FindingMe7

I am frustrated. I have brought most of my Ex's things to his mother's house. I made arrangements to bring the rest yesterday but she couldn't guarantee that he wouldn't be there at first, when she called back I just felt uncomfortable with him knowing when I would be there and trusting he wouldn't show up. I believe he is living there. So then I made arrangements to have my cousin and sister deliver everything tomorrow (even took a personal day at work), and now she says she's not available. The reasons I have offered to bring the things to her are because I do not want to give him any reason to come here, and she is really old. She does have a healthy daughter who has a healthy husband. So after this time I asked her to make arrangements to have them come get the stuff and I would move the items into my basement so nothing will be in my apartment. Also said she needs to respect my wishing to not have him anywhere near my home.

Tomorrow I will go to the police and get a RO against him. He keeps calling me and has done so many horrible things already I feel I need protection.

Then it is off to my bank to insure he will never have access to my accounts again. Since I never reported the robbery of my ATM card or the forged checks I know I have to accept there is not much they can do. But I will make sure it does not ever happen again.

I feel like his mother should have warned me about him. That she has known about his A for over 5 years, I feel like he has been lying to here about what has really happened between him and I. Should I tell her? Am I just as bad as her if I don't?

Do I try and take him to small claims court for all the merchandise he stole from my house? I know the chances of him paying me back are slim but when will he be held accountable?? I'm not going to keep track of him, what he owes me, and what he has returned to me. Which is nothing... I know I cannot believe a word he says. But he needs to be accountable for the things he has stolen from my daughters and me.

Help!!!!! Don't know what to do.

FindingMe7

This is what I want to stop doing. I don't know if the above steps will help me get there.


When we believe the stories, even though we know they are lies, we are lying to ourselves, hurting our trust of ourselves, turning our back on our own well being, and neglecting to love ourselves. If we decide it is okay to lie to ourselves, everyone else around us will think it is okay also.

helpme33

If she is really old she may not have realized the extent of his addicition. From experience, she is going to take his side regardless what you tell her. But if he is stealing from you he probably will from her too.

I had the same problem with my exAH and I closed out all of my accounts and opened new ones.

As far as the items he has stolen from you, if he is actually living there it's a pretty gray area as far as who owns what. If it was a stero, for example, you will need the receipt showing that you actually paid for it. My daughter went through this and when she reported the stolen items nothing was done.

I would put the items in weather proof bags an leave them on her front door step.

You can also requests that a pollice officer comes with him to pick up his things. But I would rather get rid of everything so he has no excuse to harrass you.

The RO is a very good idea!!! Take care of yourself!

crazybabie

My oldest son when he was younger stole my computer I called the police they came and said he lived in the home and was nothing they could do it was considered household for everyone he was a minor still but that wasn't why I ticked the cop off because I told him it is called a PC "personal" computer.

needless to say that didn't help I did get it back because my son told me who had it and crazy me went and threw a fit. Oh I do not miss those days.

FindingMe7

She is too old to lift things. That is helpful. Going to do the RO and then protect myself at the bank. He knows what he stole. He has admitted it time and time again. But I can't keep after him. I am so done.