Give Me a Freakin Break!!!
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Give Me a Freakin Break!!!
Two or so weeks ago, my husband had dental surgery. He was prescribed pain pills, gave them to his friend, and took them responsibly. However, he later told me that just those 7 pills really messed with his mind.
Well, today he had a "sports injury" and broke his arm. It's a real beauty of a break. The bone is in two. He asked his friends not to call me because he assumed I would become anxious. His closest friend did sent me a text and then a picture of the Xray. And for a brief few minutes I did become anxious.
He has a half cast on and will need to see an orthopedic surgeon on Monday. He was prescribed percocets (his DOC) and again gave them to his friend. He is going to try and not take any unless he can not sleep or feels a real need to. My guess is that he will need to. (He has one pill available to him for the night).
I am doing my best at staying on my side of the street but of course I can't help but wonder what this will do to him.
Also, without trying to sound selfish, this is a big pain for me, lol, as he will need my help and I will get stuck doing "everything" for a while. Also, he has always done the Christmas tree, the outside lights, etc. so I guess he wont being that any time soon although it was planned for tomorrow.
Really?? A broken arm now....Give me a freakin break.
P.S. I have told his friend that works from here, that he will have to help out. lol He said to make him out a "honey do" list and he would be glad to help. I started the list already and I have added more to it. haha just kidding,
Well, today he had a "sports injury" and broke his arm. It's a real beauty of a break. The bone is in two. He asked his friends not to call me because he assumed I would become anxious. His closest friend did sent me a text and then a picture of the Xray. And for a brief few minutes I did become anxious.
He has a half cast on and will need to see an orthopedic surgeon on Monday. He was prescribed percocets (his DOC) and again gave them to his friend. He is going to try and not take any unless he can not sleep or feels a real need to. My guess is that he will need to. (He has one pill available to him for the night).
I am doing my best at staying on my side of the street but of course I can't help but wonder what this will do to him.
Also, without trying to sound selfish, this is a big pain for me, lol, as he will need my help and I will get stuck doing "everything" for a while. Also, he has always done the Christmas tree, the outside lights, etc. so I guess he wont being that any time soon although it was planned for tomorrow.
Really?? A broken arm now....Give me a freakin break.
P.S. I have told his friend that works from here, that he will have to help out. lol He said to make him out a "honey do" list and he would be glad to help. I started the list already and I have added more to it. haha just kidding,
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 2,684
Wow. That's pretty bad. I imagine he's in a lot of pain. It sounds like you're doing your best to stay focused.
Can you enlist the help of other family members? You've a lot to juggle and it could get pretty stressful. You should take care of you, too.
Can you enlist the help of other family members? You've a lot to juggle and it could get pretty stressful. You should take care of you, too.
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
If he's taking them as "prescribed by his doctor" then I think he IS being responsible. It's not like he broke his arm on purpose...said with love in my heart. 
I think I would leave this one entirely between him and his doctor. If he abuses the medication, then it becomes your business as it affects your life. Otherwise he is a man with a broken arm who is in pain and taking medication as prescribed.
As I read this it sounds pert, and I don't mean it to, but sometime we have to draw the line between what is their stuff and what it ours...I never had any trouble with that line, until I had to draw it in my own life, lol.
Hugs
I think I would leave this one entirely between him and his doctor. If he abuses the medication, then it becomes your business as it affects your life. Otherwise he is a man with a broken arm who is in pain and taking medication as prescribed.
As I read this it sounds pert, and I don't mean it to, but sometime we have to draw the line between what is their stuff and what it ours...I never had any trouble with that line, until I had to draw it in my own life, lol.
Hugs
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
I am really not this selfish. I know it was an accident and I feel bad that he is in such pain.
We are very lucky to have some good, caring friends who came by with a big delicious chicken dish. The joke was they "feel" more for me as they all know my husband can be high maintenance when sick or injured (like many men).
Many friends have called and offered him rides to meeting or ask if we need anything. I am grateful for the help and concern.
I just have to find my balance of taking care of my needs still while helping him. Already, I had to help him shower without getting the cast wet, help him dress - he can't button his clothes yet, he didn't sleep at all night, etc.
I am being a great "nurse" with a smile and loving heart but I just don't want to lose sight of ME again. I guess this is test of my own recovery!
He is very appreciative and is trying hard to be self sufficient as much as possible but the codie in my is raging down deep. oh....The feeling of being needed can be such a high.
We are very lucky to have some good, caring friends who came by with a big delicious chicken dish. The joke was they "feel" more for me as they all know my husband can be high maintenance when sick or injured (like many men).
Many friends have called and offered him rides to meeting or ask if we need anything. I am grateful for the help and concern.
I just have to find my balance of taking care of my needs still while helping him. Already, I had to help him shower without getting the cast wet, help him dress - he can't button his clothes yet, he didn't sleep at all night, etc.
I am being a great "nurse" with a smile and loving heart but I just don't want to lose sight of ME again. I guess this is test of my own recovery!
He is very appreciative and is trying hard to be self sufficient as much as possible but the codie in my is raging down deep. oh....The feeling of being needed can be such a high.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,384
I don't think you're being selfish! I could see where this would be frustrating and anxiety causing. He's an addict. If he wants to abuse drugs he will--broken arm, or not. If he wants to be in recovery, he'll do that. When my RABF relapsed a couple of years ago, he had no injury. He just made up stuff to get drugs from the doctor. So, I'd see where it would be scary for you, but in reality, he could relapse any time--if he's not taking care of himself. That's my experience with RABF.
I'm glad you have good friends who are helping!
I'm glad you have good friends who are helping!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
It sounds like you have lots of great friends in your life! Hope his arm heals quickly....and you survive without going full blown Codie.
Breathe. Take a walk. Say a prayer. And spin within thyn own hoola hoop......
gentle hugs
ke
Breathe. Take a walk. Say a prayer. And spin within thyn own hoola hoop......
gentle hugs
ke
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by bluebelle 
I don't think you're being selfish! I could see where this would be frustrating and anxiety causing. He's an addict. If he wants to abuse drugs he will--broken arm, or not. If he wants to be in recovery, he'll do that. When my RABF relapsed a couple of years ago, he had no injury. He just made up stuff to get drugs from the doctor. So, I'd see where it would be scary for you, but in reality, he could relapse any time--if he's not taking care of himself. That's my experience with RABF.
I'm glad you have good friends who are helping!
I'm glad you have good friends who are helping!
I have never been a jealous person (jealous of other women) - not since I was in high school anyway. I could never understand why some people allowed that emotion. It's the worst feeling ever. If someone is going to cheat, there is nothing you can do it about. So why worry about it?? Worrying will not stop it, it will just make you sick. I have finally learned to apply the same logic to drug use.
Thank you all for your support too.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
here's a tip that will work well for him in the shower. Buy a box of plastic
trash bags for Waste Baskets. They are the perfect size. Put one on hand
up to elbow put rubber band around the ends near the elbow. Bingo, no
water gets on cast and he can pretty much shower on his own.
I know from previous personal experience. He will be in a cast for quite a
while with that type of break so will probably use the box up.
I don't want to sound suspicious but when I read your initial post about this
and it was just 2 weeks ago with the dental surgery and he admitted how
the medication messed with his head, the addict side of my braid said:
"WOW he found a legitimate way to get some more medication, I wonder
what he did to get the 'sports injury.'."
That was my 'addict thinking', because I have seen A's do that and a lot
worse intentionally to get pain meds.
I hope for his sake and yours that he can get some of his NA friends to
help him with a lot of what you have to do otherwise. I do believe it
will be better for both of you, especially since you are both attempting
to work your own programs, and a constant dish of 'nursing' the A can
put a ding in one's own recovery. Can you tell BTDT? lol
Sending healing thoughts and prayers for both of you.
Love and hugs,
trash bags for Waste Baskets. They are the perfect size. Put one on hand
up to elbow put rubber band around the ends near the elbow. Bingo, no
water gets on cast and he can pretty much shower on his own.
I know from previous personal experience. He will be in a cast for quite a
while with that type of break so will probably use the box up.
I don't want to sound suspicious but when I read your initial post about this
and it was just 2 weeks ago with the dental surgery and he admitted how
the medication messed with his head, the addict side of my braid said:
"WOW he found a legitimate way to get some more medication, I wonder
what he did to get the 'sports injury.'."
That was my 'addict thinking', because I have seen A's do that and a lot
worse intentionally to get pain meds.
I hope for his sake and yours that he can get some of his NA friends to
help him with a lot of what you have to do otherwise. I do believe it
will be better for both of you, especially since you are both attempting
to work your own programs, and a constant dish of 'nursing' the A can
put a ding in one's own recovery. Can you tell BTDT? lol
Sending healing thoughts and prayers for both of you.
Love and hugs,
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Thank you Laurie - We did use a garbage bag last night.
He was pitching in a NA softball game that he plays in every Saturday now. The irony is that it was his good friend, that works from our house and a great softball player who hit the ball. It was a line drive....right at him, lol, or so I like to call it. I asked him if he has any resentments and not done his step work yet. He denies it but my codie thinking says yes, lol. But we all think he should of caught it, I mean who blocks a line drive with their arm.
His other friend (another long time RA) took him to ER, took a picture from his phone of the Xray and his good friend sent it to me. Yep, it is broken in two.
I was just told he has only taken 2 pills so far and honestly I am not worrying about it. It's HIS recovery. I am more concerned about mine right now because you are so right...this could send me into a huge codie tailspin - if I let it.....but I won't!!
He was pitching in a NA softball game that he plays in every Saturday now. The irony is that it was his good friend, that works from our house and a great softball player who hit the ball. It was a line drive....right at him, lol, or so I like to call it. I asked him if he has any resentments and not done his step work yet. He denies it but my codie thinking says yes, lol. But we all think he should of caught it, I mean who blocks a line drive with their arm.
His other friend (another long time RA) took him to ER, took a picture from his phone of the Xray and his good friend sent it to me. Yep, it is broken in two.
I was just told he has only taken 2 pills so far and honestly I am not worrying about it. It's HIS recovery. I am more concerned about mine right now because you are so right...this could send me into a huge codie tailspin - if I let it.....but I won't!!
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Well, it's broken alright. He will need surgery to put in a pin and a plate.
I think I am going need a very long vacation after he recovers.
ughhhhhhhhhhhh...give me a break....but not literally!!
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
but never did. 
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Originally Posted by hello-kitty
Wow. That's a crazy looking break. Makes me feel sick to my stomach just looking at it. Ouch!
The irony is that he was a baseball pitcher since he was 7 yrs old (even played in the minor leagues until he says he lost his passion and discipline because he started making "real" money in his career) and NEVER had any injuries.
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