail, I took Clorex wipes because a member here had suggested it. Sure enough, the partition was dirty so I wiped...the phone was dirty so I wiped...the chairs in the waiting room seemed a little dingy, so I wiped. I felt really bad because it embarrassed my son! Think about it, HE's in jail in an orange jumpsuit and embarrassed because I'm cleaning.
I learned that no matter what I did or didn't do...it didn't make any difference. But that didn't matter either because at least I felt like I was doing "something".
Now don't think I'm doing the clean up after the New Year Pary here...I left my Clorox Wipes at home.
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Calif
Posts: 1,007
Oh Ann that was so funny.
It reminded me of the time I went to visit my son in prison. First you go to the "hospitality room" Nice Name huh? Anyway, then when they call your name you are to follow the yellow line to the prison.
OK, they call my name and I start following the yellow line (this is outside) now it's a bright, sunny day, and all of a sudden I couldn't see the yellow line anymore. I just kept walking until I came to a big steel door and was trying to open it when all of a sudden from the sky came a big voice (thought it was God for a minute) and the voice said "MOVE SLOWLY AWAY FROM THE DOOR WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" OMG, I look up and there is a gun tower and the stupid guy had his gun pointed at me!
I YELL BACK, "WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR PROBLEM?" He repeats get away from the door. All of a sudden a lady comes running over to me and says you're in a secure area you are not allowed here. I said, "what happen to the yellow line?" She said it's way back there, you came too far.
Like I'm suppose to know that!! I figured the damn line was suppose to take me all the way to the WIZARD!!
I hated that place, I don't know why my son went there so many times. Sure wasn't my idea of a good time!
Most of all I hated the fact that the cops all wore sunglasses so you couldn't tell if they were awake or asleep!
Did anyone ever have to send care packages in the mail? I use to send them faithfully to my son. They couldn't weight more than 30 pounds. What a hassle that was. However, when he was in the fire camp prison, they were really nice there, I asked if I could bring his package on my next visit so I wouldn't have to mail it. The officer of the day agreed. I'm ashamed to say that I think it was because of me the rule got changed where you couldn't bring in the packages in person anymore. Probably because when they weighed it, it was 65 pounds. The officer asked me if I had a person in the box? I said, no sir, just the things my son requested.
I was so worried about the package weighing so much and them having to send two inmates to take it out of my car, that I locked my keys in the car. I told the officer I'm sure my son can get them out without much of a problem. He just shook he head in disgust! Well?
They had to have AAA come on the property and someone had to meet the truck because they aren't allow on prison property. What a mess that day was! LOL
Shall I go on to the next visits to the various prisons??? LOL
Hugs, Devastated
It reminded me of the time I went to visit my son in prison. First you go to the "hospitality room" Nice Name huh? Anyway, then when they call your name you are to follow the yellow line to the prison.
OK, they call my name and I start following the yellow line (this is outside) now it's a bright, sunny day, and all of a sudden I couldn't see the yellow line anymore. I just kept walking until I came to a big steel door and was trying to open it when all of a sudden from the sky came a big voice (thought it was God for a minute) and the voice said "MOVE SLOWLY AWAY FROM THE DOOR WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" OMG, I look up and there is a gun tower and the stupid guy had his gun pointed at me!
I YELL BACK, "WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR PROBLEM?" He repeats get away from the door. All of a sudden a lady comes running over to me and says you're in a secure area you are not allowed here. I said, "what happen to the yellow line?" She said it's way back there, you came too far.
Like I'm suppose to know that!! I figured the damn line was suppose to take me all the way to the WIZARD!!
I hated that place, I don't know why my son went there so many times. Sure wasn't my idea of a good time!
Most of all I hated the fact that the cops all wore sunglasses so you couldn't tell if they were awake or asleep!
Did anyone ever have to send care packages in the mail? I use to send them faithfully to my son. They couldn't weight more than 30 pounds. What a hassle that was. However, when he was in the fire camp prison, they were really nice there, I asked if I could bring his package on my next visit so I wouldn't have to mail it. The officer of the day agreed. I'm ashamed to say that I think it was because of me the rule got changed where you couldn't bring in the packages in person anymore. Probably because when they weighed it, it was 65 pounds. The officer asked me if I had a person in the box? I said, no sir, just the things my son requested.
I was so worried about the package weighing so much and them having to send two inmates to take it out of my car, that I locked my keys in the car. I told the officer I'm sure my son can get them out without much of a problem. He just shook he head in disgust! Well?
They had to have AAA come on the property and someone had to meet the truck because they aren't allow on prison property. What a mess that day was! LOL
Shall I go on to the next visits to the various prisons??? LOL
Hugs, Devastated
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
LOL Dev. Boy, you sure make my life seem a little boring lol. But don't go getting the Codie guilts, I am sure I will have many pleasant field trips in the future with my son. I hope you and Ann will share you're ESH. 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 178
This thread makes me feel like not such a codie at all... I never checked his pupils,
never looked for his dope,never told his dealers off, never damaged his vehicle so he
couldn't go get dope.
I did spend hours every day for weeks trying to figure where he was going to get
treated even though he was not truly interested...I did ignore my little girl while doing
it. I did not feed her as well as I should of, I didn't take her to activities we had
planned, I lost friends by cancelling our outings over and over.
A few days ago my now ex confided (on the phone) that the dope he has access to right
now is really crappy and that he feels sick. That evening I had pizza with my daughter
and on the way out of the pizza place I talked to a lady that lived next door to the pizza place (she commented on something cute my daughter said or did). To me she looked like a dope addict. No idea if she was but it actually went through my head to ask her if she had dope. Yes. With my little 2 year old. Hope that counts as codie enough for y'all.
never looked for his dope,never told his dealers off, never damaged his vehicle so he
couldn't go get dope.
I did spend hours every day for weeks trying to figure where he was going to get
treated even though he was not truly interested...I did ignore my little girl while doing
it. I did not feed her as well as I should of, I didn't take her to activities we had
planned, I lost friends by cancelling our outings over and over.
A few days ago my now ex confided (on the phone) that the dope he has access to right
now is really crappy and that he feels sick. That evening I had pizza with my daughter
and on the way out of the pizza place I talked to a lady that lived next door to the pizza place (she commented on something cute my daughter said or did). To me she looked like a dope addict. No idea if she was but it actually went through my head to ask her if she had dope. Yes. With my little 2 year old. Hope that counts as codie enough for y'all.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Originally Posted by devastated
I was so worried about the package weighing so much and them having to send two inmates to take it out of my car, that I locked my keys in the car. I told the officer I'm sure my son can get them out without much of a problem. He just shook he head in disgust! Well?
I'm very good at picking locks (it was part of my Codie Detective training, lol) but never could hot wire a car.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Ok...I'm learning here that I'm not a Gold Medal Winning codependent......I'm just a run-of-the-mill ordinary codependent. You guys have some awesome stories of the lengths we go to in order to trip up the addict! Between all of us, I'm sure we could write a manual!
Boy.....and we think the addict is nuts? lol this has to be one of the funniest threads I've ever read on here. You guys ROCK!
I spent a whole lot of years in denial.....I just thought he was hanging out with the wrong people and if I could be rude enough to them, they wouldn't want to hang out with him anymore. HE wouldn't use drugs if THEY weren't around, right? Yeah...that worked....."Like....Dude...your Mom is crazy....here take this...you need it."
gentle hugs
ke
Boy.....and we think the addict is nuts? lol this has to be one of the funniest threads I've ever read on here. You guys ROCK!
I spent a whole lot of years in denial.....I just thought he was hanging out with the wrong people and if I could be rude enough to them, they wouldn't want to hang out with him anymore. HE wouldn't use drugs if THEY weren't around, right? Yeah...that worked....."Like....Dude...your Mom is crazy....here take this...you need it."
gentle hugs
ke
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by Kindeyes
Ok...I'm learning here that I'm not a Gold Medal Winning codependent......I'm just a run-of-the-mill ordinary codependent. You guys have some awesome stories of the lengths we go to in order to trip up the addict! Between all of us, I'm sure we could write a manual!
Boy.....and we think the addict is nuts? lol this has to be one of the funniest threads I've ever read on here. You guys ROCK!
I spent a whole lot of years in denial.....I just thought he was hanging out with the wrong people and if I could be rude enough to them, they wouldn't want to hang out with him anymore. HE wouldn't use drugs if THEY weren't around, right? Yeah...that worked....."Like....Dude...your Mom is crazy....here take this...you need it."
gentle hugs
ke
Boy.....and we think the addict is nuts? lol this has to be one of the funniest threads I've ever read on here. You guys ROCK!
I spent a whole lot of years in denial.....I just thought he was hanging out with the wrong people and if I could be rude enough to them, they wouldn't want to hang out with him anymore. HE wouldn't use drugs if THEY weren't around, right? Yeah...that worked....."Like....Dude...your Mom is crazy....here take this...you need it."
gentle hugs
ke
I remember when he had this sweet, adorable girlfriend who was crazy in love with him and I jokingly said to my husband "You just know she has some serious Daddy issues." My beautiful "blond" haired daughter walked in and said...No, she doesn't see her father, he is in jail!
P.S. My son was not home at the time!!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
My husband used to blame my son's "friends" and I would think to myself (and probably said it too) Are you kidding? He is the kid other parents should be concerned about.
As he's grown older, he is losing the good looks (meth addiction does that although he is still very handsome and he still has all of his teeth--great smile) and its tough to be too influential when a person has years of drug addiction under their belt and everyone knows it.
I'm sure there are a lot of young women saying "whew dodged that bullet" and unfortunately some who didn't.
gentle hugs
ke
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,741
Dev, you can't send care packages anymore you have to buy them now I know I have YOU to blame for that lol my oldest AS when he went to prison almost 2 years ago now his dad wanted us to purchase one when I spoke with son he said he had what he needed so we didn't. I had spent hours picking out stuff and adding up the prices insane.
February, I catch myself looking at some people and saying in my head they are on drugs I so hate that.
KE, my middle RAS, is like that ever charming good looking guy as well he is doing good right now his wife and him got back together yesterday I pray he stays on his recovery path.
February, I catch myself looking at some people and saying in my head they are on drugs I so hate that.
KE, my middle RAS, is like that ever charming good looking guy as well he is doing good right now his wife and him got back together yesterday I pray he stays on his recovery path.
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
ugh......I remembered another one tonight!!
I remember drug testing my husband, a grown man! (and this advice was given to me by my pastor, as well). He had to pass it to live here, one failure and he would have to move out.
It was a brilliant idea or so I thought at the time. So, I went on line and bought 25 drug test strips. He passed everyone single one. Oh, I was so happy, the problem was solved just like that and he loved us enough to stop. (that was my thinking). My denial ran so deep, it never even occurred to me would go through withdrawals or lack there of.
There was one little itsy bitsy problem to this amazing idea to control him.
I had bought the wrong kind of drug tests!!!
I had no idea there was a difference between opiates and opioid drug testing. All it proved was - he wasn't doing heroin and I was an idiot, lol.
I remember drug testing my husband, a grown man! (and this advice was given to me by my pastor, as well). He had to pass it to live here, one failure and he would have to move out.
It was a brilliant idea or so I thought at the time. So, I went on line and bought 25 drug test strips. He passed everyone single one. Oh, I was so happy, the problem was solved just like that and he loved us enough to stop. (that was my thinking). My denial ran so deep, it never even occurred to me would go through withdrawals or lack there of.
There was one little itsy bitsy problem to this amazing idea to control him.
I had bought the wrong kind of drug tests!!!
I had no idea there was a difference between opiates and opioid drug testing. All it proved was - he wasn't doing heroin and I was an idiot, lol.
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
What time is everyone coming to the party?? I have great "expectations" this year!!
Everyone is invited but those who shared get a special decoder ring this year!!
(Uhmmmm Vale?? cough, cough)
Everyone is invited but those who shared get a special decoder ring this year!!
(Uhmmmm Vale?? cough, cough)
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Calif
Posts: 1,007
Hello, I'm waiting outside the door. I got here early because I just know you're going to run out of the "special decoder rings!" LOL
Happy New Year to you all....
Hugs, Dev, Mr. Dev, and GGrandaughter
Happy New Year to you all....
Hugs, Dev, Mr. Dev, and GGrandaughter
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by devastated
Hello, I'm waiting outside the door. I got here early because I just know you're going to run out of the "special decoder rings!" LOL
Happy New Year to you all....
Hugs, Dev, Mr. Dev, and GGrandaughter
Happy New Year to you all....
Hugs, Dev, Mr. Dev, and GGrandaughter
I have a special ring just for you!
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Calif
Posts: 1,007
Oh LMN I remember when I was crazy with fear because my son had no place to live. He called me to tell me he was going to have to sleep in his storage shed. I remember crying and crying then came on the forum. I remember saying OMG, he's going to die because there are no windows. How will he breath.
That's when Ann came in and said, what a great idea. She assured me he would be able to breath. I never gave it a thought as to how he could afford a storage shed, and what the heck was in it?
After we all discussed it, I calmed down. Then he called and said "what? I don't have a storage shed!" OMG, after all my worrying! LOL
I forgot to tell you, LMN, I don't do WORK! I'm just one of those sit around and look pretty girls. You mean to tell me you don't have a "server" for this gala affair? perhaps Mr. LMN, can get out of the shed long enough to help out.
Just a thought????
Hugs Dev
That's when Ann came in and said, what a great idea. She assured me he would be able to breath. I never gave it a thought as to how he could afford a storage shed, and what the heck was in it?
After we all discussed it, I calmed down. Then he called and said "what? I don't have a storage shed!" OMG, after all my worrying! LOL
I forgot to tell you, LMN, I don't do WORK! I'm just one of those sit around and look pretty girls. You mean to tell me you don't have a "server" for this gala affair? perhaps Mr. LMN, can get out of the shed long enough to help out.
Just a thought????
Hugs Dev
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