Going to see the lawyer in an hour and a half
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
Going to see the lawyer in an hour and a half
Today is the day.. I have an appointment with my lawyer at 2:30 this afternoon for a divorce consultation.. I printed out a divorce petition, a marriage settlement agreement and a waiver so that AH wont be served and he signed everything.. Everything is uncontested as we dont have anything in our names together and yes I put my dog in the settlement agreement lol, he cant take care of himself much less a dog.. I'm hoping that instead of a consultation that I'm just going to be able to file today and start the beginning journey of my new life.. my next hurdle will be getting him out of my house as he has nowhere to go.. I'm trying to be as fair and reasonable as I can in giving him time to find other lodgings but i'm sure my patience will run thin very quickly.. this is why i'm hiring a lawyer and not filing with the courts directly..
I'm scared, I'm sad, I feel a little guilt and I also feel a little bit of freedom as well.. Hopefully all of this will be over with by the beginning of the year and I can use 2013 to work on becoming a healthy me..
I'm scared, I'm sad, I feel a little guilt and I also feel a little bit of freedom as well.. Hopefully all of this will be over with by the beginning of the year and I can use 2013 to work on becoming a healthy me..
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
Things went really well.. I had already printed up the paperwork before my appointment and AH signed everything.. We have no kids, no assets, heck we don't even share the same last name.. So it's all uncontested.. My divorce will be final on Dec 20th.. Sad that it has to be right at Christmas but I'm happy that I can start the new year off on the right foot.. My biggest hurdle will be getting him out of my house.. For those on you who pray.. Pray that happens soon and with no fuss...
Thanks again you guys for all of your strength and hope.. I plan on sticking around this board for a good long time even after everything is finalized..
Thanks again you guys for all of your strength and hope.. I plan on sticking around this board for a good long time even after everything is finalized..
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Uk
Posts: 764
Originally Posted by jerect 
Today is the day.. I have an appointment with my lawyer at 2:30 this afternoon for a divorce consultation.. I printed out a divorce petition, a marriage settlement agreement and a waiver so that AH wont be served and he signed everything.. Everything is uncontested as we dont have anything in our names together and yes I put my dog in the settlement agreement lol, he cant take care of himself much less a dog.. I'm hoping that instead of a consultation that I'm just going to be able to file today and start the beginning journey of my new life.. my next hurdle will be getting him out of my house as he has nowhere to go.. I'm trying to be as fair and reasonable as I can in giving him time to find other lodgings but i'm sure my patience will run thin very quickly.. this is why i'm hiring a lawyer and not filing with the courts directly..
I'm scared, I'm sad, I feel a little guilt and I also feel a little bit of freedom as well.. Hopefully all of this will be over with by the beginning of the year and I can use 2013 to work on becoming a healthy me..
I'm scared, I'm sad, I feel a little guilt and I also feel a little bit of freedom as well.. Hopefully all of this will be over with by the beginning of the year and I can use 2013 to work on becoming a healthy me..
Good luck.
Evey x
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Working through this now, Jerect, will let you put it to rest. Most times when a relationship is over it's like closing the door on a room that is already empty.
All this will lead to wonderful new beginnings...just ahead in the road, waiting for you, and they will appear only when you are ready.
Hugs for you, brave lady.
All this will lead to wonderful new beginnings...just ahead in the road, waiting for you, and they will appear only when you are ready.
Hugs for you, brave lady.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 285
Jerect - You and your doggie are in my prayers. I know this is not easy but you will begin to have a sense of peace and relief. My uncontested default divorce was finalized last month. He never showed up thank God. As I was sitting there, I was extremly anxious and was texting my brother. When the Sheriff came out to ask how many people are waiting for someone in holding for being arrested, almost the entire room of about 30 people stoodup. I text my brother to tell him how anxious I was and I'm sitting there in a room with a bunch of people that are their waiting for their loved ones to get out of jail. He replied, just think, if you weren't getting a divorce, you would be there too. I realized then, that he was right and it was my 1st step to be free of the chains of his addiction.
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,691
Yes....you and your doggie are in my prayers too. It sounds like you are doing all that you need to do. The timing is never good but it does let you start the new year fresh.
Awhile ago C.O. responded to a post I wrote about the guilt that I felt about my ex husband...she said make a list of the things that I felt guilty about and then look again at who caused them in the first place. My guilt evaporated pretty quickly with that one! Yea for C.O.!!!!!
I left my husband over 18 months ago and have still stuck around so I hope that you will too. I never want to forget the importance of working my own program and taking care of me. Everytime I stopped "recovery work" due to the addict no longer being in my life I found another one. Sort of like an addict that doesn't work a program...sooner or later they are likely to relapse. So....sooner or later I'm likely to get involved with another addict if I don't stay strong in my recovery. My picker might be broken but with the help of recovery it will be a lot more likely to head me in the right direction if there is "another time".
Hang in there girl! You're doing the right thing....
Awhile ago C.O. responded to a post I wrote about the guilt that I felt about my ex husband...she said make a list of the things that I felt guilty about and then look again at who caused them in the first place. My guilt evaporated pretty quickly with that one! Yea for C.O.!!!!!
I left my husband over 18 months ago and have still stuck around so I hope that you will too. I never want to forget the importance of working my own program and taking care of me. Everytime I stopped "recovery work" due to the addict no longer being in my life I found another one. Sort of like an addict that doesn't work a program...sooner or later they are likely to relapse. So....sooner or later I'm likely to get involved with another addict if I don't stay strong in my recovery. My picker might be broken but with the help of recovery it will be a lot more likely to head me in the right direction if there is "another time".
Hang in there girl! You're doing the right thing....
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
Originally Posted by LoveMeNot
Just think, someday soon, you will be able keep your tp where it belongs. No more trunk for you!
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
Originally Posted by supportforme
Jerect - You and your doggie are in my prayers. I know this is not easy but you will begin to have a sense of peace and relief. My uncontested default divorce was finalized last month. He never showed up thank God. As I was sitting there, I was extremly anxious and was texting my brother. When the Sheriff came out to ask how many people are waiting for someone in holding for being arrested, almost the entire room of about 30 people stoodup. I text my brother to tell him how anxious I was and I'm sitting there in a room with a bunch of people that are their waiting for their loved ones to get out of jail. He replied, just think, if you weren't getting a divorce, you would be there too. I realized then, that he was right and it was my 1st step to be free of the chains of his addiction.
I know that if my STBXAH stays on this path he is going to end up in jail.. Sad but it's is life and because of his choices he's lost his home and his wife and the fur children that he loves... Maybe this is his bottom I don't know.. I just know that I hit mine and I'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired...
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
Originally Posted by lightseeker
Yes....you and your doggie are in my prayers too. It sounds like you are doing all that you need to do. The timing is never good but it does let you start the new year fresh.
Awhile ago C.O. responded to a post I wrote about the guilt that I felt about my ex husband...she said make a list of the things that I felt guilty about and then look again at who caused them in the first place. My guilt evaporated pretty quickly with that one! Yea for C.O.!!!!!
I left my husband over 18 months ago and have still stuck around so I hope that you will too. I never want to forget the importance of working my own program and taking care of me. Everytime I stopped "recovery work" due to the addict no longer being in my life I found another one. Sort of like an addict that doesn't work a program...sooner or later they are likely to relapse. So....sooner or later I'm likely to get involved with another addict if I don't stay strong in my recovery. My picker might be broken but with the help of recovery it will be a lot more likely to head me in the right direction if there is "another time".
Hang in there girl! You're doing the right thing....
Awhile ago C.O. responded to a post I wrote about the guilt that I felt about my ex husband...she said make a list of the things that I felt guilty about and then look again at who caused them in the first place. My guilt evaporated pretty quickly with that one! Yea for C.O.!!!!!
I left my husband over 18 months ago and have still stuck around so I hope that you will too. I never want to forget the importance of working my own program and taking care of me. Everytime I stopped "recovery work" due to the addict no longer being in my life I found another one. Sort of like an addict that doesn't work a program...sooner or later they are likely to relapse. So....sooner or later I'm likely to get involved with another addict if I don't stay strong in my recovery. My picker might be broken but with the help of recovery it will be a lot more likely to head me in the right direction if there is "another time".
Hang in there girl! You're doing the right thing....
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,892
Originally Posted by jerect
Thank you lightseeker... 2013 is going to be my year of growth and self healing.. I just want to be me, no dating, no relationships just the one I have with myself.. I need to get myself healthy so that I don't end up with another addict.. I'm going to fill my life with the things I love and spending time with my family...
Big Hugs hunny. Keep your chin up! You're doing so well. Keep looking on the brightside! Stay positive! You're doing brilliant! Give the dog a big Hugs too!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
DEC 20,huh?
(PERFECT timing!)
December solstice 2012: 21 Dec 11:12 (UTC)
...this means the longest night is over---and things are going to
get brighter and brighter ( not cheerleading....verifiable science!)
...20 DEC (of last year) is when I went N/C.Huge difference.
Congratulations for getting off the addiction roller coaster.
..and NO,it wasn't a spouse for me---but ANY contact with this
horriffic affliction is TERRIBLY disquieting!
(you DOGGIE will be happier....pets HATE tension!)
(PERFECT timing!)
December solstice 2012: 21 Dec 11:12 (UTC)
...this means the longest night is over---and things are going to
get brighter and brighter ( not cheerleading....verifiable science!)
...20 DEC (of last year) is when I went N/C.Huge difference.
Congratulations for getting off the addiction roller coaster.
..and NO,it wasn't a spouse for me---but ANY contact with this
horriffic affliction is TERRIBLY disquieting!
(you DOGGIE will be happier....pets HATE tension!)
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